Men's Thesaurus

[Longshotss]

I'M GOING FISHING"
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Means: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Means: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Means: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU."
Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

[hybridgirl]

*lol* sounds like most of the men i know :p

[Conflusterd]

okay , you've got a point to some of your statements , but let me clear up a few things.

I'M GOING FISHING"

Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

Really Means = I'm going to take one day out of my week just for me to do what ever I want not what you want me to do and if that means standing by a river drinking so be it , it makes me happy!

"IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

Really means = Women have there "thing(s)" so why can't a guy have his ? Men will never understand women , who I personally think are all crazy :D in a good way off course.

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

Really means = The above is bullshit - Men offer all the time to help out with dinner , Women just suspect different all the time. Eg. man = honey would you like me to rub your back ? woman = Oh ! He must be looking for sex tonight.

Women us men are genuine most of the time , give us the benefit of the doubt.

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

Really means = Its sort of right but for a different reason. Men use this response in self defense even when they have done nothing wrong. Normally when the woman is bitching about something or someone we say "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..." if we , god forbid disagree with the bitching then were in the dog house , so to save all sanity and stay in the good books the response of "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..." is defiantly good.

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

Really means = Believe it or not girls , us men do want to take care of you and if we see you slaving at it were sincere in saying take it easy honey - again women always assuming men having a motive.

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."


I agree with this one , your a total dog if you forget her birthday ! Come on , no excuse here.


"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."


Really means = Men don't like to fuss , make a big deal , we want the easiest and quickest solution to a problem and not drag it out. What's so wrong with that ?


"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."


Really Means = Men dont think like you girls so when you ask us to get something that you have put away , you may aswell give us a map aswell to try and figure out were you put the shit , over there somewhere is not a good response either as a matter of fact.


The ones l left out well that's for another day. This is just for fun and for the record what said above is my experience of women.

I'm married with one son and I do my fair share with cooking , cleaning , laundry , our son ect while working a full time job , so I'm far from the attitude "its women's work"


Hope ya'll have a good day.