Out of work for 6 months and losing my mind--RANT

[jrwilheim]

Okay...my last day at my last full-time, permanent job was April 21st, about five and a half months ago. I am six weeks away from exhausting my unemployment. Here's what I've had since:

1) 2 1/2 weeks at a temp job where I was hired to replace someone was too slow doing data entry, but it turned out I was no faster, so they got rid of me instead

2) A few freelance interviews for a blogger introduced to me by my ex-boss, at $300 apiece, and another $1000 project that I'm in the midst of right now. This guy had promised to take me on for the summer, which made me feel better about leaving the crappy temp job, but it turned out he couldn't.

3) About three days' worth of temping, at $10 an hour, for a nonprofit; I'll have another day at a different nonprofit, also at $10 an hour, on Wednesday

4) Three in person interviews and one phone interview, one of which involved being dragged to New Jersey only to have three interviewers debate, in front of me, whether I was completely unqualified or overqualified for the position. Another is still getting back to me with a personality profile I need to complete (silly me, I thought interviews were for assessing the candidate's personality). An interview for a position at a financial representative position, which I didn't get because I scored a 2 out of 19 on some freaking online test of fitness for the position.

5) An interview tomorrow for a job as a diamond sorter, paying $8 for the first three months but going up to $25K a year after that. Somehow I have a feeling I'll be told I'm overqualified and sent back to the agency because God forbid a Columbia graduate sort diamonds for a living.

6) A bunch of temp agencies talk to me as if I were the best thing since sliced bread and then do everything BUT find me work, the exception being the $10 an hour temp jobs described above.

7) A lot of shitty people (and some non-shitty but nevertheless irritating people) saying things to me like, "Have you considered temping?" "You're a Columbia grad--you should never be without a white collar job." "Just send out a million letters." "Why do you want to do X [some job the person saying this seems to think is beneath me as a Columbia grad, it never occuring to said person that the answer is, "because I want to work."]

Thank God I go back into therapy on Thursday.

[yankeeyosh]

I hear ya...I'm not out of work, but I have been in the past...twice, and all wind up getting are jobs that are NOWHERE in the same galaxy compared to my potential (and I'm an Ivy League grad, too).

And I'm starting to wonder if they're going to fire me eventually at this job. The work is so easy that I keep making stupid mistakes since I'm so bored. If they fire me after December, it wouldn't be as devastating as if they fire me now.

[PenforPrez]

Jrwilhelm, you'll be fine. Therapy is a great way to deal with unemployment issues. If you can afford it, that is. I had to do without therapy the last couple of months of my lengthy unemployment, and how I did it, I have no idea.

I recommend what worked for me. The little things. Think about the little things you want to do when you go back to full-time work. Eating out, doing something socially, taking a day trip somewhere. Those were it for me. The beef industry is glad to see me working again, let me tell you. ;)

Little things add up to big things in life. Hope this helps. :)

Paul

[jrwilheim]

Jrwilhelm, you'll be fine. Therapy is a great way to deal with unemployment issues. If you can afford it, that is. I had to do without therapy the last couple of months of my lengthy unemployment, and how I did it, I have no idea.

I recommend what worked for me. The little things. Think about the little things you want to do when you go back to full-time work. Eating out, doing something socially, taking a day trip somewhere. Those were it for me. The beef industry is glad to see me working again, let me tell you. ;)

Little things add up to big things in life. Hope this helps. :)

Paul

My grandmother has agreed to pay for me to have some therapy until I find work again, thank God. I can't deal with all of this alone any more. I left therapy in May because of economic issues, but have realized I can't face all of this alone.

[pisces2473]

What about moving to a place where there are more jobs, ones better suited for your background and skills?

[jrwilheim]

What about moving to a place where there are more jobs, ones better suited for your background and skills?

I don't know where that would be...everyone seems to be coming to NYC because there are no jobs elsewhere. What would my chances be anywhere else? And how would I get an apartment with no job?

[pisces2473]

There are places that will rent w/o you having a job, esp. in smaller communities. As long as you have a co-signer or savings...

I think a lot of people are going to NYC b/c of the myth that they can make it in the big city. I know I could never do it. Just not my nature to be so competitive. Maybe it's not the place for you, either.

[jrwilheim]

There are places that will rent w/o you having a job, esp. in smaller communities. As long as you have a co-signer or savings...

I think a lot of people are going to NYC b/c of the myth that they can make it in the big city. I know I could never do it. Just not my nature to be so competitive. Maybe it's not the place for you, either.

I feel like it isn't a lot of the time but I feel trapped and don't see any way of getting out. All of my connections and contacts, such as they are, are here. I have a lot of fantasies of moving to Philadelphia, but I don't see them coming true anytime soon.

[wordsmith]

I can also attest to the reality that there is less competition for professional-level jobs in smaller cities and towns because so many educated/trained people fly the coop for larger cities where they're one of millions.

[pisces2473]

I feel like it isn't a lot of the time but I feel trapped and don't see any way of getting out. All of my connections and contacts, such as they are, are here. I have a lot of fantasies of moving to Philadelphia, but I don't see them coming true anytime soon.
What types of jobs do you want to do? What types of jobs do you need contacts for anyway?

Why not start looking for jobs in Philly--at least online?

[thedave]

There are places that will rent w/o you having a job, esp. in smaller communities. As long as you have a co-signer or savings...

I think a lot of people are going to NYC b/c of the myth that they can make it in the big city. I know I could never do it. Just not my nature to be so competitive. Maybe it's not the place for you, either.

If NYC is not your place, try the radiuses away from NYC. Metro Connecticut/NJ/PA still have a good array of job opportunities, but not as fast-paced as NYC.

There are pockets of job areas too. For example, near DC in, I think,
?Virginia? it is known as the "Eastern Silicon Valley" (if computers is your thing). (My example is merely to illustrate that there are areas all around suited to whatever your major/industry is).

[Musicvixen24]

Yeah i am in that same boat. I left my job at the end of August and am looking for a new one..I don't understand the purpose of temp agencys they seem to always be busy but they aren't placing anybody, then they randomly call you out of the blue, expecting you to be free...whew. sorry.a nyways good luck, that bit of money you are getting is more than me lol, so keep your head up.

[LaFille]

7) A lot of shitty people (and some non-shitty but nevertheless irritating people) saying things to me like, "Have you considered temping?" "You're a Columbia grad--you should never be without a white collar job." "Just send out a million letters." "Why do you want to do X [some job the person saying this seems to think is beneath me as a Columbia grad, it never occuring to said person that the answer is, "because I want to work."]


oh my gosh. job search advice and questions. kill me.

'are you following up on your resumes?' 'have you tried a temp agency?' 'have you tried XXXXX company? they're always hiring.'

or my favorite: 'do you have a resume?' :eek:

[shimma]

7) A lot of shitty people (and some non-shitty but nevertheless irritating people) saying things to me like, "Have you considered temping?" "You're a Columbia grad--you should never be without a white collar job."

Not their business. Have you ever considered that maybe you'd be better suited to a different industry than law?

[jrwilheim]

Not their business. Have you ever considered that maybe you'd be better suited to a different industry than law?

Yes, which is why I have not looked for another paralegal job. But nonetheless, I deal with questions like these.

[shimma]

Yes, which is why I have not looked for another paralegal job. But nonetheless, I deal with questions like these.

Hey, I wasn't trying to be an ass, I was trying to be constructive. The way you seem to think, I'd guess maybe a more tecnical (finance/computers/etc) job might be a better route for you. I didn't know where you stood with your jobsearch or what you were looking for.

But yes, when you graduate from an "elite" school there is definitely more pressure and seemingly more stigma surrounding unemployment. My advice? Avoid bringing it up with any fellow Columbians who've graduated in the last 5 yrs or so; people from my alma mater (similar tier to yours) are just starting not to be all competitive and weird about employment.

ETA: And I've been out for 5 yrs and change.

[jrwilheim]

Hey, I wasn't trying to be an ass, I was trying to be constructive. The way you seem to think, I'd guess maybe a more tecnical (finance/computers/etc) job might be a better route for you. I didn't know where you stood with your jobsearch or what you were looking for.

But yes, when you graduate from an "elite" school there is definitely more pressure and seemingly more stigma surrounding unemployment. My advice? Avoid bringing it up with any fellow Columbians who've graduated in the last 5 yrs or so; people from my alma mater (similar tier to yours) are just starting not to be all competitive and weird about employment.

ETA: And I've been out for 5 yrs and change.

Shimma,

I'm sorry I came across as a little too defensive. I didn't think you were trying to be an ass; I was just trying to explain my situation.

[yankeeyosh]

But yes, when you graduate from an "elite" school there is definitely more pressure and seemingly more stigma surrounding unemployment. My advice? Avoid bringing it up with any fellow Columbians who've graduated in the last 5 yrs or so; people from my alma mater (similar tier to yours) are just starting not to be all competitive and weird about employment.

Agreed. If I didn't graduate from an Ivy League school and didn't get a master's degree from a leading school in my field, I wouldn't be so angsty about jobs and such. Yet I consistently question what went wrong.

[shimma]

JR - it's cool, I just wanted to make sure my post didn't come across wrong.

Agreed. If I didn't graduate from an Ivy League school and didn't get a master's degree from a leading school in my field, I wouldn't be so angsty about jobs and such.

Oh, yes you would. You're an insanely smart (too smart for your own damn good sometimes) overacheiver, that is what we DO! You expect it of yourself, and have been hearing your whole freaking life how others expect it of you. I have my college classmates who try to get all competitive. You, Mark and probably JR, also have your snobby HS classmates being that way, and Mark, you have your grad school classmates being that way, on top of "competition" from your college buds.

IQ and academic success often assist in professional success, but contrary to popular misconception, they're not all that you need.

You personally Mark, I seriously think you need to pursue that thing that we talked about on the side.