selling your soul to the D

[drifter]

Hey guys

I am just in the process of applying for jobs at big commercial law firms. I don't know what to make of it all yet but I feel a bit like I am selling out. The whole big corporation thing is scary.

Have any of you out there felt like you have sold out by working in an organisation or even a field of work which you don't respect?

How did you get through it? Are you still there?

[M4A1]

2 outcomes are possible.

1. You maintain your idea about them being evil, unethical, or however not right for you. And stay firm with that idea. You struggle to keep from giving in and it becomes a drag everyday to goto work. The stress adds up and your resentment grows. You do barely enough to get by and they notice that you aren't blending in. They are likely to increase the pressure to force you out.

No matter what happens, if you stay firm with your idea. You aren't going to be around for a long time. Unless you have set a timeline or a goal on when and why are you staying.

2. Your idea about them changes as you work with them. You get along with the co-workers and evetually blend in with them. "They really aren't that bad" you thought. And live happily ever after. :)

I'm still working after a yr and 3 months. Goal is set to sticking with it for 2 years or another job offer or 'til school acceptance come along.

[Fizzgig]

I think M4 has the right idea. In a big corporation, you're going to come across the "sink or swim" mentality, which in this case entails a certain amount of personal struggle regarding the big picture of your firm.

The little picture is easy enough to grasp. If you're lucky, you're going to like some of your co-workers, respect or at least manage to deal with your boss, and get involved with some challenging projects. The big picture takes a little more work, and a lot more thought. I happen to work for one of the largest companies in the world (I kid you not). When I was in graduate school I wrote several scathing critiques of my current industry. Do I feel like a sell out? Every. Single. Day. Do they pay my bills? Every. Single. Week. Does this make it okay? I don't know. Simply put, I was offered an opportunity unlike any I'd ever seen before. The people I work with are just that. People. They go home to their families, they volunteer, they care about the world around them. Just like everyone else. It's all very commonplace, and can lead to a general feeling of complacency. But do I ever feel like I'm contributing to an organization that swallows up little companies one after another, performs research that makes me shudder, and reduces me to a number? Of course. It's a very personal struggle, and the more you ponder ethics and a wider world view, the more difficult it becomes.

Good luck to you. I'm still just trying to figure it all out. Oh yeah. The meetings? They will make you want to pull your hair out.

[sunbear]

I think of it this way, we were entrapped by the corperate bounty hunters. To make a living, we really don't have too many other choices. :confused:

[openeyes]

You know how sometimes the market "corrects" itself by going down? That's kind of what I had to do to my attitude and perspective on life after graduation.

It might seem depressing at first to ditch your optimism and idealism, but it's not so bad once you get used to it. This doesn't mean you have to become a terrible person, but at least you can live with yourself knowing that you're just one person in a big, imperfect world.

I took my English major and all my idealism and went to volunteer for a year, helping low-income families through a home ownership program. The result: I became very depressed, felt lost and isolated, and did not even feel that my work made a significant impact. Since I was only receiving an $800/mo living stipend, I blew a lot of my savings that I'd planned to spend on grad school later.

Obviously, I couldn't keep going like that. I moved back to my home state and decided to find a regular job and catch up on bills. My current employers: 1) a media research company which is paid by TV producers, who in turn get paid to rot children's brains, make people feel inadequate, etc., and 2) a Mexican restaurant owned by white guys from Texas who keep the profits and pay the Mexican-American cooks next to nothing.

I'm not proud of either of these jobs -- they are in direct opposition to some of my core values.

But at least I don't feel like I'm drowning anymore. I can pay my rent at the end of each month. And I can relate better to other people my age who are just trying to get ahead right now.

While working for a non-profit, I noticed that the people who were most effective in helping others were also the most financially secure. Non-profits organizations need a lot of money to operate. Who sponsors them? Corporations. Rich philanthopists. Lawyers from big commercial firms. Regular people who are trying to alleviate their middle-class guilt.

Your job on earth is not to save the whole world, it's just to be yourself and let life run through you. If you take care of yourself first, you will have a lot more to offer to those around you.

You could retire early and spend your time helping people. Or get to a position of power and change the system for the better. Look at the long run. You might feel like a jerk right now, but it's not forever.

P.S. - My dad spent 35 years with a big law firm, and he is the most honest, decent person I know (of course he's my dad, so I'm biased).

[dakotagopher]

Openeyes makes some good points. I do a ton of work with my local nonprofits and were it not for the generosity of "the elite" we wouldn't be able to get much accomplished.

I often get sick of my job also; after college I thought hard about becoming a nonprofit lawyer or a Peace Corps doctor, but decided against both because 1) I hate the law and 2) I don't think I'm smart enough to make it through Med school without becoming an alcoholic. Ha. Anyway, I am pretty successful and while at times I do not feel I am contributing to the big utopian society, I tell myself that the taxes I pay and the time I volunteer are the best ways I can contribute to society. Not sure if this is a cop out or not.

You can't save the world by yourself. Even if you must take a job with a so-called "evil" corporation to survive, you can still make massive contributions to our society. I have said for years that if every person in their 20's that didn't have kids would volunteer and mentor a poor kid in their community, we'd solve most of our social problems in a generation. I really believe this. This is a big commitment, but worth it. I highly recommend Big Brothers/Big Sisters and your local chapter of Boys & Girls Club if you're looking for some fulfillment. If you can't donate the time or are uncomfortable making the emotional investment, give money you've make working at the evil corporation. Even $25 a month helps.

[M4A1]

I agree to some extent with openeyes and dakota, but I think most of what you said is much more idealistic than realistic. I think what you said CAN work in the perfect scenario where you, the philanthropic person, has strong and kind ideals to help people to begin with, where you are ONLY working for the evil corporation for their money so that you can finance these non-profit organizations' operation.

There are 2 problems with what you are proposing:

1) people who would go working for some evil corporate with an intent at heart to help are scarce. It takes great discipline and immovable conviction to not be affected by your environment-- given that it is truly evil.

2) With that idea you are proposing, a person would do the grunt works at non-profit organizations are fools. Why should they give such an endeavor and sacrifice when they can just be a financier of the operations in the first place? Isn't the person who finances is also counting on someone to work full-time at a non-profit? Someone has to make the sacrifice right? But when you put it this way like you have just now. WHY should I make the sacrifice so that you can live up to both having a good life and done some good deeds? And didn't you just ruined it for everyone who would have wanted to do the grunt work? After reading this idea, why should anyone work full-time for non-profits?

Yes there are exceptions. There are minority of people who are already better-off and can effort to work full-time at non-profits and live comfortably. But I think what really matters is that a person must genuinely want to help at heart, with that in mind, you'll do good no matter what you must go through. But you shouldn't go around swaying the indecisive or people who are on the fence to just "make money now and help later"-- they'll never turn back.

Making good money is hardwork, it means working fulltime somewhere and putting in investment to build a career with that company. It takes a lot of effort, and you will become emotionally attached to it-- if you want to be successful at it. If you are doing it via a good and honest company, then good for you, all the more powers to ya. But if you plan to do it with some company that you don't believe in, or that they are flat-out evil, and still think that you'll just make some money and then quit? Then it's already too late. Because that's exactly how they justify their actions, and it has already got ya.