Being friends with employees

[Fevered]

I've been fortunate enough to find a job that I really enjoy with a great company. The people who work there are predominantly under the age of 25 and it's a failry relaxed and loose work environment. We all put in long hours and over the course of working there I have made some strong friendships with several of my coworkers. When you spend a lot of time at work the people there start to be a big part of your social life as well.

I have been with the company for less than a year and have recently been promoted to management. So now these people who have become good friends are my subordinates, putting me in a potentially difficult situation. I'm not sure whether or not I can remain close friends with these people. I would certainly like to, but at the same time I realize that it may be difficult to be an effective manager if my friendships will result in any kind of perceived favourtism or any potential conflicts of interest. I'm not really sure how to transition from co-worker to boss when there are good friends involved. Any advice? Anyone else have experience with this type of situation?

[mishl982]

I can see how it's awkward but if they are really good friends it shouldn't bother them too much. There are tons of people at my work who are buddy buddy but are bosses of the other or work under their friends. I don't sense any tension.

[Deavan]

I've been fortunate enough to find a job that I really enjoy with a great company. The people who work there are predominantly under the age of 25 and it's a failry relaxed and loose work environment. We all put in long hours and over the course of working there I have made some strong friendships with several of my coworkers. When you spend a lot of time at work the people there start to be a big part of your social life as well.

I have been with the company for less than a year and have recently been promoted to management. So now these people who have become good friends are my subordinates, putting me in a potentially difficult situation. I'm not sure whether or not I can remain close friends with these people. I would certainly like to, but at the same time I realize that it may be difficult to be an effective manager if my friendships will result in any kind of perceived favourtism or any potential conflicts of interest. I'm not really sure how to transition from co-worker to boss when there are good friends involved. Any advice? Anyone else have experience with this type of situation?


As long as your friends can seperate "managment you" from "social you" and your friend can take any criticism you may have to give down the road in a mature manner I would imagine you will be able to adjust...

[spokes]

obviously the tone of the shop talk will change when you are around.

[BlueEyedFunOne]

As long as your friends can seperate "managment you" from "social you" and your friend can take any criticism you may have to give down the road in a mature manner I would imagine you will be able to adjust...


I think this is easier said than done. I see people here at my company who are 'work friends' and also 'social friends'. It never seems to be easy to balance without damaging one type of relationship or the other.

[dostoy]

I think you maybe be overthinking. I go out to lunch with my bosses, I've had a beer with one, same as in college I'd hang out with my professors, if you overthink it you go crazy. Life is too short and don't take it too serious. You have a job, you just got promoted, be happy!

[LakeJay]

I think you maybe be overthinking. I go out to lunch with my bosses, I've had a beer with one, same as in college I'd hang out with my professors, if you overthink it you go crazy. Life is too short and don't take it too serious. You have a job, you just got promoted, be happy!

I think the situation is a little different than your professor analogy. Your professors weren't in classes with you just the other day and then all of a sudden became your professors. The professor-student relationship was established right from the beginning. Fevered is going from a co-worker-co-worker dynamic to supervisor-subordinate relationship.

Fevered - I think you just go about your new role as you are expected. It'll be a tough transition but I think this will be "learn as you go" experience. Just know that there is the possibility that some friendships may change.

[jls]

I would say first and foremost there is a very thin line between friendships and working relationships. It usually tends to get sticky. Make sure you set expectations accordingly. When at work you are required to make non-bias decisions. If there is a project that your friend is dying to be in charge of, but there is someone more qualified- you have to make the best decision for your company. Make sure that it is understood that work is not personal. If your coworker friends cannot understand that then you need to evaluate how the friendship will effect your position as a manager. Setting expectations is imperative.

[wordsmith]

It depends entirely upon the atmosphere and personalities involved. Some allow for a friendly dynamic, some don't.

[Kitty]

I do prefer a more structured relationship with my boss. I actually think my current relationship is ideal. I feel really comfortable around my boss, we talk a lot, occasionally have lunch, etc. There's a line of professionalism that we always maintain, though. I really need that line to be there for my own sanity and well being. It's kinda like the parent child relatonship. No matter how much you want to be best friends with your kids, you really have to draw a line. That's not to say you can't be friends, but the "boss" role has to trump the "friend" role.

[Jman06]

Ever hear the saying "Its lonely at the top"