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View Full Version : Good God, I've Unleashed a Monster--RANT


jrwilheim
09-07-2005, 04:44 PM
Okay, about a month and a half ago, I got into a discussion about money with my mother, and she told me she and my father were invested "mostly in Nasdaq stocks." That raised all kinds of bells in my mind, so I asked her to look at their actual statements and found out they weren't as badly invested as I thought. On the other hand, the value of their accounts is only around $95K combined, they're 15 years from retirement.

They inherited some money from my grandfather a couple years ago, of which they have about $70K left, so I suggested that my mother look for a house for around $100K, pay 40% down and pay off the rest on a 15-year mortgage. (Believe it or not, this is actually possible in Wichita, KS, where they live). I said to her pointedly, over and over, that they should buy a house because they were looking at having a substantially reduced income in retirement, and the best strategy for this was to have a house paid off.

Did this sink in? I thought so, when my mother told me they were looking at houses. But then they bought a house that was WAY too expensive and--worse--took a THIRTY-YEAR, $95K mortgage from my grandmother to buy it.

GOD--what is it about my parents that they never get the point of anything I say, that they always miss what is ACTUALLY THE POINT in whatever I'm saying? The point of this was to buy a house and be able to pay it off in 15 years, not buy a house that's totally beyond your means with assistance from Grandma! I can see exactly where this will all end--with them selling the house and moving in with me in 20 years!!

lawya girl
09-07-2005, 04:49 PM
Isn't it scary when you grow up and realize that your parents DON'T actually know everything when it comes to real life? My parents have started asking me questions about real estate, taxes, etc. Hello? I'm so not prepared to answer those questions. I thought THEY knew that stuff. I worry about my parents' retirement constantly. It's frightening.

Deadend
09-07-2005, 04:59 PM
Sounds like bad decisions.... (not that I really know, it just sounds like the point you're trying to make).

Still... they're adults and it's their retirement, not yours. They're planning badly - hopefully you won't end up wearing it.

LakeJay
09-07-2005, 04:59 PM
Isn't it scary when you grow up and realize that your parents DON'T actually know everything when it comes to real life? My parents have started asking me questions about real estate, taxes, etc. Hello? I'm so not prepared to answer those questions. I thought THEY knew that stuff. I worry about my parents' retirement constantly. It's frightening.

I totally empathize with you on this one. I want to be able to answer their questions but I question whether I am a good enough authority to provide answers. I am worried about their retirement as well. I'm wondering if I should refer them to my financial advisor. :frustrate

jrwilheim
09-07-2005, 05:27 PM
See, the thing I'm upset about--even more than their making what I regard as a BAD financial decision--is the constant pattern of their not really listening to what I'm really saying. It's been a constant pattern in my life, and this is just the most egregious example of it.