Claire
11-09-2005, 06:36 PM
Hi all. I'm new to the forum, just wafting around the web (like my life) and found this site by accident! I am AMAZED and greatly RELIEVED that I am not alone! (I thought I was) I'd been pondering the concept of a mid-20's crisis, and decided to research it a little, not realising that there was already a particular term for it! Yay! :) So I'm not some random freak... ;)
A little about me:
My name is Claire, in 26 years of age, and live in Australia. I am a perpetual student, currently completing my BA in Sociology and Anthropology, but am now wondering WHY??? I could have my doctorerate by now, considdering how many years I have been working on this damn degree. I'm certainly now stupid! I get super grades when I bother, which is almost NEVER, as I don't feel interested, tested, or motivated. Basically I must be bored. I feel unhappy much of the time, which is a new thing for me, as I have always been a very cheery and happy person. As well as studying full time (if I can FORCE myself to go to a class) I am also working casually for the Department of Children's Services (so in a Social Work, one on one, position with HIGH CRISIS young people) It's such an important job, but quite draining (I have had my ribs, nose, and wrist broken through working with these violent clients. I also have nightmares from seeing someone trying to slice open veins, and hang themselves!) as you can see. Even though I work casual, I may as well be working full time, as I normally work a 60 hour week! So I am tired all the time. I'm making good money, but I never seem to get ahead. I have some stupid credit card debt ($2000) from when I was 19, and am struggling to pay it off every week. I no longer use a CC, and once had a debt collector after me because I wasn't paying the minimum on time each week, because I was struggling. I'm 26 and still feel like I'm 10 years old! I live with my partner of 11 years (high school romance) and that is one of the good things in my life. He's beautiful! But, even he seems lost and uncertain about career and life. Although I don't think that he dwells on the angst as much as me....
Last year was hell, where we had a serious car accident where our car was written off, and then insurance would only give us $3000 even though it wasn't our fault, so we are back in debt for another car (the previous one was paid off). We were broken into and robbed, and our house was trashed, last Christmas EVE, including all of our pressies! :mad: (and we had no insurance - we do NOW!) I found out I had a chronic illness and couldn't ever have children. And my "mother in law" decided she hated me after 10 years and hasn't spoken to us in almost 2 years! (My man's mum.) It was embarassing to tell people about it, so we pretended everything was okay....
This year has been a little better, but I fell like I'm floating along to nowhere in particular. No destination. I'm so confused and frustrated! I'm pulled in so many directions. I'm exhausted when I first open my eyes in the morning! I just want to be happy.... sigh.... :redface:
Love Claire x
PS> I have been to counselling, and I have checked out if I am depressed (just to cover those answers from you all! ;) )
A little about me:
My name is Claire, in 26 years of age, and live in Australia. I am a perpetual student, currently completing my BA in Sociology and Anthropology, but am now wondering WHY??? I could have my doctorerate by now, considdering how many years I have been working on this damn degree. I'm certainly now stupid! I get super grades when I bother, which is almost NEVER, as I don't feel interested, tested, or motivated. Basically I must be bored. I feel unhappy much of the time, which is a new thing for me, as I have always been a very cheery and happy person. As well as studying full time (if I can FORCE myself to go to a class) I am also working casually for the Department of Children's Services (so in a Social Work, one on one, position with HIGH CRISIS young people) It's such an important job, but quite draining (I have had my ribs, nose, and wrist broken through working with these violent clients. I also have nightmares from seeing someone trying to slice open veins, and hang themselves!) as you can see. Even though I work casual, I may as well be working full time, as I normally work a 60 hour week! So I am tired all the time. I'm making good money, but I never seem to get ahead. I have some stupid credit card debt ($2000) from when I was 19, and am struggling to pay it off every week. I no longer use a CC, and once had a debt collector after me because I wasn't paying the minimum on time each week, because I was struggling. I'm 26 and still feel like I'm 10 years old! I live with my partner of 11 years (high school romance) and that is one of the good things in my life. He's beautiful! But, even he seems lost and uncertain about career and life. Although I don't think that he dwells on the angst as much as me....
Last year was hell, where we had a serious car accident where our car was written off, and then insurance would only give us $3000 even though it wasn't our fault, so we are back in debt for another car (the previous one was paid off). We were broken into and robbed, and our house was trashed, last Christmas EVE, including all of our pressies! :mad: (and we had no insurance - we do NOW!) I found out I had a chronic illness and couldn't ever have children. And my "mother in law" decided she hated me after 10 years and hasn't spoken to us in almost 2 years! (My man's mum.) It was embarassing to tell people about it, so we pretended everything was okay....
This year has been a little better, but I fell like I'm floating along to nowhere in particular. No destination. I'm so confused and frustrated! I'm pulled in so many directions. I'm exhausted when I first open my eyes in the morning! I just want to be happy.... sigh.... :redface:
Love Claire x
PS> I have been to counselling, and I have checked out if I am depressed (just to cover those answers from you all! ;) )