Trouble finding single women

[Still Looking]

Any ideas on where and how to meet decent single women? I'm sick of the bar / club scene and would really like to meet someone and have a decent conversation without her being sloshed! Perhaps online dating?????

[dddork]

online.. you'll find the rejected ones there.. hmm

[CTGirl]

online.. you'll find the rejected ones there.. hmm

ouch!

Dont get started on this argument again, you didn't win it last time.

[Chameleon]

online.. you'll find the rejected ones there.. hmm
dddork, I think you grossly overestimate your charm and sense of humor.

Still Looking, there are a bunch of threads on this, including one started by Mr. Sensitive above. Online is an option used by lots of folks on the board, many have suggested joining a sports/recreational league, pursuing a hobby, volunteering, at church; basically any activity that gets you off the couch and out among other human beings.

[wordsmith]

dddork for some reason wants to endear himself to the same people online he professes to not touch with a ten foot pole. :rolleyes:

[dddork]

I wasn't trying to be funny, mate.. Everyone is entitled to have their own opinion.. Mine are based on my experience..

I said something that I believed in and its up to "Looking .." to take my advice or not.

so thankyou and come again..

PS: I know I am generalizing here.. and there must be a plenty of woman who are absolutely fantastic and are into online dating.. but I am yet to find one.. Okay.. may be CTGirl.. she seems like a fun person..

[dddork]

dddork for some reason wants to endear himself to the same people online he professes to not touch with a ten foot pole. :rolleyes:

coz this is different.. we met on QLC and you guys seem to be fun to talk to..

[SmilesSoSweet]

coz this is different.. we met on QLC and you guys seem to be fun to talk to..

QLC IS online. Online dating doesn't necessarily have to come from a specific dating website.

I think there are actually people on here that have dated each on in person, but you would still refer to them as meeting "online", since QLC is an online website.

[WorkInProgress]

QLC IS online. Online dating doesn't necessarily have to come from a specific dating website.

You'd think that would be obvious, but apparently not.

[SmilesSoSweet]

You'd think that would be obvious, but apparently not.

Yeah, no shit! LOL

[dddork]

but the intention of coming to this site was hopefully not to date other people..

I am sure "Looking .. " is referring to online dating sites..

but anyways, I cause trouble everytime I open my mouth..

[CTGirl]

PS: I know I am generalizing here.. and there must be a plenty of woman who are absolutely fantastic and are into online dating.. but I am yet to find one.. Okay.. may be CTGirl.. she seems like a fun person..

Aww, well gee thanks :razz:

I do use online dating, and enjoy it, and have had some success at it, and I would not consider myself a "rejected one" in any way, nor am I anywhere near 350 lbs as you mentioned on the other thread, so there

[dddork]

200-350 same thing..

you know what I am gonna get into trouble for this too..

[and1grad]

200-350 same thing..

you know what I am gonna get into trouble for this too..
Thats kind of what you want tho, right? Get people riled up?

[Jedi of Zen]

At the risk of getting my own skin in trouble, I would seriously relax, people, in regards to dddork's comments. I think all he - and Still Looking - were really saying is that it's hard to meet interesting women sometimes.

So back to the original question - I would agree with Chameleon - anything that gets you out of your apartment, out of your own head, and around other people is almost always a good thing. Many times it still seems damn near impossible, despite repeated and sincere efforts towards doing so, and beyond that, I myself really don't have a clear answer.

[CTGirl]

200-350 same thing..

you know what I am gonna get into trouble for this too..

lol, I weigh 130 for your information :razz:

and yeah, as for the purpose of this thread, I agree, just get out and talk to new people. One thing that people often forget about is that making new friends is a good way to meet potential dates too - like if you meet a girl, but she's not interested in dating you, dont just blow her off, cuz she may be interested in "recommending you to a friend" ;)

[dddork]

Before someone else says it.. Lets just get a room..

[Still Looking]

dddork - easy man, don't be so harsh on the women here!

I think I will take the advice of others and try the whole Barnes and Noble, Best Buy, church, etc.

Getting out of the house is not the problem. I think the problem knowing where to find the decent ones. Most women around the city here are either stuck up and snobby or already involved.

[Still Looking]

Oh yeah, I forgot about Target.....there's always some cuties there! Although I do not know what kind of conversation I would have with someone there.

[LaFille]

i think the best way to meet single guys or girls is through your friends/family/aquaintances. i know some great guys and girls i would love to introduce to other nice eligible people.

[SunDevil]

The problem with Target, B&N, Best Buy, and church is, unless you know them, or have been stalking them, you can't be positive they aren't in a relationship already. Technically, if you are good at flirting, it won't matter, because the first thing you talk about will have nothing to do with dating or relationships, then in the course of the conversation you hope to find out that info, and if everything works out in your favor up until that point then you can ask them out.

From this survey, you have a 50/50 shot. (20/20 (TV show) recreated this survey a few years ago and found the same thing)
http://www.astro.umd.edu/~avondale/extra/Humor/SexAndLove/Survey.html

[wordsmith]

You don't really every know if somebody's available, unless they are married and happen to be wearing a ring. What's the worst thing that happens if you do show an interest in somebody, and find out that they're already in a relationship? Big deal. Yeah, back to the drawing board, but what are you really out?

[dengeist]

You don't really every know if somebody's available, unless they are married and happen to be wearing a ring. What's the worst thing that happens if you do show an interest in somebody, and find out that they're already in a relationship? Big deal. Yeah, back to the drawing board, but what are you really out?


Co-sign.

extralettersextraletters

[The X]

You don't really every know if somebody's available, unless they are married and happen to be wearing a ring. What's the worst thing that happens if you do show an interest in somebody, and find out that they're already in a relationship? Big deal. Yeah, back to the drawing board, but what are you really out?
It takes a lot of bravery to talk to a girl. Then when you find out she has a boyfriend? I get devestated.

[wordsmith]

Devastated, really?

I get disappointed if I hit it off with somebody and he's not interested/is taken. But i just can't manage devastated with somebody I barely know.

[CTGirl]

Devastated, really?

I get disappointed if I hit it off with somebody and he's not interested/is taken. But i just can't manage devastated with somebody I barely know.

Exactly, and just because that person is taken doesnt mean they wont have single friends to introduce you to instead.

I think the people that have the most success at this stuff are the ones who arent going into the conversation looking for a date, they're just looking to talk to someone, and if something develops in that direction, great, if a friendship develops, thats cool too.

I can tell when a guy is just looking to hook up with me by starting a conversation with me, and those guys arent going to have as much luck with me as the guys who just seem interested in talking to me regardless of the outcome (less desperation)

[The X]

Exactly, and just because that person is taken doesnt mean they wont have single friends to introduce you to instead.

I think the people that have the most success at this stuff are the ones who arent going into the conversation looking for a date, they're just looking to talk to someone, and if something develops in that direction, great, if a friendship develops, thats cool too.

I can tell when a guy is just looking to hook up with me by starting a conversation with me, and those guys arent going to have as much luck with me as the guys who just seem interested in talking to me regardless of the outcome (less desperation)
Good points, I don't normally ever talk to a girl trying to "hook up", however sometimes I end up being friends with a girl, not knowing her that well, then develop a crush, then months later she springs out of nowhere "me and my boyfriend . . . " that's when I get devestated.

[wordsmith]

Who conceals for months from a friend that they have a boyfriend? Ack!

[WorkInProgress]

Who conceals for months from a friend that they have a boyfriend? Ack!

Um, yeah. I mean, I could see if she didn't have one when your friendship began, but still. It's weird.

[CTGirl]

Good points, I don't normally ever talk to a girl trying to "hook up", however sometimes I end up being friends with a girl, not knowing her that well, then develop a crush, then months later she springs out of nowhere "me and my boyfriend . . . " that's when I get devestated.

This can be tough, cuz most men have a hard time distinguishing between a woman acting friendly toward them and flirting with them.

In my experience, the best way to handle this is to just assume that people are taken, or only interested in being friends, and look to be friendly with them anyhow, and if they turn out to be single and interested in you, then cool!

[WorkInProgress]

This can be tough, cuz most men have a hard time distinguishing between a woman acting friendly toward them and flirting with them.

I think that probably most people of both genders have this issue.

[The X]

This can be tough, cuz most men have a hard time distinguishing between a woman acting friendly toward them and flirting with them.

In my experience, the best way to handle this is to just assume that people are taken, or only interested in being friends, and look to be friendly with them anyhow, and if they turn out to be single and interested in you, then cool!
You're right, but sometimes I can't help getting a crush on a girl, it's not something I do on purpose.

[CTGirl]

I think that probably most people of both genders have this issue.

True, I wasnt trying to pick on men, just going with the theme of the discussion. I do think, however, that women tend to be more complex in our "signlas" so we may make it harder, in general.

[SmilesSoSweet]

I think that probably most people of both genders have this issue.

I would have to agree. I have no idea if a guy show any interest in me. I just assume that he's just being nice. I don't read signs too well.

[and1grad]

I'm actually really good at picking up on the signal well after its too late to actually act on it. Its kinda like coming up with the perfect comeback...the next day. :frustrate

[asm198]

It kinda makes me feel weird that, because I'm taken, that I'm automatically not worth talking to.

[dddork]

I have never been friends with a girl.. Its matter of showing Statement of Intent.. if you are attracted to her.. make it clear that you are attracted to her, just dont be disrespectful.. You need to touch her while you are talking to her.. Don't try to get into friends zone. Don't try to solve her problems.. don't pay compliments until she deserves them.. Play with her hair when you get a chance.. I mean make it effin' clear that you are a MAN.. and have hormones boiling inside you to make her feel like a woman.. If god made man and woman, he made it for a reason.. If he just wanted us to be mates, he could have just made men or women..

[CTGirl]

I have never been friends with a girl.. Its matter of showing Statement of Intent.. if you are attracted to her.. make it clear that you are attracted to her, just dont be disrespectful.. You need to touch her while you are talking to her.. Don't try to get into friends zone. Don't try to solve her problems.. don't pay compliments until she deserves them.. Play with her hair when you get a chance.. I mean make it effin' clear that you are a MAN.. and have hormones boiling inside you to make her feel like a woman.. If god made man and woman, he made it for a reason.. If he just wanted us to be mates, he could have just made men or women..

wow, what absolutely terrible advice.

I have always had a lot of male friends, and think its ridiculous not to be friends with the opposite sex.

[wordsmith]

Ohhh, God. Do I even DARE to ask what, praytell, a woman does to "earn" a compliment? I think not.

By the way, if you play with my hair and I don't know you, I will break your wrist. Boil your hormones on that.

[winneythepooh7]

I have never been friends with a girl.. Its matter of showing Statement of Intent.. if you are attracted to her.. make it clear that you are attracted to her, just dont be disrespectful.. You need to touch her while you are talking to her.. Don't try to get into friends zone. Don't try to solve her problems.. don't pay compliments until she deserves them.. Play with her hair when you get a chance.. I mean make it effin' clear that you are a MAN.. and have hormones boiling inside you to make her feel like a woman.. If god made man and woman, he made it for a reason.. If he just wanted us to be mates, he could have just made men or women..

I hope you are not serious with this post.

[WorkInProgress]

Perhaps it's because he's never been friends with a girl that he doesn't know this stuff.

[SmilesSoSweet]

I hope you are not serious with this post.

And if you are serious, no wonder you're having trouble meeting single women!

[asm198]

Ohhh, God. Do I even DARE to ask what, praytell, a woman does to "earn" a compliment? I think not.

By the way, if you play with my hair and I don't know you, I will break your wrist. Boil your hormones on that.

Ha! I was just getting ready to post exactly this. Don't touch my hair in any way. And really, being all touchy feely if I don't know you is very annoying. And newsflash, we 'girls' have heard you guys have hormones. We got that memo.

[Winter Storm]

I have never been friends with a girl.. Its matter of showing Statement of Intent.. if you are attracted to her.. make it clear that you are attracted to her, just dont be disrespectful.. You need to touch her while you are talking to her.. Don't try to get into friends zone. Don't try to solve her problems.. don't pay compliments until she deserves them.. Play with her hair when you get a chance.. I mean make it effin' clear that you are a MAN.. and have hormones boiling inside you to make her feel like a woman.. If god made man and woman, he made it for a reason.. If he just wanted us to be mates, he could have just made men or women..

I seriously hope this is a joke, despite that fact that it isn't a fraction of what I consider funny. In fact, this is the DUMBEST thing I've read this week. Have hormones boiling to make her feel like a woman? Don't pay compliments? Is that what you actually think it takes???

Seriously, if you really believe this tripe, you are beyond help here. I won't even wish you good luck. This is just sad coming from an "adult".

[wordsmith]

Eh, his marriage is arranged anyway. :huge:

[Winter Storm]

Eh, his marriage is arranged anyway. :huge:

Seriously, feel sorry for the future spouse. She'll have to deal with his raging hormones and annoying hair pulling. Oh and being a MAN!

:rolleyes: :0

[dddork]

wow, what absolutely terrible advice.

I have always had a lot of male friends, and think its ridiculous not to be friends with the opposite sex.

no don't take me wrong.. Its absolutely okay to be friends with opposite gender.. just not the ones you are attracted to!.. once you are in friends zone, you are in friends zone..

[dddork]

Ohhh, God. Do I even DARE to ask what, praytell, a woman does to "earn" a compliment? I think not.

By the way, if you play with my hair and I don't know you, I will break your wrist. Boil your hormones on that.

lot of guys.. just give girls a compliment.. like.. oh you look good.. oh thats a flattering smile you have, when she doesn't.. I am NOT saying that you don't give a girl a compliment.. You SHOULD.. Only when she deserves.. Don't say it when she doesn't..
You don't play with a person's hair when they don't know you.. You've gotto create a rapport.. have a bit of vibe..

anywasy, why do i even bother..

[dddork]

Perhaps it's because he's never been friends with a girl that he doesn't know this stuff.

thats true, I have never been friends with a woman I am attracted to!.. I end up either leaving her life of she ends up coming home.. I just can't handle person I am attracted to, flirting with someone else.. I'd rather be with her or take my mind off her..

[dddork]

And if you are serious, no wonder you're having trouble meeting single women!

save me.............. *sarcasm, if you didn't notice*

[dddork]

I seriously hope this is a joke, despite that fact that it isn't a fraction of what I consider funny. In fact, this is the DUMBEST thing I've read this week. Have hormones boiling to make her feel like a woman? Don't pay compliments? Is that what you actually think it takes???

Seriously, if you really believe this tripe, you are beyond help here. I won't even wish you good luck. This is just sad coming from an "adult".

OKAY.. may be I didn't put in a right way.. I didn't mean hormones boiling literally..

Here is the scenario.. Two guys and a girl. both of them are attracted to this girl and have known her.. (not friends).. standing in a bar..

Guy A: (the wannabe friend) --> Listens to her.. hopes she will be attracted to him.. is scared of what is gonna happen if he talks to her/touches her... and btw is a very nice friend.. goes out of the way to get a girl what she wants.. Tells her how beautiful she is..

Guy B: --> Listens to her.. touches her.. on arm.. may be back of the shoulder while having a conversation.. Doesn't offer any advices until she asks for it.. Mentions how sexy she looks in that black dress.. holds eye contact.. makes sure she knows that he is attracted to her..

[dddork]

Seriously, feel sorry for the future spouse. She'll have to deal with his raging hormones and annoying hair pulling. Oh and being a MAN!

:rolleyes: :0


I do too!.. actually.. She'd have a hard time.. Its gonna be a good adventure.

[CTGirl]

OKAY.. may be I didn't put in a right way.. I didn't mean hormones boiling literally..

Here is the scenario.. Two guys and a girl. both of them are attracted to this girl and have known her.. (not friends).. standing in a bar..

Guy A: (the wannabe friend) --> Listens to her.. hopes she will be attracted to him.. is scared of what is gonna happen if he talks to her/touches her... and btw is a very nice friend.. goes out of the way to get a girl what she wants.. Tells her how beautiful she is..

Guy B: --> Listens to her.. touches her.. on arm.. may be back of the shoulder while having a conversation.. Doesn't offer any advices until she asks for it.. Mentions how sexy she looks in that black dress.. holds eye contact.. makes sure she knows that he is attracted to her..

I dont really see much difference between these 2 guys aside from one being a little shy-er than the other......

[Winter Storm]

OKAY.. may be I didn't put in a right way.. I didn't mean hormones boiling literally..

Here is the scenario.. Two guys and a girl. both of them are attracted to this girl and have known her.. (not friends).. standing in a bar..

Guy A: (the wannabe friend) --> Listens to her.. hopes she will be attracted to him.. is scared of what is gonna happen if he talks to her/touches her... and btw is a very nice friend.. goes out of the way to get a girl what she wants.. Tells her how beautiful she is..

Guy B: --> Listens to her.. touches her.. on arm.. may be back of the shoulder while having a conversation.. Doesn't offer any advices until she asks for it.. Mentions how sexy she looks in that black dress.. holds eye contact.. makes sure she knows that he is attracted to her..

Guy A: sounds like a cool, understanding, easy to talk to dude, someone I'd consider dating.

Guy B: sounds like physical attraction may be his main interest in her, is also holding back and not offering more than sexual glances and come-ons: not a keeper.

The point is you can't pigeonhole all girls into wanting one kind of guy. Many of us don't.

But ya know, keep doing and thinking as you are, I'm sure its working out well for ya. ;):

[dddork]

I dont really see much difference between these 2 guys aside from one being a little shy-er than the other......

the first one is gonna be a good frnd..

the second is gonna go home with her..

[wordsmith]

I trust the guy who is a very nice friend over guy B, who may be a slimy sort who would be doing that same thing to whomever was standing there looking cute, it just happens to be me.

[CTGirl]

the first one is gonna be a good frnd..

the second is gonna go home with her..

dude, you are so off. I'd prolly be more likely to end up with the first guy in this situation, but really, those bits of behavior have very little to do with my decision.

[Winter Storm]

the first one is gonna be a good frnd..

the second is gonna go home with her..

Oh yeah and Guy A, the first one, is the guy I am currently dating and the one I invited back to my place later.

Just an FYI.

[cache]

By the way, if you play with my hair and I don't know you, I will break your wrist. Boil your hormones on that.

LMFAO!!!:lol::lol::lol:

[dddork]

Guy A: sounds like a cool, understanding, easy to talk to dude, someone I'd consider dating.

Guy B: sounds like physical attraction may be his main interest in her, is also holding back and not offering more than sexual glances and come-ons: not a keeper.

The point is you can't pigeonhole all girls into wanting one kind of guy. Many of us don't.

But ya know, keep doing and thinking as you are, I'm sure its working out well for ya. ;):

It depends what are you looking for/your personality type..
For someone who is aggressive/knows what he wants/clear sense of direction: 2nd one.
For someone who is stable/needs security/laid back: 1st one hands down..

[WorkInProgress]

I dont really see much difference between these 2 guys aside from one being a little shy-er than the other......

Me too. Mostly. And I tend to go for the shyer guys anyway. Ones who respect my (physical) space don't even try to start talking to me in terms of sex/sexiness until I know them well. Because those guys I figure really just want to get in my pants. Maybe it's me, though.

[dddork]

I trust the guy who is a very nice friend over guy B, who may be a slimy sort who would be doing that same thing to whomever was standing there looking cute, it just happens to be me.

he is not a friend yet.. he is a potentially a good frnd.. based on his actions..

[wordsmith]

Well, they're def. two diff. types, but I don't necessarily agree with your characteristics.

[cache]

the first one is gonna be a good frnd..

the second is gonna go home with her..

Quit reading books by guys who think it is an accomplishment to have slept with 100+ women, they are warping your sense of reality.

[wordsmith]

he is not a friend yet.. he is a potentially a good frnd.. based on his actions..

I've never dated a guy who I wasn't/wouldn't be friends with.

[WorkInProgress]

he is not a friend yet.. he is a potentially a good frnd.. based on his actions..
I'll bite. How do you figure that one?

[dddork]

dude, you are so off. I'd prolly be more likely to end up with the first guy in this situation, but really, those bits of behavior have very little to do with my decision.

nvm.....................

[dddork]

Well, they're def. two diff. types, but I don't necessarily agree with your characteristics.

elaborate.. a bittt

[vivo]

I luv this thread!

[WorkInProgress]

I luv this thread!
You're just happy it's not you. :razz:

[dddork]

Quit reading books by guys who think it is an accomplishment to have slept with 100+ women, they are warping your sense of reality.

I don't want to sleep with over 100 women, trust me.. I have just slept with one.. my 2 and half yrs of girl friend.. sleeping with them is not a GOAL.. its matter of understanding attraction.. I have a lot of frnds who are Guy A but they get the shaft all the time..

Okay in a girl, I rather have someone who isn't afraid to speak whats in her mind.. I want her to tell me, that she is attracted to me.. you know?

[dddork]

I've never dated a guy who I wasn't/wouldn't be friends with.

you've never come across a guy who'se blown you off your feet.

[LaFille]

OKAY.. may be I didn't put in a right way.. I didn't mean hormones boiling literally..

Here is the scenario.. Two guys and a girl. both of them are attracted to this girl and have known her.. (not friends).. standing in a bar..

Guy A: (the wannabe friend) --> Listens to her.. hopes she will be attracted to him.. is scared of what is gonna happen if he talks to her/touches her... and btw is a very nice friend.. goes out of the way to get a girl what she wants.. Tells her how beautiful she is..

Guy B: --> Listens to her.. touches her.. on arm.. may be back of the shoulder while having a conversation.. Doesn't offer any advices until she asks for it.. Mentions how sexy she looks in that black dress.. holds eye contact.. makes sure she knows that he is attracted to her..


i would be more attracted to whichever one seemes more 'himself.' because any guy can follow a set of rules, but i think that as women, we can tell who is really being true to his personality and who is following some sort of 'pick-up formula.'

by the way, neither guy A or B sounds very interesting or funny or anything. remind me not to go to THAT bar!

[dddork]

okay my question is:

Have you guys ever have this animal instinct where you see a man and you just want to be with him.. ever wanted to act like an animal?


If I say anything more with my limited vocab, I am gonna get in trouble.. but you know what i mean..

[WorkInProgress]

you've never come across a guy who'se blown you off your feet.
Are you kidding me?! You might want to step back.

I don't want to be with someone who wouldn't want to be my friend too either.

[CTGirl]

i would be more attracted to whichever one seemes more 'himself.' because any guy can follow a set of rules, but i think that as women, we can tell who is really being true to his personality and who is following some sort of 'pick-up formula.'

by the way, neither guy A or B sounds very interesting or funny or anything. remind me not to go to THAT bar!

Exactly. These "rules" you've got going here are the kind of thing that guys follow that get them nowhere with women.

We dont buy that crap, and we can usually smell it a mile away, we just want you to be you.

[dddork]

Are you kidding me?! You might want to step back.

I don't want to be with someone who wouldn't want to be my friend too either.

what did I do? I asked her a question..

[CTGirl]

okay my question is:

Have you guys ever have this animal instinct where you see a man and you just want to be with him.. ever wanted to act like an animal?


Well of course, but unless he's got a great personality, this sort of feeling isnt gonna get us too far.

[wordsmith]

you've never come across a guy who'se blown you off your feet.

Nope...pretty sure THAT'S not it.

[erika3536]

I know two different couples that are now happily married, a result of meeting on Match.com.

So don't knock it till you try it.

Has anyone every tried speed dating? It kind of freaks me out, but it does increase your chances of meeting someone, since you're meeting a new person every 6 minutes!

My vote is for a sports league or join a club, since you'll automatically have something in common.

[WorkInProgress]

Has anyone every tried speed dating? It kind of freaks me out, but it does increase your chances of meeting someone, since you're meeting a new person every 6 minutes!

I think it looks like fun.

[CTGirl]

Has anyone every tried speed dating? It kind of freaks me out, but it does increase your chances of meeting someone, since you're meeting a new person every 6 minutes!


Yeah, I think there are a couple other threads on that subject actually.

[LaFille]

you've never come across a guy who'se blown you off your feet.

i'm not quite sure exactly what you mean by that, but i there have been times when i have been incredible attracted to a guy on first meeting. but not if they have a shitty personality, that is for SURE. i've met guys who i thought were extremely hot and then realized their personality was severely lacking after talking to them. i need more than just visual stimulation.

[The X]

ddork is pretty much right, you girls know deep down inside he's right. You want to be swept off your feet. I'm type A and I get shafted all the time, girls honestly don't ever like the "nice" guy.

[wordsmith]

Some girls do.

The last guy who swept me off my feet was nice...and funny...and cool...and good-looking.

But if he'd had a shitty personality, he'd not have gotten half as far with me.

[vivo]

You're just happy it's not you. :razz:

maybe. sometimes it's fun to make girls mad though. :huge:

[wordsmith]

maybe. sometimes it's fun to make girls mad though. :huge:

Are you guys in 8th grade?

Don't confuse "rolling our eyes at you" with "mad."

[WorkInProgress]

maybe. sometimes it's fun to make girls mad though. :huge:

Fun like poking at a hornet nest.

[CTGirl]

ddork is pretty much right, you girls know deep down inside he's right. You want to be swept off your feet. I'm type A and I get shafted all the time, girls honestly don't ever like the "nice" guy.

Maybe for girls in high school :googly:

While I will say that most girls do prefer to be pursued, the things that ddork has been saying are not generally good guidelines to follow.

[Winter Storm]

ddork is pretty much right, you girls know deep down inside he's right. You want to be swept off your feet. I'm type A and I get shafted all the time, girls honestly don't ever like the "nice" guy.

This is wack and we've had this overextended convo on here before. Not getting into it today. I happen to be dating the "nice" guy, similar to Guy A. And who is to say the Guy A can't still sweep the girl off her feet? I was more impressed with this one that all the other Guy Bs.

If you believe you get shafted cause you are nice, then you should take a good, hard look at yourself and question why being just nice would get you passed up. I can provide one answer and that is because it takes a whole helluva lot more than "nice" to impress, attract and keep a girl.

There's your start.

[The X]

This is wack and we've had this overextended convo on here before. Not getting into it today. I happen to be dating the "nice" guy, similar to Guy A. And who is to say the Guy A can't still sweep the girl off her feet? I was more impressed with this one that all the other Guy Bs.

If you believe you get shafted cause you are nice, then you should take a good, hard look at yourself and question why being just nice would get you passed up. I can provide one answer and that is because it takes a whole helluva lot more than "nice" to impress, attract and keep a girl.

There's your start.
I am nice, I don't see why type B isn't a nice guy either, but you're all saying he is coming on too strong, I am calling bs on that. I don't see what ddork said as rude or offensive, just a fact.

[vivo]

Fun like poking at a hornet nest.

I'm not into that kindof stuff.

[LaFille]

ddork is pretty much right, you girls know deep down inside he's right. You want to be swept off your feet. I'm type A and I get shafted all the time, girls honestly don't ever like the "nice" guy.


oh please... 'nice guys' like to blame women and their horrible taste in men for the fact that they're not getting any. and i don't think it's very 'nice' to do that. why doesn't it occur to you guys to look at the kind of women you're pursuing?

[WorkInProgress]

This is wack and we've had this overextended convo on here before. Not getting into it today. I happen to be dating the "nice" guy, similar to Guy A. And who is to say the Guy A can't still sweep the girl off her feet? I was more impressed with this one that all the other Guy Bs.

If you believe you get shafted cause you are nice, then you should take a good, hard look at yourself and question why being just nice would get you passed up. I can provide one answer and that is because it takes a whole helluva lot more than "nice" to impress, attract and keep a girl.

There's your start.

You are on a roll today. Ditto this. Except that I'm with neither A nor B right now. Have been with As in the past and turned down a few Bs.

[vivo]

Is it possible that some people here are misinterpreting some things you say because of your low skill w/English? (Sorry, didn't say it in a nice enough way)

[cache]

Sorry, you MEN on this board are abslutely WRONG. Period. Women don't go for nice guys IN A BAR! That may be the only place the nice guy is at a disadvantage. Good thing life isn't lived in a bar. And yeah, sure some women fall for it, but are those women truly the ones you are interested in anyways?


Join a sports league or volunteer somewhere and see how far hair touching and boiling hormones will get you.

[dddork]

I am nice, I don't see why type B isn't a nice guy either, but you're all saying he is coming on too strong, I am calling bs on that. I don't see what ddork said as rude or offensive, just a fact.

THANKYOU!!..

[Winter Storm]

I am nice, I don't see why type B isn't a nice guy either, but you're all saying he is coming on too strong, I am calling bs on that. I don't see what ddork said as rude or offensive, just a fact.

Type B isn't that nice because he is focusing on sexual attraction and not much else. Really, there wasnt much depth there but it was a very breif description. Maybe he volunteers with orphan on weekends, but it wasn't mentioned so he seems to fill a typical type.

What dddork said is opinion, not fact and a misguided one too. The type of girls who fall for the type Bs are the younger, immature ones who have yet to value the characteristics of a gentleman with a kind heart.

[dddork]

Is it possible that some people here are misinterpreting some things you say because of your low skill w/English? (Sorry, didn't say it in a nice enough way)

I am sure that they are misterpretation.. .. I have a hard time expressing myself in words.. !! but at the same time.. the gist is right.. I don't have a great vocab so sometimes it does come off cheap, which it isn't meant to be!.. I am very good expressing myself in front of people using expressions/hand gestures as such! and don't be sorry

[vivo]

This is wack and we've had this overextended convo on here before. Not getting into it today. I happen to be dating the "nice" guy, similar to Guy A. And who is to say the Guy A can't still sweep the girl off her feet? I was more impressed with this one that all the other Guy Bs.

If you believe you get shafted cause you are nice, then you should take a good, hard look at yourself and question why being just nice would get you passed up. I can provide one answer and that is because it takes a whole helluva lot more than "nice" to impress, attract and keep a girl.

There's your start.

Excuse me hunny, but the only thing WACK on this thread is you! :huge:

[dddork]

Maybe for girls in high school :googly:

While I will say that most girls do prefer to be pursued, the things that ddork has been saying are not generally good guidelines to follow.

like men, girls like a good challenge too.. Anything that comes off too easy is not ever valued!

[Winter Storm]

Excuse me hunny, but the only thing WACK on this thread is you! :huge:

Elaborate!

[cache]

I am very good expressing myself in front of people using expressions/hand gestures as such!

So, in person would you be flipping us off?

[CTGirl]

Sorry, you MEN on this board are abslutely WRONG. Period. Women don't go for nice guys IN A BAR! That may be the only place the nice guy is at a disadvantage. Good thing life isn't lived in a bar. And yeah, sure some women fall for it, but are those women truly the ones you are interested in anyways?


Join a sports league or volunteer somewhere and see how far hair touching and boiling hormones will get you.

Well said.

I am also kinda dating a "nice guy" right now myself :razz:

P.S. the guys on here can say what they want, but it seems to me that the girls here probably have a better idea of what girls are looking for in a bf than you do

[CTGirl]

like men, girls like a good challenge too.. Anything that comes off too easy is not ever valued!

ugh, so so so wrong :googly:

[vivo]

Are you guys in 8th grade?

Don't confuse "rolling our eyes at you" with "mad."

well maybe not mad. but annoyed at least?

[dddork]

So, in person would you be flipping us off?

lol no.. I don't think anything you guys said to me was offensive or rude.. You guys are stating your opinions and I am mine!.. Its like having a good argument.. My opinions are based on my experience.. I am 23 yrs old so the girls I have dealt with or known are usually a little younger than may be this crowd..I might be wrong and its okay.. but at the same time just because you girls say, "girls like nice guys", I am not going to believe it until I see it from my own eyes..

tip to men on QLC: girls like confident/adventrous/spontaneous men.. don't be yourself.. be your best self.. dont try to be a frnd with someone you are attracted to because you are doing injustice to your feelings.. Let them know... Don't wait for her to come back after she's screwed around a million guys..

[LaFille]

Let them know... Don't wait for her to come back after she's screwed around a million guys..

"...but in the meantime, try to screw a million girls..."

[and1grad]

If you believe you get shafted cause you are nice, then you should take a good, hard look at yourself and question why being just nice would get you passed up. I can provide one answer and that is because it takes a whole helluva lot more than "nice" to impress, attract and keep a girl.

There's your start.
Co-sign that. If "nice" is the only way you can be described, you're doing something wrong and you will NOT get the girl.

[The X]

Well said.

I am also kinda dating a "nice guy" right now myself :razz:

P.S. the guys on here can say what they want, but it seems to me that the girls here probably have a better idea of what girls are looking for in a bf than you do
"kinda"

You'd be full on going out if he would sweep you off your feet!

[and1grad]

ugh, so so so wrong :googly:
ACTUALLY he's right about that one. No girl wants a pushover or a yes man.

[vivo]

Elaborate!

wait, that was a sarcastic response to my sarcastic statement, right?

[dddork]

"...but in the meantime, try to screw a million girls..."

lol. nah.. but may be try to be with someone who is more worth it.. and respects your feeling.. I hate when men stay around with girls that they are trying to have a relationship with and whine about how she is talking about other boys.. flirting with other boys.. I feel like smacking them.. saying"GO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT".

[CTGirl]

ACTUALLY he's right about that one. No girl wants a pushover or a yes man.

there's a difference between being a pushover and not making things difficult.

I dont date a guy because he's a challenge for me to get with, and I don't turn guys down who make things easy for me.

[LaFille]

ACTUALLY he's right about that one. No girl wants a pushover or a yes man.

yeah, we want guys with strong personalities. but that doesn't translate into 'asshole.'

[CTGirl]

"kinda"

You'd be full on going out if he would sweep you off your feet!

Perhaps, but as it stands, I'm letting him take his time, and not dating the "sweep me off my feet" guys that I could be dating right now instead.

[SmilesSoSweet]

anywasy, why do i even bother..


yes, why do you even bother! :rolleyes:

[and1grad]

there's a difference between being a pushover and not making things difficult.

I dont date a guy because he's a challenge for me to get with, and I don't turn guys down who make things easy for me.
But being a challenge isnt about making life harder for someone. Its about not being a doormat and just agreeing with everything a girl says b/c you think she's pretty. A lot of "nice" guys fall into that trap.

[dddork]

yeah, we want guys with strong personalities. but that doesn't translate into 'asshole.'

who said asshole.. I meant a guy, who knows what he wants and knows how to get it. who isn't afraid to speak his minds.. who isn't afraid to know how he feels about you.. who wont say yes, when you say yes.. he will have a mind of his own.. he will have his own morals.. he will have his own life..

[Winter Storm]

wait, that was a sarcastic response to my sarcastic statement, right?
Uh, no!

I'm waiting for you to ELABORATE on how the only thing WACK on this thread is me.

[LaFille]

who said asshole.. I meant a guy, who knows what he wants and knows how to get it. who isn't afraid to speak his minds.. who isn't afraid to know how he feels about you.. who wont say yes, when you say yes.. he will have a mind of his own.. he will have his own morals.. he will have his own life..

ok then, well i think a guy can be all of those things and still be 'nice...'


which by the way, is the worst word in the english language to describe someone. it's so white bread. :huge:

[dddork]

usually nice guys lack those qualities..

[The X]

Perhaps, but as it stands, I'm letting him take his time, and not dating the "sweep me off my feet" guys that I could be dating right now instead.
So you're stringing him along . . .

[CTGirl]

But being a challenge isnt about making life harder for someone. Its about not being a doormat and just agreeing with everything a girl says b/c you think she's pretty. A lot of "nice" guys fall into that trap.

I definitely agree with you. My initial point was in response to the statement that guys should be playing hard to get so that they present a challenge, because women only want things that are a challenge to acquire - and that I disagree with.

[Winter Storm]

who said asshole.. I meant a guy, who knows what he wants and knows how to get it. who isn't afraid to speak his minds.. who isn't afraid to know how he feels about you.. who wont say yes, when you say yes.. he will have a mind of his own.. he will have his own morals.. he will have his own life..

I think your idea of what women want is some sort of cartoonish, macho, Arnold Schwarznegger-type with bulging muscles and a heavy square jaw.

I think its funny, but it really doesn't have to be that extreme.

[CTGirl]

So you're stringing him along . . .

How am I stringing him along?

He initiated the relationship, and he said he wanted to take it slow, and I'm turning down other offers to let him take his time. If anyone is stringing someone along, he's doing it to me, not the other way around.

[WorkInProgress]

which by the way, is the worst word in the english language to describe someone. it's so white bread. :huge:

That's the point. If all a person is is "nice," why bother?

[vivo]

Uh, no!

I'm waiting for you to ELABORATE on how the only thing WACK on this thread is me.

oh, sorry I was joking.

[Winter Storm]

usually nice guys lack those qualities..

And know I also think you equate nice with loser, wimp or dork.

A guy can be nice, sexy, fun, exciting, sensual and attractive. But when you've got all that going on, you aren't labeled 'nice'. Cause you have more going on than just that.

[cache]

How disappointing that I am going to lunch now and have to miss this intriguing debate. Save me a seat, though...

[Winter Storm]

oh, sorry I was joking.
Yeah, I bet you were.

[WorkInProgress]

But being a challenge isnt about making life harder for someone. Its about not being a doormat and just agreeing with everything a girl says b/c you think she's pretty.

Yay! Because yesman=so boring I'd rather be alone all my life.

[vivo]

Yeah, I bet you were.
I was. The smiley face was supposed to convey that.

[Winter Storm]

I was. The smiley face was supposed to convey that.

Pffff. Smiley face my ass.

[dddork]

And know I also think you equate nice with loser, wimp or dork.

A guy can be nice, sexy, fun, exciting, sensual and attractive. But when you've got all that going on, you aren't labeled 'nice'. Cause you have more going on than just that.

My point.. being "nice" is just a part of whole package.. no girls want a nice guy.. they want guys with all those qualities.. but who is nice tooo (by nice I mean, doesn't treat other people badly, respect her family/friends etc)

[and1grad]

Yay! Because yesman=so boring I'd rather be alone all my life.
No you wouldnt! You'd love you some yesman wouldnt you? Such a work in progress, this one. ;)

[vivo]

Excuse me hunny, but the only thing WACK on this thread is you! :huge:

I did use one.

[LaFille]

usually nice guys lack those qualities..

well then there you go! maybe they should cultivate some other qualities than their 'niceness!' sheesh! in my experience, most of these 'nice guys' whose only clame to fame is their 'niceness' aren't even that 'nice' in the first place. they're just uninteresting, and since they see themselves as being 'nice' they've made up this myth that women do not like nice guys and continue to be bitter about it!

i know PLENTY of nice guys who get girls. but they aren't wimpy pathetic guys who let girls walk all over them either. they're cool and funny and interesting and smart! NICE IS NOT ENOUGH! :eek:

[wordsmith]

But being a challenge isnt about making life harder for someone. Its about not being a doormat and just agreeing with everything a girl says b/c you think she's pretty. A lot of "nice" guys fall into that trap.

Why IS that?

I'm nice, and I SURE as hell don't agree with everything people say.

[WorkInProgress]

No you wouldnt! You'd love you some yesman wouldnt you? Such a work in progress, this one. ;)

Of course. A mindless zombie of a guy who doens't think for himself is sooooo hot, you know.

And I'm sure you're looking for some yeswoman. ;) You know, because that's hot too.

[dddork]

well then there you go! maybe they should cultivate some other qualities than their 'niceness!' sheesh! in my experience, most of these 'nice guys' whose only clame to fame is their 'niceness' aren't even that 'nice' in the first place. they're just uninteresting, and since they see themselves as being 'nice' they've made up this myth that women do not like nice guys and continue to be bitter about it!

i know PLENTY of nice guys who get girls. but they aren't wimpy pathetic guys who let girls walk all over them either. they're cool and funny and interesting and smart! NICE IS NOT ENOUGH! :eek:

Nice is never enough.. you need to have a personality.. an aura about yourself.. confidence and a not caring attitude(i don't have to agree to everything you say.. kinda attitude).. i am my own person

[CTGirl]

Nice is never enough.. you need to have a personality.. an aura about yourself.. confidence and a not caring attitude(i don't have to agree to everything you say.. kinda attitude).. i am my own person

There ya go, now that's a comment that I can agree with :razz:

[WorkInProgress]

There ya go, now that's a comment that I can agree with :razz:

It only took 10 pages.

[and1grad]

Of course. A mindless zombie of a guy who doens't think for himself is sooooo hot, you know.

And I'm sure you're looking for some yeswoman. ;) You know, because that's hot too.
HA! As argumentative as I am? I'd drive a yeswoman out of her mind.

Why IS that?

I'm nice, and I SURE as hell don't agree with everything people say.
B/c guys are dumb and we believe catering to everything a woman does and says will get us in their good graces and make them like us. Its a confidence thing.

[Winter Storm]

I did use one.
And I don't care.

Smiley face or not, you got something to say about me, then I got something else for ya.

[J-girl]

Seriously, feel sorry for the future spouse. She'll have to deal with his raging hormones and annoying hair pulling. Oh and being a MAN!

:rolleyes: :0
OMG you guys are killing me!!!

[vivo]

And I don't care.

Smiley face or not, you got something to say about me, then I got something else for ya.
but i was kidding!

[The X]

but i was kidding!
You got a problem with her? You're gonna go through me.

[vivo]

You got a problem with her? You're gonna go through me.
what's that? you a tough guy or somethin'?

[The X]

what's that? you a tough guy or somethin'?
Yeah because I know girls don't really want a "nice guy".

[cache]

Nice is never enough.. you need to have .. an aura about yourself..

An aura? Now, is that something I can go get at Sears, or is it only available online?


...sorry everyone, I can't take any of dddork's posts seriously.



Shoot, I said "sorry", now I am never going to get the girl...

[vivo]

Yeah because I know girls don't really want a "nice guy".

according to what i've read on this thread and others, women want a nice guy along with some other stuff. and nice means a decent human being. I wonder if this were for real and I was a thief with a knife and u were with your gf, how it would look to your gf if you confronted the thief?

[dddork]

An aura? Now, is that something I can go get at Sears, or is it only available online?


...sorry everyone, I can't take any of dddork's posts seriously.



Shoot, I said "sorry", now I am never going to get the girl...

I lol'ed.. anyways.. yup.. cache.. its in sears/wallmart/target.. actually every big chain carries it

[The X]

according to what i've read on this thread and others, women want a nice guy along with some other stuff. and nice means a decent human being. I wonder if this were for real and I was a thief with a knife and u were with your gf, how it would look to your gf if you confronted the thief?
They want some superman. I am wondering if you don't want us to hit on you how will we ever go past being just friends?

[LaFille]

They want some superman.
as if guys don't have superhuman standards for the women they want?!?

[The X]

as if guys don't have superhuman standards for the women they want?!?
I think a lot of guys will take what they can get actually.

[CTGirl]

They want some superman. I am wondering if you don't want us to hit on you how will we ever go past being just friends?

Who said girls didnt want to be hit on???

[The X]

Who said girls didnt want to be hit on???
Well you don't want type B . . . that was just a guy hitting on a girl or am I mistaken?

[ScottyTheBody]

You know, I want to believe that Guy A is more what women go for, and from the responses on this board, I would believe that that's true. However, my experiences would suggest otherwise. My very first thread touched on this exact material.

I was always told just be yourself and someone would really like you for you. So, I was myself, which is kind, intelligent, somewhat shy, attractive, compassionate, great listener, responsible, reliable and honest. I was myself for 19 years and I didn't get a single date, I never kissed anyone, and when I showed interest I always got passed on as a "friend". I'd help people out of their problems without asking for anything in return, made a lot of great friends and tons of acquaintances. I am today and always have been quite altruistic.

Whenever I'd ask one of these female friends of mine out on a date or show some interest beyond friendships, I'd get nothing in return. At first I thought, it's just everybody else, the women I'm attracted to or just terrible luck or maybe, I was just physically unappealing. With each woman, I dealt with it and then asked 'why'?

Sometimes they would be too afraid to respond with an honest answer, like they'd say "I don't feel like getting in a relationship right now", yet days later, they'd be all over some new guy. On some occasions though, I got honest answers, they'd say "Your kind, considerate, so smart, a great guy, very attractive, hilarious and you helped me in more ways than I can think and I just feel horrible for saying this but there's just that thing missing, I don't know, that chemistry I guess...".

After asking about women to my guy friends who were in/had relationships with women, they told me stuff very similar to what dddork's response was to what women want in men. So I changed who I was when I went to university (or at least tried), I tried being well, a little "selfish" and a little aloof, disrespectful and "confident" to a point where it appeared cocky. I asked women out, I got dates, could put on this "act" for a while and then I became "me" again.

Eventually I would listen to her and her problems, fix her problems, be there for her for whenever she needed me. Then, I became well "boring" as they put it. They would know that if they needed me, I'd be there. I'd always do the hardest, most difficult "right" thing. It was no longer interesting because my actions would be very predictable and thus not very spontaneous. Things like, if she was lonely, I'd drop whatever I was doing and be there for her, cheer her up and make her laugh. If she needed help with her homework, I'd be there helping her along every step of the way. She wouldn't think any lower of me and still think that I'm funny and a great guy but just that "spark" as they put it would be gone. If she needed me she knew I'd be there, she wouldn't be afraid of me, she could trust me and she wouldn't wonder where I was, because I'd be off helping some random stranger with their homework in the library, working on my own homework in the library or at home or off fighting some social injustice with all of my heart. I was/am accomadating, predicatable, responsible and reliable rather than spontaneous, carefree and mysterious. I would get a few dates and then they would just fizzle.

This was around the time that I ran into these boards and made my first post/rant after several strings of dates starting and ending in the exact same manner.

Then I realized, that dating shouldn't be some game. It shouldn't be me playing some character, who isn't me, to trick women into being attracted to me (especially when I want a relationship and not NSA sex). I should be honest to others and myself and just be who I am.

So, this is where I am. Who I am is kind of an introvert, a little quiet, calm, quick witted, honest, considerate, humble, kind, polite, open-minded, strong-willed, compassionate, intelligent, altruistic, responsible, attractive, reliable and great guy. I'm told that being "nice" is good but women need more, and true enough. I am much more and from what I've been told, I'm a "great catch" and definitely not just another "nice" guy (because I've asked this), I guess just not great enough.

Or maybe, its just that I don't know when to turn a standard conversation into something sexual in nature. Maybe I take things much too slowly and they lose interest.

I've also been told that its just my age group. Its the fact that so many 19-22 year olds just aren't mature enough yet which could be possible too, its just hard to believe that eveyone else is the problem and its not me.

Whoever said "you can't just be you, you have to be your best you", is from my observations, the most accurate for me. It seems like the only way that I've ever been to attract anyone was when I was ON. When I was on the ball, at my wittiest, with great stories and great jokes and when I'm alone with that person. As soon as I relax, as soon as I'm having a normal day or worse, a bad day, whatever I had, "it" is over and I get "friended" because I'm still a great guy just not one with a lot of "sparks".

I don't blame anyone, because well, you can't change how you feel and I definitely don't have any hatred towards women, because many are great to me and wonderful people.

I guess I'm just frustrated right now and I'm getting impatient because I'm 21 and I've never had a real relationship before and there appears to be no solution except the one that is infeasible.

[CTGirl]

Well you don't want type B . . . that was just a guy hitting on a girl or am I mistaken?

the "types" in the example were very vague, so I think that caused a lot of confusion. What I think the women here were trying to get at was that the sleazy, guy who comes across very aggressively is not what we're looking for, and that the guy who can act more like a friend is more likely to get further. This does not mean that we don't like being hit on though, it just works better if you come across as being interested in more than just sex.

[cache]

They want some superman. I am wondering if you don't want us to hit on you how will we ever go past being just friends?

From a man's perspective...stop thinking about it! Just be yourself, be genuine. If there is attraction or something more, it will come out. Then move things forward. This has worked many times for me, and every time I am amazed. But, it works. As long as you know that point when you need to show you are interested in more than a friendship.

Have more to say, but gotta run....

[CTGirl]

As long as you know that point when you need to show you are interested in more than a friendship.


Exactly, and Scotty, this may be where you're having trouble.

Girls do want all the "nice guy" stuff, but at the same time, if you wanna get past being "just friends" you have to let us know that. This does not mean that you have to make all the moves on us though. For example, I dated a guy who was really shy, but because he hinted at sexual things, and made it clear to me that he was interested in going in that direction, I had no problem taking the lead and getting the ball rolling. The problem comes in when a guy doesn't make that clear. Most girls are willing to make the first move, and take things past friendship if they're into you, but you've gotta make it clear that you want things to go in that direction.

[ScottyTheBody]

Exactly, and Scotty, this may be where you're having trouble.

Girls do want all the "nice guy" stuff, but at the same time, if you wanna get past being "just friends" you have to let us know that. This does not mean that you have to make all the moves on us though. For example, I dated a guy who was really shy, but because he hinted at sexual things, and made it clear to me that he was interested in going in that direction, I had no problem taking the lead and getting the ball rolling. The problem comes in when a guy doesn't make that clear. Most girls are willing to make the first move, and take things past friendship if they're into you, but you've gotta make it clear that you want things to go in that direction.

I do get the ball rolling. Just not initially. I can't tell whether I want to date or get in a relationship with someone I meet initially, I see eye candy for what it is, just candy. I try to find out more about the person first before I find any real attraction. Once I do find it though, I make it clear (though this used to be problem), I make it clear, sometimes go out a few times (with interest on their side) and then always the same result with the same responses.

"Most girls are willing to make the first move"...sorry I don't believe that.

[CTGirl]

I do get the ball rolling. Just not initially. I can't tell whether I want to date or get in a relationship with someone I meet initially, I see eye candy for what it is, just candy. I try to find out more about the person first before I find any real attraction. Once I do find it though, I make it clear (though this used to be problem), I make it clear, sometimes go out a few times (with interest on their side) and then always the same result with the same responses.

"Most girls are willing to make the first move"...sorry I don't believe that.

Are you sure that your signals are getting across? That may be the problem. I am in a situation right now with a guy who sounds an awful lot like you, and he's told me about very similar past frustrations to yours. From my perspective, it seems like he's not all that into me, but at the same time, from his perspective, I think that he thinks something different. You may be giving off "lets just be friends" vibes like he is without realizing it.

[ScottyTheBody]

Are you sure that your signals are getting across? That may be the problem. I am in a situation right now with a guy who sounds an awful lot like you, and he's told me about very similar past frustrations to yours. From my perspective, it seems like he's not all that into me, but at the same time, from his perspective, I think that he thinks something different. You may be giving off "lets just be friends" vibes like he is without realizing it.

In the way past, this was a major problem for me. You are right about that.

However, I think its pretty clear when I tell them my feelings clearly (though often not the first time I meet them but after we are actually friends for a while), they accept "dates" with me, sometimes kiss afterwards, hold hands, etc.

Then again, I am pretty slow about asking out and making a move.

[CTGirl]

In the way past, this was a major problem for me. You are right about that.

However, I think its pretty clear when I tell them my feelings clearly (though often not the first time I meet them but after we are actually friends for a while), they accept "dates" with me, sometimes kiss afterwards, hold hands, etc.

Well, keep in mind that what's "clear" to you, may not be so clear for the other person. The guy I mentioned invites me out on "dates" and gives me a kiss at the end of the night, etc., but for me, there's still a lot of uncertainty as to where this is headed, cuz that's as far as it's gotten. So, while he, because he is admitedly "slow," may be thinking that he's showing his interest, to me, he's showing just as much disinterest as interest (because I'm basing it off of my past experiences with other guys)

[and1grad]

Scotty,
I'm sure this doesnt help you at all right now but I've actually found women to be MUCH easier to understand AFTER the college years.

[dddork]

Scotty, I've got a book for you to read.. and go visit askmen.com..

[WorkInProgress]

Scotty,
I'm sure this doesnt help you at all right now but I've actually found women to be MUCH easier to understand AFTER the college years.

Yay! I think pretty much everyone is hard to read while they're still growing up. Maybe because they're still trying to figure out who the are and what they want.

[CTGirl]

Scotty,
I'm sure this doesnt help you at all right now but I've actually found women to be MUCH easier to understand AFTER the college years.

lol, this is DEFINITELY true!

[ScottyTheBody]

Well, keep in mind that what's "clear" to you, may not be so clear for the other person. The guy I mentioned invites me out on "dates" and gives me a kiss at the end of the night, etc., but for me, there's still a lot of uncertainty as to where this is headed, cuz that's as far as it's gotten. So, while he, because he is admitedly "slow," may be thinking that he's showing his interest, to me, he's showing just as much disinterest as interest (because I'm basing it off of my past experiences with other guys)

Okay, well then what is showing interest? What should I do?

Like I don't go to second or third base until much MUCH later...is that a big problem? Is the "third date" rule applied much more than I thought? Is this the problem?

[ScottyTheBody]

Scotty, I've got a book for you to read.. and go visit askmen.com..

I've seen that and I know lots about another interesting theory, ladder theory. That David DeAngelo may be right about some stuff but I just can't stand how he always says, as my buddy Sal the Fish says...

HE QUOTES PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN EXIST.

[wordsmith]

I'm sure this doesnt help you at all right now but I've actually found women to be MUCH easier to understand AFTER the college years.

Yup.

Grown ups as a rule are easier to communicate with and understand than adolescents or people just out of their teenage years.

Ideally, the older you get, and the more you see, the more you realize what you want and are looking for, and the better you get at communicating it clearly. That's one reason it's easier. Most of us aren't totally new at it anymore.

[CTGirl]

Okay, well then what is showing interest? What should I do?

Like I don't go to second or third base until much MUCH later...is that a big problem? Is the "third date" rule applied much more than I thought? Is this the problem?

I would never think about this as a "problem" but I'm certainly glad that my guy gave me a heads up on his pace, so you may want to do the same. If he hadn't gotten tipsy enough to tell me that he "tends to be really slow with women" and ask me if taht was okay, I probably would have given up on him by now.

You should never feel rushed, and you should take things at the pace that you want to, but just be aware that your pace may not be the right one for the other person, so you may want to mention it so she's not getting the wrong impression.

[CTGirl]

I've seen that and I know lots about another interesting theory, ladder theory. That David DeAngelo may be right about some stuff but I just can't stand how he always says, as my buddy Sal the Fish says...

HE QUOTES PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN EXIST.

Stuff like this that's meant to apply to everyone is usually useless. You're much better off talking to real people who've been in the situations you're in and know the kinds of people you're dealing with so they can give you better advice.

[wordsmith]

Like I don't go to second or third base until much MUCH later...is that a big problem? Is the "third date" rule applied much more than I thought? Is this the problem?

Scotty...the thing is, nobody can go down a checklist and tell you quantitatively what the problem is...because, if these boards show nothing else, they show quite vividly that different people prefer different things. Different people will react differently to different things about you. You can't tailor your behavior to "please all women," it's not even possible. And moreover, you shouldn't WANT to.

[dddork]

I've seen that and I know lots about another interesting theory, ladder theory. That David DeAngelo may be right about some stuff but I just can't stand how he always says, as my buddy Sal the Fish says...

HE QUOTES PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN EXIST.

quiet man.. this might get me in big trouble.. Screw David D.. he's got nothin on N S.. and J S

[Still Looking]

Sorry, you MEN on this board are abslutely WRONG. Period. Women don't go for nice guys IN A BAR! That may be the only place the nice guy is at a disadvantage. Good thing life isn't lived in a bar. And yeah, sure some women fall for it, but are those women truly the ones you are interested in anyways?


Join a sports league or volunteer somewhere and see how far hair touching and boiling hormones will get you.


Yeah, I hate trying to find a decent woman in a bar / club.....its terrible.

[wordsmith]

I'm nice. I'm decent. I'm in bars. Odds are against me being the only nice, decent woman who goes to bars. Are you a dirtbag because you go to bars? Not necessarily.

Broken record alert #2, my parents met in a bar more than 35 years ago.

[Still Looking]

I'm nice. I'm decent. I'm in bars. Odds are against me being the only nice, decent woman who goes to bars. Are you a dirtbad because you go to bars? Not necessarily.

Broken record alert #2, my parents met in a bar more than 35 years ago.

No you are not a dirtbag just because you go to bars. It has just been my experience that I seem to only meet sleazy women there. It is just my problem that I cannot find the decent ones in the bar at the same time! Any advice? Sorry I must have come off the wrong way.

[asm198]

So, you guys who are constantly being turned down or being treated the exact opposite of what us girls are telling you that we act, exactly what type of girls are you hitting on? I'd like a general description of the girls. And don't give me that line of, 'I am attracted to all types'.

[Still Looking]

So, you guys who are constantly being turned down or being treated the exact opposite of what us girls are telling you that we act, exactly what type of girls are you hitting on? I'd like a general description of the girls. And don't give me that line of, 'I am attracted to all types'.

Well, I am not being turned down. Problem is, the women that I meet turn out to be totally different after a few weeks of seeing them. My original question was, where to find decent women that you can have an intelligent conversation with, have fun with, etc. After a few weeks or months, I am usually bored to death with the woman I have been seeing for the past weeks simply because she isn't who I thought she was. I don't know, maybe I just met too many "fake" chicks!

[KCboy]

After a few weeks or months, I am usually bored to death with the woman I have been seeing for the past weeks simply because she isn't who I thought she was. I don't know, maybe I just met too many "fake" chicks!

are you meeting these women in the course of normal life, or going out of your way to meet different people?

it seems that when you meet someone doing something you normally do (examples: working out, church, at a bookstore, etc) you would have more in common than just picking up some bar-fly on Friday night.


or maybe you are also being somewhat fake (in an attempt to be likable) when you first meet them too.

[PenforPrez]

So, you guys who are constantly being turned down or being treated the exact opposite of what us girls are telling you that we act, exactly what type of girls are you hitting on? I'd like a general description of the girls. And don't give me that line of, 'I am attracted to all types'.

I don't get turned down as much as I get ignored. It would be easier to be turned down if I could actually meet somebody SINGLE. I don't hit on girls either; I'm not smooth with lines or things like that. I'm just an honest guy who can get freaky when the situation calls for it.

I've always been drawn to the strong, independent woman. The kind who knows what she wants and will tell you so. With that kind of woman, I find it easier to be myself and be generous and giving and caring. But each one I've met has some odd quirk, too. :frustrate

I have a lot of the same problems Scotty mentioned, and still do at 26. Always being the platonic friend, waiting too long to ask somebody out, never able to get past that certain spot. I was hoping I'd be past that at my age. Sadly, I'm not. :sad:

Paul

[ScottyTheBody]

So, you guys who are constantly being turned down or being treated the exact opposite of what us girls are telling you that we act, exactly what type of girls are you hitting on? I'd like a general description of the girls. And don't give me that line of, 'I am attracted to all types'.

The women that I'm attracted to are firstly extremely intelligent. If they're smarter than me, especially in mathematics, that's just HOT. I know its odd and you may not actually believe it but its true.

I am also attracted to the really talkative kind, like the kind that has a hard time slowing down in front of me. I like this because I'm quiet sometimes and this sort of balances things out I guess.

I also think I might have a bit of a hero complex. I usually fall hard for the women that I can help out of a problem. I don't know how to explain it but I just feel useful, and well, more purpose driven, which is a great feeling (the same kind I get when volunteering or tutoring).

Of course I'm attracted to the extremely nice ones, like the girls that are always smiling, the ones that talk to you as if no one else is in the room. The ones that never put anyone else down or judge anyone else, completely open-minded, far from superficial, loyal, honest to me even if its going to cause pain and someone with strong morals.

These types of women are very hard to find. When I do find these types of women though, I usually fall hard for them. And rightfully so though, they are quite often in high demand from guys for girlfriends (also unfortunately, they run into a few jackass guys before realizing what a real boyfriend should be like).

She doesn't have to be a beauty queen or a size 2. In fact I kind of like them on the bigger side (though not heavier than me which I don't think should be a problem), so long as there's a beautiful smile. I do like shorter women, though dating a taller woman would not be a problem. One thing I do like though, like a whole lot, to the point which I just can't ignore, is thick long black curly hair (I have no idea why) and glasses.

Oh yeah, she can't drink excessively, smoke or do drugs. The other things were kind of optional or pluses if they have them but this one is a must.

I also don't chase after a girl once they have a boyfriend, to me its like off-limits and often times I become aquaintances with her but nothing more (or in exceptionally rare cases, friends).

By the way, I didn't say I get turned down (used to) as much as my problem is the "spark" disappears.

[WorkInProgress]

Well, I am not being turned down. Problem is, the women that I meet turn out to be totally different after a few weeks of seeing them. My original question was, where to find decent women that you can have an intelligent conversation with, have fun with, etc. After a few weeks or months, I am usually bored to death with the woman I have been seeing for the past weeks simply because she isn't who I thought she was. I don't know, maybe I just met too many "fake" chicks!

Quality is hard to find. Compatible and quality is even harder.

[The X]

Girls a question: is it wrong for me to have a rule not to date girls that weigh more than me. Does that make me an ass. I weigh 180.

[PenforPrez]

Quality is hard to find. Compatible and quality is even harder.

My therapist was telling me I have a problem with similar. Said I'm just such a different and intelligent person that it would be hard for me to find a match. Great. Four years after my only actual relationship ended, I find this out. :frustrate

Paul

[WorkInProgress]

My therapist was telling me I have a problem with similar. Said I'm just such a different and intelligent person that it would be hard for me to find a match. Great. Four years after my only actual relationship ended, I find this out. :frustrate

Paul

I have pretty much always known this, which is probably a big reason why I don't have oodles of dating experience. Don't mean I don't look. It means I'm picky. (And a little scared, but we don't need to get into that.)

[WorkInProgress]

Girls a question: is it wrong for me to have a rule not to date girls that weigh more than me. Does that make me an ass. I weigh 180.

Wrong, no. You can have any rules you want. Are you ruling out some quality women, yep. But you do that with any rule.

[The X]

Wrong, no. You can have any rules you want. Are you ruling out some quality women, yep. But you do that with any rule.
I mean my favorite girl I've ever gone out with, and we're still friends, she was what might be called "chubby" but man she was a great person, probably one of the best all around people in the world, not exaggerating. She would say sometimes "why do you like me I have a belly" and I would go on how she was great and etc. to make her feel assuaged.

[PenforPrez]

I have pretty much always known this, which is probably a big reason why I don't have oodles of dating experience. Don't mean I don't look. It means I'm picky. (And a little scared, but we don't need to get into that.)

My problem simply is that meeting singles for me is about as easy as reinventing the wheel. I have to be selective, but I seem to get burned anyway. I just really would like to get another date before I lose more hair. :neutral:

I was watching this OLD episode of Milton Berle one time; think it was from around 1950. The guest on the show was Vic Damone, a very handsome, very popular pop singer of the period. There was this young actress playing the stereotypical ditzy blonde assistant.

She walks up to Vic Damone with this big grin and says: "Are you single?"

Milton Berle says: "Will you stop it with the single business?"

"I'm trying to, Milton."

I feel like that so many times.

Paul

[KCboy]

****Edited****

[dddork]

there is nothing wrong in being shallow

[wordsmith]

It's your choice to be shallow. I might think there IS something wrong with it, and think less of you for it. But, yeah, it's totally your choice.

[dddork]

common everyone is a bit shallow in dating world.. I go to gym 5 days a week and have great body.. I would not go out with someone who is fat/chubby.. If I am not physically attracted to the person.. what's the point??

[wordsmith]

There is no point in dating somebody you're not attracted to. Your preferences and criteria for what attracts you can still land you in the shallow camp, though.

[The X]

It's just if the girl weighs more than the guy, a lot of things are off you know? Same as if the girl is taller than the guy. A lot of girls say they wouldn't date a shorter guy.

[wordsmith]

Eh, I've both outweighed and been taller than guys. It's not the end of the world.

[dddork]

edit.. I dont wanna insult no one.. my bad

[wordsmith]

I don't care what you do or who you wanna date, but if you insult anybody on these boards (which you're perilously close to doing, guess what, I bet fat chicks post here), you're not gonna be welcome to post here anymore.

[dddork]

Sorry.. shouldn't have said that..

[The X]

Yeah I'm not trying to insult anyone, I know I for one have a far from perfect body.

[dddork]

Yeah I'm not trying to insult anyone, I know I for one have a far from perfect body.

me too.. cosign that.. I dont mean to insult anyone EVER!.. may be tease and make fun in a polite way..

[wordsmith]

Then let's keep it in perspective. Say you're a guy and weight 120 lbs. soaking wet. Date who you want, who you're attracted to, most comfortable with, whatever, who cares. But don't say that anybody who weighs more than you is fat, just because they weigh more than you. If you don't want to date somebody who outweighs you, that's your business. But when you start throwing around numbers and saying "This is fat," you're going to hurt feelings on these boards and you're not going to last as a poster. I hope this is clear.

[wordsmith]

me too.. cosign that.. I dont mean to insult anyone EVER!.. may be tease and make fun in a polite way..

"Teasing" about weight is NEVER polite. Ever. Don't do it.

[The X]

Sometimes though I think teasing helps motivate people to work to lose the weight. For a while last year I was developing a beer belly, it kind of looked like I was pregnant. I got a lot of teasing for a while so I decided I'd show them and I went jogging and started eating less and now my stomach looks decent, still trying for the irksome six pack but at least I got off my ass.

[wordsmith]

That's fine for people you know in life if you have that kind of relationship with them. You don't have that relationship with everyone who posts here, though, so do not post in that manner.

What I'm talking about is messageboard culture, everything I just posted is in relationship to these boards and conduct of posters.

[WorkInProgress]

Sometimes though I think teasing helps motivate people to work to lose the weight. For a while last year I was developing a beer belly, it kind of looked like I was pregnant. I got a lot of teasing for a while so I decided I'd show them and I went jogging and started eating less and now my stomach looks decent, still trying for the irksome six pack but at least I got off my ass.

Teasing from random people you didn't know, or teasing from friends/family? Neither is polite, but the former, IMO is incredibly rude and uncalled-for.

EDIT: Words, jinx.

[The X]

Teasing from random people you didn't know, or teasing from friends/family? Neither is polite, but the former, IMO is incredibly rude and uncalled-for.

EDIT: Words, jinx.
It was friends/family. Ok noted. But anyway I wasn't trying to tease, sometimes I just lack common sense, sorry.

[dddork]

I am just SORRY!.. i am not doing it again

[wordsmith]

Relative newbies and those who may not have seen the following pinned thread are encouraged to check it out, in terms of what types of posts are and aren't problematic.

http://www.quarterlifecrisis.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12402

[and1grad]

kcboy/dddork,
Hopefully wordsmith has cleared up these conduct issues for you but if not, I'm sure there are other boards that have what you're looking for.

[KCboy]

Relative newbies and those who may not have seen the following pinned thread are encouraged to check it out, in terms of what types of posts are and aren't problematic.

http://www.quarterlifecrisis.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12402

Those are all extremely vague

[and1grad]

No one else has had a problem with em.

[LaFille]

It's just if the girl weighs more than the guy, a lot of things are off you know? Same as if the girl is taller than the guy. A lot of girls say they wouldn't date a shorter guy.

i always said i would never date a short guy, until i met a really great one and dated him! you never know!

also, just because you work out a lot and have a 'great body,' this doesn't mean as much to women as you might think. it doesn't mean you 'deserve' a hot chick with a great body, because a lot of girls don't really like dating guys who spend half their free time at the gym and the other half staring in the mirror. not to mention, just because someone is overweight, DOESN'T MEAN they don't spend a lot of time at the gym as well! there are more factors than exercise and diet that affect a person's size and shape, some of which are totally beyond anyone's control!

[wordsmith]

I'm also wondering what things are off if a woman weighs more than a guy. I've never noticed any problems.

[The X]

I'm also wondering what things are off if a woman weighs more than a guy. I've never noticed any problems.
For one thing you can't pick her up ever. Also it sucks if you can't reach around her to hug her, then you can't slow dance good either, it just causes a lot of problems.

[wordsmith]

Sorry..I'd really like to let this die...but I just can't.

So, to you, "weighing more than the guy" means you're automatically Jabba the Hut and mere mortal men's arms will not reach around your mountainous girth?

That's kinda funny. It seems like you think any woman who weighs more than a guy is hugely obese.

It makes me wonder how it is that I've been easily picked up, slow danced with, and hugged all these years when I've dated guys shorter than me and, having smaller frames, typically weighing less.

[The X]

Sorry..I'd really like to let this die...but I just can't.

So, to you, "weighing more than the guy" means you're automatically Jabba the Hut and mere mortal men's arms will not reach around your mountainous girth?

That's kinda funny. It seems like you think any woman who weighs more than a guy is hugely obese.

It makes me wonder how it is that I've been easily picked up, slow danced with, and hugged all these years when I've dated guys shorter than me and, having smaller frames, typically weighing less.
You're right I shouldn't say weighs more than me, I guess some number doesn't mean anything, I guess my only complaint is a certain body type, oftend times that body type weighs more than mine, but then again it just might mean the girl is taller than average and has a lot of muscle, then she could weigh more than me. But also I would like to be able to lift the girl, there's the whole carrying her over the threshold cliche.

[LaFille]

For one thing you can't pick her up ever. Also it sucks if you can't reach around her to hug her, then you can't slow dance good either, it just causes a lot of problems.

yes, yes, i can see how that would cause a problem if you ever had to pick your girlfriend up and carry her somewhere. major transportation problems there. :neutral:

i can understand not wanting to date someone who takes no care for their personal appearance and health, because that is more of a personality thing, but you seem to be ruling out all women who have a couple of extra pounds, most of whom do not fit into that category at all.

[wordsmith]

You're right I shouldn't say weighs more than me, I guess some number doesn't mean anything, I guess my only complaint is a certain body type, oftend times that body type weighs more than mine, but then again it just might mean the girl is taller than average and has a lot of muscle, then she could weigh more than me. But also I would like to be able to lift the girl, there's the whole carrying her over the threshold cliche.

Oh, well, hell, at 5'10" tall and 160-165 being my fighting weight, I'm doubting I'm going to spend a lot of time being carried over thresholds or sitting on a guy's shoulders. C'est la vie. Probably wouldn't pre-empt a potential relationship over it. :rolleyes:

[WorkInProgress]

there's the whole carrying her over the threshold cliche.

Do people still do that? I mean, outside of the movies.

[Chameleon]

Oh, well, hell, at 5'10" tall and 160-165 being my fighting weight, I'm doubting I'm going to spend a lot of time being carried over thresholds or sitting on a guy's shoulders. C'est la vie. Probably wouldn't pre-empt a potential relationship over it. :rolleyes:
Come on, wordsmith! It's primal, you know, like hitting the woman over the head with a club and being able to throw her over your shoulder or drag her to your cave.

There's also the social aspect of it; it's at least 50% of the times that you are out that you HAVE to sit on your guy's shoulders or ride piggy back or get carried around... It's always great to relive modes of transportation I shared with my dad when I was 5 with my boyfriend! :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[The X]

Oh, well, hell, at 5'10" tall and 160-165 being my fighting weight, I'm doubting I'm going to spend a lot of time being carried over thresholds or sitting on a guy's shoulders. C'est la vie. Probably wouldn't pre-empt a potential relationship over it. :rolleyes:
Well you weigh less then me, I'm 6'4 and 180, actually height has a lot to do with it. You're just right. If you were like 200 I'd be wary. Like I said earlier in this thread I went out with a girl, she was chubby. She was like 5'2 though, short, not sure how much she weighed but less than me.

[dddork]

carrying the girl: not as a mode of transportation.. but i'd say let your imagination run WILD. !

[wordsmith]

AGAIN. Can we PLEASE not throw up numbers and say "WHOAH, now THAT'S big?" There's no need to hurt people's feelings. Thanks.

[The X]

carrying the girl: not as a mode of transportation.. but i'd say let your imagination run WILD. !
Exactly this man understands me.

[CTGirl]

In defense of The X, I do see what you're saying about dating a woman smaller than you, and from what I've read, it doesnt sound like you're in any way trying to be offensive to overweight people.

I have dated guys who are smaller than me (vertically or horizontally) and I don't like it, as 1950 as it may be, I like my man to be the big strong one, not me. Also, you are certainly not the only guy I've heard talk about wanting to be able to lift his gf.

Oh, and six-packs are over-rated - they make you much less comfy to lay on :razz:

[WorkInProgress]

And besides, people can wear the same amount of weight (numbers-wise) differently, so even if there were a magic set of numbers, they wouldn't always be the case.

[wordsmith]

Sorry, CTGirl, writing "If you were like 200 I'd be wary," is not cool. Intended as offensive or no.

[CTGirl]

Sorry, CTGirl, writing "If you were like 200 I'd be wary," is not cool. Intended as offensive or no.

No, I agree that statements like that should be left out of the board.

[SmilesSoSweet]

Sorry, CTGirl, writing "If you were like 200 I'd be wary," is not cool. Intended as offensive or no.

That's offensive. I won't even bother to go into anymore details.

The best ones are the ads on craigslist where guys would actually write "I'm looking for a girl that is X high and weighs between 100-125 lbs. Um because 130 is too much? Does the girl have to step on a scale before going out on a date with him? Seriously people carry their weight differently.

[The X]

Well my point wasn't that 200 means someone looks bad, just that it means the person weighs more than me, 180, and I admit I'm not that strong I can lift my weight if I'm lucky, really it's an insult to me if anything that I'm admitting to.

[wordsmith]

Check your PMs, X.

[and1grad]

Oh, and six-packs are over-rated - they make you much less comfy to lay on :razz:
I'm gonna be stealing this. Just thought you should know.

[CTGirl]

I'm gonna be stealing this. Just thought you should know.

Go right ahead, spread the word, cuz it's true, and you could be saving many men from pursuing six-packs in vain :)

[dddork]

its all about 8 pack.. 6 pack's are for wannabe's

[CTGirl]

its all about 8 pack.. 6 pack's are for wannabe's

eww

I would take a bit of a beer gut over that crap any day :razz:

[Still Looking]

Quality is hard to find. Compatible and quality is even harder.

Agreed. Maybe I am too picky.

[old_school_soul]

no don't take me wrong.. Its absolutely okay to be friends with opposite gender.. just not the ones you are attracted to!.. once you are in friends zone, you are in friends zone..

Yeah except for the hot belly dancer that said she wanted to be my friend--until I gave her a shoulder rub and she went nympho.

[old_school_soul]

I like when 23 year old boys try to give 30 year men advice on how to pick up women. lol.

[PenforPrez]

I like when 23 year old boys try to give 30 year men advice on how to pick up women. lol.

Sadly, some of us "older" men need it. :rolleyes:

[Winter Storm]

Sadly, some of us "older" men need it. :rolleyes:

No....you don't.

[The X]

gonna have to call bs on the whole girls saying they don't like 6 packs thing, and that they prefer a beer belly. Just doesn't make sense.

[ScottyTheBody]

I'm also wondering what things are off if a woman weighs more than a guy. I've never noticed any problems.

I'm also wondering what things are off on a guy that's shorter than a woman?

It could just be me, and I apologize if I'm off-base here, but to me, a guy saying that he wouldn't date someone who was heavier than him and then posting his weight is no different than a woman saying she wouldn't date someone who was shorter than her and then she posting her height.

http://www.quarterlifecrisis.com/forums/showthread.php?t=21548

I know that you in particular haven't said anything about not dating shorter men, however many women on this board have, and though I'm not particularly short, and don't find it offensive, I could understand a guy who is on the shorter side taking offense to it.

However, I could be way off here and if I am please tell me.

[WorkInProgress]

gonna have to call bs on the whole girls saying they don't like 6 packs thing, and that they prefer a beer belly. Just doesn't make sense.

6 pack=nice to look at

non-washboard abs=comfortable to cuddle

Call whatever you want. Believe whatever you want. Women, like all people, have different priorities. However, I don't think I know any, personally, who are looking for a 6 pack (and I know no one who's mentioned that to me), and I know several who've mentioned how nice it is to cuddle with someone who's not ripped.

[The X]

Well cuddling sucks anyway.

[CTGirl]

gonna have to call bs on the whole girls saying they don't like 6 packs thing, and that they prefer a beer belly. Just doesn't make sense.

You callin me a liar? :razz:

I know I may not represent the views of all women, and there are certainly shallow-er women out there, or women with different preferences than mine, but I think it's safe to say that the majority of women in this country couldn't really care less if the man they date has a 6-pack or not.

Also, as a fan of the show Girls Next Door (about Hugh Hefner's gfs) I can tell you that when asked, they agreed that they would rather have a beer belly than a 6-pack on their man.

[CTGirl]

Well cuddling sucks anyway.

Ah, well there's your whole problem right there!