My cousin's wedding [Archive] - QLC Message Boards

PenforPrez

07-09-2006, 11:20 PM

Last Saturday, I was at my cousin's wedding in PA. Now, something interesting happened to me. I caught the garter at the reception.

Let me say here I should not have caught it. My cousin threw it over his shoulder right at the best man, who was right next to me. The best man is probably 5 foot 8 and weighs about 400 pounds. But he made no attempt at all to catch it, and everyone said so.

I saw it coming, and I just instinctively reached out and caught it out of the air with one hand. Never a conscious thought.

So I caught the garter. Now, if my memory of wedding superstitions is correct, then I'm the next one to get married. God help us all! :surprised

But the superstition made me think. Could it possibly be a good omen for me and my female friend (I don't know what else to call it!) from online that I'm stuck on? Since I got my cell phone, she and I have talked on it for hours, which I take as a very positive sign. :) I've been getting very good vibes from her over the last twoish weeks. :cool:

Until this weekend; I've heard from her all of 30 seconds since Thursday, and I've been wanting to cry for 3 solid days cause I've not been in contact with her. She likes to go out of town on weekends, so I'm not worried she's run away. I was out of touch with her last week largely because I've been away from my Internet. She didn't think to tell me, and I wasn't able to ask.

She refuses to give me her cell number, so she calls me. But to me, the fact that she had called me so much before Thursday. seemed a very positive thing. If she didn't give a damn about me, she wouldn't call. Or am I being too hopeful? I just hate being out of touch with her this long; she makes me feel better just to have her to talk to. :) She gets busy and she can't call me or IM me sometimes. I know that, but it still upsets me. "No promises," as she always tells me.

I guess with all this rambling, I'm trying to sort out several questions. Am I just clingy? Are the good signs evidence of a positive trend? Am I right to want to cry when I don't have her to talk to? Or am I just totally wrong and I'm headed for one hell of a heartache?

Paul

KeepRockin

07-09-2006, 11:34 PM

She's a tease, eh? Right now, she has all of the control. Get her number!!! Let things happen at a steady pace...don't rush it because of a wedding tradition.

Good luck. ;):

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 12:01 AM

I'll be honest with you...

I got as far as "she refuses to give me her number," and all thought of anything else shriveled up. That's just not a good thing, no matter how you look at it.

pisces2473

07-10-2006, 12:02 AM

I'll be honest with you...

I got as far as "she refuses to give me her number," and all thought of anything else shriveled up. That's just not a good thing, no matter how you look at it.
I thought the exact same thing. Sorry buddy.

spokes

07-10-2006, 12:06 AM

i guess the good thing about the situation is that she racks up the long distance charges when she calls you - is this the same chick who would e-mail about ther dates or some situation like that?

ugarachel82

07-10-2006, 12:07 AM

Um, wedding superstitions are just that...superstitions. They are what you make of them. I've always thought them silly and never paid them much attention to be honest.

And as for your "female friend"...I can't say that I'm seeing much of a "relationship" here. You don't even have her number. She's calling the shots. So she can do whatever the crap she wants to and you don't know the half of it. Have you guys even met yet? I think you're putting the cart before the horse and I think you know it. I'd meet her first before you think of wedding bells....honestly.

NewMrs.

07-10-2006, 12:13 AM

Um, wedding superstitions are just that...superstitions. They are what you make of them. I've always thought them silly and never paid them much attention to be honest.

When my cousin got married years ago, my two sisters, who were around 14 and 12 at the time, caught the bouquet together. We've had several weddings in the family since, and none of them were for my sisters.

I think that guys who have girlfriends but aren't ready yet for a commitment purposely try not to catch the garter.

Chameleon

07-10-2006, 01:16 AM

When I read that post all I could think of was "Oh my god. Oh my f-ing god."

Pen, what will it take for you to believe that your "relationship" with this girl isn't real? You are in serious fantasy land! You have never met her and don't even have her number (after 3 years!!!) and you are thinking she's going to marry you?

She doesn't trust you enough to give you her number (maybe she thinks you'll start calling like a crazed stalker), she's boinking her neighbor, she lives thousands of miles away and you've never met. I think your chances of a real relationship with this woman much less marriage is severely handicapped, garter or no.

If you wanted to put power to the garter superstition, you can try believing that you are going to meet someone locally who you'll have a real-life, face to face romance with and end up married to soon. I think your chances of hooking up with the next cute female you run across are much higher than the chances of anything happening with IM chick.

Pen, you need help. Wanting to cry for 3 days because a girl who has never expressed a romantic interest in you is not in contact? She's become a drug to you, no one should be granted that much control over your emotions. The same way that a guy sleeping with a girl doesn't mean necessarily mean that he wants anything more than to sleep with said girl, a girl keeping contact with you doesn't necessarily mean that she wants anything more from you. She might do it cuz it's good for her ego, she might be doing it because she enjoys toying with you, she might be doing it because she feels guilty about leading you on for so long and not nipping the problem at the bud. What ever her reason, it's pretty clear to everyone but you that it's not a coy attempt to show her love for you.

PenforPrez

07-10-2006, 01:17 AM

I'll be honest with you...

I got as far as "she refuses to give me her number," and all thought of anything else shriveled up. That's just not a good thing, no matter how you look at it.

The woman does have a privacy obsession. She was stalked a few years ago, and I think she's overreacting. I think so anyway. Her cell phone number is unlisted, seriously. When she calls me, no number comes up on my phone. I've never heard of that. She says "someday" she might give me her number, and that does bother me. I've known her for how many years, and we've shared so many private things?

It especially bothers me that she won't let me send her the birthday card I bought (her birthday was July 4). Yes, I know she told me not to get anything. Can't I be spontaneous? Spontaneity is NOT something I'm known for. I wanted to do it, as a nice gesture. Especially after Bachelor #2 bought her a purebred golden retriever puppy (along with other expensive trinkets) for her birthday. I, very shrewdly, tried to get her to name the dog after me. :huge: She said Paul was not a good dog name. :(

But he came over the night before her birthday to her house with cake and champagne. She sent him out for ice cream so she and I could have time together before I left. Made me feel good.

We were talking about love a week or so ago. She says: "I was in love once, and it didn't turn out well." That struck me as odd. I mean, I have the opposite problem -- I fall in love too easily. It's not worked well for me either. But guess what? I keep trying.

i guess the good thing about the situation is that she racks up the long distance charges when she calls you

She and I have the same cell phone provider. Costs no minutes at all. :huge:

Um, wedding superstitions are just that...superstitions. They are what you make of them. I've always thought them silly and never paid them much attention to be honest.

I know; seems silly really. I don't take it seriously. Who wants to marry a guy whose never been able to move out of his parents house at 26?? :P

My mind constantly runs off on strange tangents. I've gone from thinking about sex to thinking about chocolate cake, and it made perfect sense to me. The point here being that, somehow, in the strange inner workings of my mind , thinking about the superstition of the garter made me think of this whole situation.

And as for your "female friend"...I can't say that I'm seeing much of a "relationship" here. You don't even have her number. She's calling the shots. So she can do whatever the crap she wants to and you don't know the half of it. Have you guys even met yet? I think you're putting the cart before the horse and I think you know it. I'd meet her first before you think of wedding bells....honestly.

Do I know it? Yes, I cannot deny that. I wasn't thinking wedding bells, per se; I'm not that crazy yet! But I have always trusted her to tell me the truth. I tell her the truth, always, and it's caused me problems. But it adds to trust, and she's been far more revealing of herself of late.

Of course she's calling the shots. I'm well aware of that. I'm not level-headed enough to play that role, quite honestly. I'm not a man of strong will and resolve. I like strong-willed women who do that. My problem is, I always find the high-strung women who damage themselves in relationships. I'm high-strung a little bit myself; I have no room to talk. *ahem*

I went out with a woman awhile back who would be insanely jealous anytime I mentioned ANY woman at all. I would go to lunch with a good friend of mine, a 60-year old happily married Mormon ex-boss, and I'd be accused of cheating. That seems to be the price I pay for needing strong women.

I realize there's a lot of strange things here, but nobody has ever made me feel like she does. I'm a bit of a loner; every day, I want to tell somebody to go away. She's the only person I've never wanted to say that to, ever. She makes me feel so much better about myself, and that helps right now. Wanting to cry is not good, but I chalk that up to depression and sad songs.

As far as "female friend," I don't know what to call her. I referred to her as "ladyfriend" in a previous post, and that offended a couple of people. I'm a little old-fashioned, and there's no old-fashioned name for this. She's not my girlfriend, but we're more than friends; we have feelings for each other.

Paul

Chameleon

07-10-2006, 01:32 AM

It especially bothers me that she won't let me send her the birthday card I bought (her birthday was July 4). Yes, I know she told me not to get anything. Can't I be spontaneous? Spontaneity is NOT something I'm known for. I wanted to do it, as a nice gesture. Especially after Bachelor #2 bought her a purebred golden retriever puppy (along with other expensive trinkets) for her birthday. I, very shrewdly, tried to get her to name the dog after me. :huge: She said Paul was not a good dog name. :(

But he came over the night before her birthday to her house with cake and champagne. She sent him out for ice cream so she and I could have time together before I left. Made me feel good.
You want her to name her pet, a gift from her BOYFRIEND after you? Strangely fitting but kinda twisted. You don't know where she lives or her number while a guy is buying her animals and trinkets and you still believe you are in the running? You don't give pets (purebred ones at that) to people you are having casual relationships with. How do you even know if he left the house "to go get icecream"? She says she's emotionally unavailable, but she seems to be making herself pretty available, emotionally and physically, to the other guy.

Of course she's calling the shots. I'm well aware of that. I'm not level-headed enough to play that role, quite honestly. I'm not a man of strong will and resolve. I like strong-willed women who do that. My problem is, I always find the high-strung women who damage themselves in relationships. I'm high-strung a little bit myself; I have no room to talk. *ahem*

I went out with a woman awhile back who would be insanely jealous anytime I mentioned ANY woman at all. I would go to lunch with a good friend of mine, a 60-year old happily married Mormon ex-boss, and I'd be accused of cheating. That seems to be the price I pay for needing strong women.

I realize there's a lot of strange things here, but nobody has ever made me feel like she does. I'm a bit of a loner; every day, I want to tell somebody to go away. She's the only person I've never wanted to say that to, ever. She makes me feel so much better about myself, and that helps right now. Wanting to cry is not good, but I chalk that up to depression and sad songs.

You are mixing up "strong woman" with "unbalanced woman", a truely strong personality doesn't come with insecurity and jealousy. You can't sign up to be walked all over by anyone, it's not healthy! You don't have to be the dominant partner but you in the very least have to have some say in the partnership. You've never met her! How do you know you won't tell her to go away? Have you ever considered that the fact that she rations herself in such small doses, driving you into a frenzy is why you aren't sick of her yet?

PenforPrez

07-10-2006, 01:47 AM

Pen, what will it take for you to believe that your "relationship" with this girl isn't real? You are in serious fantasy land! You have never met her and don't even have her number (after 3 years!!!) and you are thinking she's going to marry you?

Please let me stress again that I was NOT seriously contemplating married life with her, etc. I was thinking of the situation as it stands at present.

If you wanted to put power to the garter superstition, you can try believing that you are going to meet someone locally who you'll have a real-life, face to face romance with and end up married to soon. I think your chances of hooking up with the next cute female you run across are much higher than the chances of anything happening with IM chick.

I seriously cannot meet single women locally, at all. I'm still trying to forget the last time somebody set me up on a date; that should never have happened. :googly: That was my last serious date, and that'll be three years come October. Seriously, I cannot name anybody single in my social circle. Except for a gay friend of mine, and he's pissed off at being single, too.

On the rare occasion I do meet a single lady I like and want to go out with, I always wait too long to ask. I know a woman who owns a small record label that I wanted to ask out, and for 3 months, I tried. But I never found the nerve. Now she's going out with a guy who looks like he needs to be sheared like a sheep! :surprised I'm not a fan of her type of music, but I would have been a better choice than Lassie! :p

I know women who go through boyfriends like I go through socks, and I never knew they were single in the first place! And silly me, I always want a turn through the revolving door myself. The "cute chicks" that you're talking about ALWAYS have somebody lined up, and it's never me.

I'm always "the Platonic friend." You know what Platonic means, don't you? Platonic is Greek for: "You ain't getting none of this good stuff!" :p

Pen, you need help. Wanting to cry for 3 days because a girl who has never expressed a romantic interest in you is not in contact? She's become a drug to you, no one should be granted that much control over your emotions.

This time last year, I was in serious fits of rage for about 4 hours a day. I'm much happier being upset over this, quite honestly. When I was a rageaholic, I didn't even know who I was anymore. Now I can care about somebody again; it is a drug, and a potent one. BTW, my therapist agrees with you.

But she has expressed romantic interest in me; she told me that a long time ago. She does have feelings for me, she does think of me as more than a friend; she just doesn't know what to think. I know how I feel, and I tell her so.

Paul

and1grad

07-10-2006, 02:22 AM

Well all that being said, I agree with Cham. You're settin yourself up for a world of hurt and the thing that is strange to me is that you not only know it but you seem to prefer it. It seems to be clear to you that this relationship, of sorts, is more harmful than beneficial to you but you seem to not be deterred by that. I'm not gonna beat a dead horse since it seems like you're goin into this with your eyes wide open. All I can say is good luck with your girl (rather than ladyfriend, I'd call her "secret squirrel")...and maybe, get a helmet.

Lastly, this is gonna sound meaner than intended but, nothing you've posted makes me think you wouldnt call her like crazy...making me think maybe NOT giving you her number was/is actually a wise move.

Tenshi28

07-10-2006, 05:48 AM

Paul, you seem like a very sweet guy and I think this girl is obviously playing with you taking advantage of that fact.

I can sort of understand that you rather keep whatever you have with this girl now -even if it never leads to a real relationship- rather than breaking all contact and be alone, but I think it's pretty clear that you're in for a lot of pain and disappointments.

My advice: after three years it's time to grab the bull by the horns, cut the nonsense and make it clear to her, if she feels anything for you at all then you should meet, if only once, and talk things over and after that we'll see. If she doesn't want to, then it's time to move on for good and forget about this whole business, as painful and that will be.

You probably can't possibly see, at this point, how breaking this "relationship" could do you any good because you're very hooked up, but you got to think about it, if you don't anything, one day she's going to be done with you and throw you away, so think about how will that feel.

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 08:39 AM

Bear in mind that there are plenty of people who are perfectly content to get their egos stroked by being worshipped from afar, and have absolutely no intention of ever turning online/long-distance/phone dalliances into anything real. Somebody who has a flesh and blood partner is not likely to give that up for somebody who is a voice on a phone of words on a screen.

One major danger of the online age is that it gives people the chance to set up situations of faux intimacy, with ulterior motives (whether consciously mean, a la "I'm gonna keep this person dangling and (s)he has NO idea that it's all fantasy to me and nothing I'd ever actually consider moving it to something "real," 'cause I like the attention too much," or totally subconscious). In any case, it's unfortunately NOT uncommon for one person to feed a fantasy that they have no intention of making reality.

Fantasy doesn't stay satisfying for long. You're asking for trouble.

allie1105

07-10-2006, 08:51 AM

I understand WHY some people try the online dating thing. Like you, Penn, many feel that there are no singles in their area, or they just have trouble approaching the opposite sex. As a matter of fact, I know a woman who met her husband online. They are both wonderful people and have a wonderful marriage.

As far as the reality of it...well, it really doesn't happen that way all that often. Like others have commented on, she may just like the idea of you, but really has no intention of meeting you. Its a harsh reality, but I think the general point that others are trying to get across is not to put all of your eggs in one basket :) From what you said, the likeliness of a substantial relationship occuring is slim to none. Go out and meet some ladies, you seem like a sweet guy!!!!

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 08:55 AM

allie1105

07-10-2006, 09:06 AM

Paul isn't talking about online dating, though, really. Online dating is a method of meeting people that is supposed to open up your options in terms of introducing you to people other than ones you might just run into by chance out and about. But the intent is to actually meet and date. This, if I understand it, is a long-distance, chat- and phone-based situation where not only is there no intent to actually ever meet, the girl is already seeing somebody, won't give her number out, and is simply interested in interacting with him strictly on her terms. I wouldn't define that as online dating. Online dating is simply using the net to expand your options of people you intend to actually hypothetically date.

Agreed, but it seems as though he does want more from the relationship - othewise I don't think this would be an issue for him. Although he has stated in his posts that he does not want to marry her, he obviously wants to see where it can go. To me, that would constitute as online dating...but since I have never done that, I guess I am not really qualified to say.

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 09:15 AM

I would agree that Paul would like for it to be more, from what he's said. But on her end, it's not the same thing. No matter what she's feeding him. That's my take. I think he's pretty much seen the end of where this can go.

Chameleon

07-10-2006, 10:22 AM

Paul, have you considered the possibility that being "in love" with the IM lady kinda gets in the way of meeting someone else in real life? It is quite possible that you are giving off an emotionally unavailabe vibe that people are picking up on. And not asking people out isn't working in your favor either. Not that you are necessarily in an emotional state where you should be dating, but those two things are definitely working against you.

On the rare occasion I do meet a single lady I like and want to go out with, I always wait too long to ask. I know a woman who owns a small record label that I wanted to ask out, and for 3 months, I tried. But I never found the nerve. Now she's going out with a guy who looks like he needs to be sheared like a sheep! :surprised I'm not a fan of her type of music, but I would have been a better choice than Lassie! :p

You aren't a fan of her kind of music (i.e. you probably won't be 100% supportive of her life's work) and yet you would be a better choice that a guy (hirsuite or no) who actually asked her out? You are dissing a woman for (a) not being psychic and (b) not being shallow enough?
I know women who go through boyfriends like I go through socks, and I never knew they were single in the first place! And silly me, I always want a turn through the revolving door myself. The "cute chicks" that you're talking about ALWAYS have somebody lined up, and it's never me.

I'm always "the Platonic friend." You know what Platonic means, don't you? Platonic is Greek for: "You ain't getting none of this good stuff!" :p

You "want a turn through the revolving door"? Please tell me that was a joke. You just want your turn at bat even though you know these women aren't capable of forming lasting connections? That's the kind of woman you are really after? What is "this good stuff" that your female friends are keeping from you?

This time last year, I was in serious fits of rage for about 4 hours a day. I'm much happier being upset over this, quite honestly. When I was a rageaholic, I didn't even know who I was anymore. Now I can care about somebody again; it is a drug, and a potent one. BTW, my therapist agrees with you.

But she has expressed romantic interest in me; she told me that a long time ago. She does have feelings for me, she does think of me as more than a friend; she just doesn't know what to think. I know how I feel, and I tell her so.

Paul

I'm glad you are off the rageahol (have you considered that that probably interfered with your ability to get laid, I mean, find a girlfriend?) but your new addiction isn't doing you any favors either. She may have expressed an interest a long time ago, but she is sleeping with someone else now, she isn't using HIM as a substitute for you, she's just USING YOU. You are the one being played in this, not him. Hopefully he'll wise up to the unhealthy relationship you have with his girl and ask her to cut off contact with you out of respect for THEIR real life, face-to-face relationship. Or maybe this is entertaining to him too.

I have casual acquaintances who have my cell number and whose calls I take. Read the writing on the wall, Paul, seriously.

meatwad

07-10-2006, 12:11 PM

I think catching the garter was a sign you should have asked out one of the bridesmaids.

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 12:15 PM

I'm going to be likely the only person on here who WON'T call bullshit on your claims of "I can't meet anybody." Most people don't get that it's just not a possibility in really small towns like ours...under other circumstances, it stands to reason to say, "Hey, buddy, maybe because you're focused on long-distance girl, you're just not seeing all the options before you." But, no...I know all too well that when you live rurally, there just aren't options before you...and people don't really get that. I don't know what they imagine the dating pool is like.

But, this makes your only real option, if you'd like to date somebody more locally (not to mention more realistically), to be to consider relocating to somewhere where there are more options - something I won't do, because I would feel like a supreme, enormous tool if I uprooted myself and moved based on a bad dating scene), or do actual online dating services, to take a proactive step in ferreting out realistic dating options in your reasonable area, if they exist (more my speed). In any case...it's better than putting all your eggs into the basket of a nonrelationship.

KeepRockin

07-10-2006, 03:01 PM

I think catching the garter was a sign you should have asked out one of the bridesmaids.
...or whoever caught the bride's bouquet!

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 03:20 PM

PenforPrez

07-10-2006, 03:20 PM

...or whoever caught the bride's bouquet!

Honestly, I wanted to. She was a very nice lady, and very pretty. But I was 700 miles from home, and we left the next morning. :(

KeepRockin

07-10-2006, 03:36 PM

Hah. An 11-year old caught the bouquet at my brother's wedding on Sat.

Pretty appropriate, given that most women "of marriagable age" could have cared less about such an annoying, demeaning ritual. Hi, you all fight over who's going to get hitched next...I'll be over here at the bar. :googly:
That's hilarious. I went to a family wedding recently and it was planned that a newly engaged couple (a bridesmaid and her future hubby) were to catch the garter and bouquet. I stood there with my 22 year old sis simply to freak Dad out! The pictures are hilarious- my sister and I are both former basketball players and we're totally striking defensive box-out poses in all of the photos (but had no intention what-so-ever to even attempt the catch). You'd think we were ready to tackle someone!

I don't want a bouquet toss at my own wedding. My friends would take your approach and I'd have my 11-year old cousin catching it! Heck, if we weren't trying to get a rise out of Daddy-o (who is an ultra conservative business dude!), we probably would have stayed at the bar, too.

WorkInProgress

07-10-2006, 03:51 PM

Hah. An 11-year old caught the bouquet at my brother's wedding on Sat.

Pretty appropriate, given that most women "of marriagable age" could have cared less about such an annoying, demeaning ritual. Hi, you all fight over who's going to get hitched next...I'll be over here at the bar. :googly:

Yeah, ick. I refuse to do this at my hypothetical wedding. It was fun when I was 6 or 7.

At a friend's wedding, they decided to give the bride's bouquet to whichever couple had been together the longest. The DJ had all the couples get up and slow dance, and then called rising numbers (starting with "just met her tonight" and ending at almost 60 years). It was well done and not tacky at all, as the DJ did it at a good pace, and they picked a nice oldies song for it. And, even though I was there alone, I hardly noticed.

cheshrcarol

07-10-2006, 03:53 PM

Winter Storm

07-10-2006, 03:57 PM

Yeah I'd think the bouquet throwing is getting a bit out of date. At the last wedding I went to, hardly any of us even wanted to get up to do it and I purposely ducked it.

It's kinda embarassing really. Like, let's throw these flowers down to the sorry single chicks in hopes that their land themselves one one day. Pfff. Who needs it?

wordsmith

07-10-2006, 04:00 PM

Yeah, it seems like every wedding I've been to lately, it's next to IMPOSSIBLE to get anybody but little kids out on the floor for either bouquet or garter toss.

allie1105

07-10-2006, 04:06 PM

At my wedding, we did the bouquet toss thing...and I wish I hadn't! I did not have many children at my wedding, unless they were family, and one of my husbands 7 year old cousin's caught the bouquet. The funny part was when one of my husband's brothers, who is 25, caught the garter. He ended up going through the routine of putting it on her leg, but it was hysterical. He used his shoe, lol...I was dissapointed with who caught it, but the end result just may have been worth it. The pictures are priceless.

meatwad

07-10-2006, 04:10 PM

I was at a wedding once where they tossed the garter and the bride's cousin caught it. He was all drunk and acting like an idot. So he puts the garter over his head and starts dancing around and laughing. His brother comes over and whispers something in his ear and he rips the thing off his head and starts freaking out.

Basically, his brother reminded him wear the garter came from and to make matters worse, reminded him where it had to go since his sister had caught the bouquet. :huge:

Winter Storm

07-10-2006, 04:12 PM

PenforPrez

07-11-2006, 09:45 AM

Basically, his brother reminded him wear the garter came from and to make matters worse, reminded him where it had to go since his sister had caught the bouquet. :huge:

I faced that problem at my cousin's wedding. They were insistent upon my taking the garter and slipping it up the leg of the woman who caught the bouquet. I was horribly embarassed. :redface: And I knew my cousin was loving every second of it.

I tried to be funny about it, but it's hard to be in that situation. She was cool about it, though.

Paul

mishl982

07-11-2006, 11:44 AM

LOL at my cousin's wedding, it was kind of planned that her brother would catch the garter and that his girlfriend, J, would catch the bouquet. So when bouqet tossing came, she reached for it, but had to fight some little 9 year old girl to get it! This girl seriously would not let go! J was pretty embarassed she had to fight the girl for the bouquet, but in the end the girl got it, but my cousin still put the garter on J (via teeth, of course). I bet the girl was grossed out when she found out it could have been her!!

Then my cousin's maid of honor was freaking out because she gave S her garter as "something borrowed and blue" and to see that my cousin's bro was slobbering and putting it on his gf's leg grossed her out. What she didn't realize was that my cousin had a fake garter to use for the garter toss and let her brother use that however he pleased :D