View Full Version : Younger people
seren1411
07-31-2003, 10:50 PM
I'm really embarrassed to be admitting this - but I just spent a couple of hours chatting online with a guy I met (in person, not online) about a year ago. 1-3.30 in the morning. And, well, there was flirting. We're both students attending the same university, but have been out of touch for a while because I've been away sick and came back around the start of the summer vacation.
BUT...
[had to be one of those coming, now didn't there?]
I'm postgrad (26) and he's - well, younger (20). I don't do things like that. I'm not into younger people and the age gap between us is - well, it's ICKY. Or at least, that seems to be the case when it's the woman who's older.
He's going to be in town this afternoon, and we're meeting up then. I was really attracted to him before which bothered me a lot, and we just had this fantastic conversation... I don't tend to find myself attracted to many people and I can't believe that I'm interested in him. Advice please?
meri78
07-31-2003, 11:03 PM
seren-i would pursue this in a "light dating" sort of manner. (my friend taught me that term :)) light dating is basically dating just to be dating, w/no expectation of a commitment or long-term romance. i would say that 20 is absolutely too young for a serious, long-term relationship. however, if you just want to "light date" him than it's fine. have fun, girl!! :) -meri
pisces2473
07-31-2003, 11:04 PM
I was going to add something similar...just hang out with him casually, even if you'd like it to be something more ;) and then if it goes that way, great! If not, you still have a little crush to hang out with!
seren1411
07-31-2003, 11:09 PM
He's younger than two out of three of my kid brothers!!! :torn:
You're both right - and I'm not looking for commitment, but that would have to give anyone pause.
Right?
pisces2473
07-31-2003, 11:30 PM
It does sound weird...when you think about it. So don't! LOL Have fun girl! How did you meet him? Were you a TA for his class? Maybe things will not go any further and you'll be like whatever. Who knows...
Rainster
07-31-2003, 11:32 PM
"Light dating," I like that...
There doesn't need to be LTR potential for you to hang out, have a few beers, have fun!
:)
seren1411
07-31-2003, 11:42 PM
No Jen - I wouldn't even be contemplating dating one of my students. For that - bye, bye career.
He's an engineering student.
So. The gist is, use him for... whatever?
Don't know if I can. He's NICE.
Also young. :exclaim:
pisces2473
07-31-2003, 11:55 PM
I'm not saying sleep with him!!! LOL Just meet up for a drink, etc. and just hang out with him as a friend. :)
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:01 AM
Sorry meant that in the sense 'whatever comes up/ seems appropriate', not 'go out with him purely for casual sex'. It's just the 'older woman' thing has me freaked!
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:05 AM
LOL Seren! Casual sex = not good.
If you are just hanging out, then it's not a case of older woman/younger man...just friends, right? ;)
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:08 AM
But... flirting... attracted! Pure of body. Not pure of mind.
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:09 AM
Wait...did you ever flirt in person or just online? B/c that can be different... :confused:
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:10 AM
Both. Only online recently since haven't seen each other for some time.
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:12 AM
Hmmmm, I say go and just see him. It would be good to get out, right? And fun to see him?
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:17 AM
Oh, all right then. Yes and yes. LOL
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:24 AM
Whoo hoo!!!! Seren is going out!
:heehee:
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:28 AM
Bite me. :p
Anyhow, I better get to bed - it's 5.30 am and I have a da- an appointment this afternoon.
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:30 AM
WHAT??? Such rudeness!
"We are not amuuuused."
5:30 am! Wow!
seren1411
08-01-2003, 12:31 AM
Were too amused!
pisces2473
08-01-2003, 12:33 AM
Yeah, okay, I'll admit it...I was amused, LOL.
Off to bed for me...not working but sort of working....
coll214
08-01-2003, 10:24 AM
Seren- so what did you decide? are you going to "see" the younger guy? I say go for it, one day at a time.....;)
seren1411
08-01-2003, 10:51 AM
Decided to go ahead with it - I'm meeting this afternoon - he's going to ring when he gets to the city. And... we'll see.
coll214
08-01-2003, 10:55 AM
oohh...keep us posted! Inquiring minds want to know :D !!
seren1411
08-01-2003, 10:58 AM
Am going nuts at present as am waiting for call - I hate this, I can't concentrate on ANYTHING :googly:
coll214
08-01-2003, 11:09 AM
Hang in there!! I'm sure he'll call soon...did you make any plans or are you going to decide once he's there?
seren1411
08-01-2003, 11:22 AM
We're deciding once he's here.
coll214
08-01-2003, 11:25 AM
Well, i hope you have fun ;) !
seren1411
08-01-2003, 06:42 PM
:confused:
I did.
I'm now dating a guy who's six years younger than me!!!!!!
I'm in shock!!!
Rainster
08-01-2003, 06:50 PM
That's *great*! You go, girl!!!
seren1411
08-01-2003, 06:55 PM
Thanks Rainster :)
I haven't been able to stop hearing Simon & Garfunkel's 'Mrs Robinson' in my head all day. That REALLY doesn't bode well...
Yes Seren please keep your online yenta friends updated...
what a great saga! i have to cover that awful shift I was on a few weeks ago, so please keep the drama coming!
And the age difference isn't strange - since we live in a more gender equal society, why should outmoded issues of difference in age even be thrown into the calculation if not for arbitrary reasons?
Maturity, intellect, ambition count for a lot more than age, right?
Rainster
08-01-2003, 07:14 PM
As long as you guys connected and enjoyed each other's company, that's the only thing that matters! :)
seren1411
08-01-2003, 08:07 PM
All right jku, I know I owe you email!!!! - and what's "yenta"?
...poor guy, he even got vetted by my flatmate (who incidentally was acting just like a big brother - SO embarrassing!!!)
pisces2473
08-02-2003, 01:13 AM
Seren! So what happened between I'm waiting for him to call and I'm dating him??????? Details, please!
A yenta is a Jewish matchmaker.
seren1411
08-02-2003, 02:07 AM
He callled!!!:lol:
Don't trip on the e-mail - its cool Seren... :)
So how did it go? I'm here on the awful shift. It's probably 9am over in the UK.
I misplaced/couldn't find my id card on my way out. There's more security here than at more important places, like a school or bank!
seren1411
08-02-2003, 04:25 AM
have SENT the email.
It went really well. :) Good conversation, lots of laughter, nice kiss...
Oh dear, there go Simon & Garfunkel again!
Poor you - you seem to get stuck with that shift quite a bit! But leaving your id card? - no way to get out of it!!!
Hi Seren - After I chatted with you I found my ID card - YEAH! I save 15 bucks that I could put towards other expenses - like a Pavement re-issue I've wanted for a while.
So any news with your "friend" Ms. Robinson? ;)
coll214
08-04-2003, 04:07 PM
congratulations Seren!! I'm glad to hear things went well :D !! Don't worry about the age thing, after awhile you won't even think about it....that must have been a GOOD conversation ;) !! Here's to you Mrs. Robinson (lifting glass in toast!!)....LOL
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