work and boyfriend both suck

[workaholic?]

i hate fridays...i really do...i mean i love them in the sense that the weekend is almost here, but i hate having to work on them. since we get every other friday off, working on the other fridays really sucks. i don't want to be here at all! what's worse is knowing that i will probably sit here and do absolutely nothing all day even though i have things that i need to do.

and to top it all off...i'm mad at my boyfriend this morning. not really mad mad, but irritated enough to make my day shitty. when discussing our schedules for the upcoming couple of months, my birthday came up and he informed me that he may not be back in town from recruiting because he already told someone (who works here with us mind you) that he'd go golfing with him that day...now let's think about this...he's already going to be out of town that sunday night through thursday afternoon and my birthday is on that thursday, and now he's saying he may not come back until that friday because he needs to go GOLFING with someone he can go golfing with anytime he wants??? i asked him if it even ever rings a bell with him that October 5th is my birthday...like when someone mentions that date, does he even THINK of me??? he didn't have much of a response. it pisses me off. and you know what else pisses me off? that he took a day of vacation today...WHY? so he could go shooting with some people this afternoon. and all the fridays that we're supposed to be off and he comes to work anyway even though i BEG him to stay home and spend the day with me. yeah...that makes me feel good.

[old_school_soul]

People need time and space from their partners. You can't harp on someone because they want to spend time with someone other than you, or if they don't include you.

[workaholic?]

People need time and space from their partners. You can't harp on someone because they want to spend time with someone other than you, or if they don't include you.

it's not really about whether he spends his time off with me or not. it's that he's not even willing to take the days off that he's SUPPOSED to be off, but he's plenty willing to take a vacation day to go do something with people while i work.

and can i just mention that he also was not in town last year for my 21st birthday??

[Crazycrash]

Sorrry Old School, This is about works birthday, not some regular day...If he cares about her then he should be there for her birthday, certainly not going to play golf

[rocket333d]

I don't know why people think Fridays are so great. If Fridays were actually great, they'd be Saturdays and you wouldn't have to work on them.

And your boyfriend going and playing golf on your birthday is pretty stinky. "Time apart" is one thing, but your birthday? Lame.

/I'll be 22 on 10/3, so happy birthday to both of us.

[old_school_soul]

Maybe it's because I don't give a superficial status to a "birthday". It can be celebrated anywhere near someone's birthday. I don't think celebrating it the day after or before means you care any less.

[rocket333d]

Maybe it's because I don't give a superficial status to a "birthday". It can be celebrated anywhere near someone's birthday. I don't think celebrating it the day after or before means you care any less.

No, but I think it's the reason that he'll be away that is the bad part. I won't get to see my boyfriend on mine because he'll be away at college. That's okay. What her issue is is that her boyfriend is choosing not to come home because he's playing golf, not because he's doing something necessary.

[workaholic?]

No, but I think it's the reason that he'll be away that is the bad part. I won't get to see my boyfriend on mine because he'll be away at college. That's okay. What her issue is is that her boyfriend is choosing not to come home because he's playing golf, not because he's doing something necessary.

EXACTLY! i understood last year because we hadn't been dating all that long and he was out of town for recruiting again...and because the next day he took a 1000-mile roadtrip with me to Nashville so i could see my friends and see a football game. so it was okay then. but this year it is definitely a choice, and if he actually goes through with the current plan, it's going to make me angry, no doubt.

[Deavan]

Here is some advice...you are only 22 and you will have many and other more important birthdays in the future...he is clearly choosing to do the golfing thing but I don't thing his intention is to piss you off... maybe he has something special planned for that Saturday night... have you asked him that yet? I say don't give him an ultamdium on this one because chances are he may just walk away...I am assuming he is just as young as you and guys in their early 20s do NOT think a lot of the time... but if you let him know how important this is to you and he still does something else then time to re-evaulate your relationship...

[CTGirl]

Here is some advice...you are only 22 and you will have many and other more important birthdays in the future...he is clearly choosing to do the golfing thing but I don't thing his intention is to piss you off... maybe he has something special planned for that Saturday night... have you asked him that yet? I say don't give him an ultamdium on this one because chances are he may just walk away...I am assuming he is just as young as you and guys in their early 20s do NOT think a lot of the time... but if you let him know how important this is to you and he still does something else then time to re-evaulate your relationship...

Agreed, I've had boyfriends do stupid shit like this before, by mistake, and the key for me was whether they cared about how it ended up making me feel.

For instance, when you told him that you were pissed about him going golfing on your birthday, you say he didnt really have a response, does this mean he didn't seem to care? To me, if he realized what he'd done and felt badly and swore to make it up to me, I'd be fine, but if he seemed to be unphased by the issue, that would be a dealbreaker for me.

[Tenshi28]

Here is some advice...you are only 22 and you will have many and other more important birthdays in the future...he is clearly choosing to do the golfing thing but I don't thing his intention is to piss you off... maybe he has something special planned for that Saturday night... have you asked him that yet? I say don't give him an ultamdium on this one because chances are he may just walk away...I am assuming he is just as young as you and guys in their early 20s do NOT think a lot of the time... but if you let him know how important this is to you and he still does something else then time to re-evaulate your relationship...

This seems like wise advice to me.

[workaholic?]

okay...first...he's 25...i'll be 22. so, he's a little older than i am.

second, i'm not even close to considering breaking up over this issue. yes, my birthday sort of means a lot to me, but he means more.

third, when he realized his mistake in telling the guy he'd go golfing with him, he said maybe they could just play sort of early and just play nine holes...i just don't get why going golfing is SO important...like he can't do that anytime. i dunno...whatever.

and last, we're leaving the day after my birthday for a little mini-getaway to Fredericksburg, TX for Oktoberfest that weekend. So, i do understand that he'll be spending the weekend with me, but at the same time...i got the hotel for the weekend with my rewards points for hilton honors, so it's not like he's gone out of his way to plan this amazing birthday trip for me.

and i mean...i guess it just bothers me because on HIS birthday, he had been away and came home that afternoon, and i had gotten him some great gifts (that weren't cheap, but weren't crazy expensive either...it was more about the fact that i'd gone to the auto parts store by myself and gotten him a couple of really cool and useful things), i cooked a big dinner for him, and got him a cake. i went to a lot of trouble to celebrate his birthday and it seems like mine's just an afterthought...something he has to deal with just because he's supposed to care.