santa and the entitlement complex

[kitalyn414]

i was listening to a talk radio station on which the dj was making a persuasive argument against continuing the santa myth. he was saying that teaching children that a fat man will magically deliver presents creates a generation of people who believe that they DESERVE something for doing nothing.

in addition, the whole pattern of lying to children about santa, the tooth fairy, the easter bunny, etc. is a little disturbing. i remember how upset i was when i found out that santa wasn't real. that sucked! then i wondered what else my parents were lying about.

anyway, all of this has me thinking that when i have kids, my family won't do the santa thing. christmas could still be really fun, and we would put out presents overnight and stuff, but maybe it would be better for the kids to know where they came from.

thoughts?

[Crossroads]

hmmm...as far as people who think they deserve something for doing nothing, let's look at the Rich Girls or Paris Hilton...

I wasn't crushed and never thought about my parents lying to me as far as finding out that Santa, Tooth Fairy, etc. weren't real. To me, that was kind of the magic of childhood. Being excited that Santa would come and wondering how he got the stockings filled without me knowing (of course, I'd try to stay awake but fall asleep...) I think I will continue the tradition with my kids. I'd be sad that they didn't get to experience that same childhood joy & mystery.

[coll214]

I'd have to agree with Crossroads; it just adds to the fun of Christmas. My parents for years would say oh yeah santa is real after i insisted he wasn't; it just became a running gag as i got older. It just seems cynical to me start kids out without the mystical dream of Santa bringing gifts to all the children; even if it was odd that one year he used the same wrapping paper as mom :p.

[Benwa]

Certain parts of the santa myth are creepy. He's constantly watching you and keeping lists. He can even see if you are sleeping. He lives in a secluded area, can get into your house with the greatest of ease and is leaves no evidence except for cookie crumbs (perhaps new dna technology could nab him). He wears outlandish clothes and likes it when children sit on his lap (sounds like micheal jackson). Kids cry when they see him at the mall which is a bad sign, they know something. Plus theres unknowns. Do the elves get paid a good wage? Has PETA approached him about his reindeer? Whats the environmental impact of his flying sleigh? Why's rudolphs nose red, is he a drunk, if so is he the best candidate to lead the sleigh? Does Mrs. claus exist or was she drummed up as a pr stunt. If she does exist why isn't she more in the picture, does santa keep her darning stockings? Do they have children? If Mrs. Claus is a drummed up pr stunt, why invent her. Is Santa potentially gay?

I guess I got into national enquirer mode near the end there. But about the only thing I find redeaming about santa is unconditional generosity. I don't know when it happened but christmas became so capitalistic and consumption driven. Giving gifts can be healthy but I think it should be spontaneous. How boring is it to make a list and act surprised when you get what you asked for.

[Starfish]

My parents never lied to me about Santa. My mom always told me that there is no fat man that comes down the chimney with presents, that "Santa" is a nice story that reminds people they should be good to each other. I don't feel that I missed out on any childhood experience. I remember feeling happy that I knew something my friends didn't. Plus I would have been really angry that I had been lied too (I always hated that, even when I was a little kid). I'm not sure why my mom told me the truth from the beginning (probably to avoid questions like "what about people who don't have chimney's???), but if I have kids I know I'll tell them the truth about Santa from the beginning too.

[kitalyn414]

i am glad to hear that starfish. christmas was always such a magical time for me, that i would hate to take that from my kids. however, i don't want to lie to them. i was super precocious when i was little, so when i found at that santa wasn't real i was furious and so hurt. i was mad that i hadn't been smart enough to figure it out for myself, and hurt that my parents lied to me. then i had to lie to my brother about it. that wasn't so bad because i knew as long as he still believed in santa, i would continue to get the presents. WHAT A GREEDY LITTLE KID! i don't want my children to think like that. it's okay to lie to someone you love as long as you are getting something out of it. yuck!

maybe i should consider judaism.

[pisces2473]

I remember that I wasn't crushed after I found out that Santa wasn't real. I figured it out on my own very early. Also, my parents always said that Santa didn't wrap and only brought toys--later I learned that this was because there were too many little things to wrap up, compared with clothing! My parents had an answer to everything, lol. I've thought about not talking about Santa with my kids, because I'm afraid it's verging on being deceitful, but as my aunt (a kindergarten teacher for over 30 years) said, "Santa is a part of American culture. Your kids will find out about him, even if you never talk about him." She's right, I guess...

[tarawvu]

I don't see anything wrong with telling kids about Santa. It's a simple little escape from reality. I find things become boring if they're so cut and dry. Like someone else said, Santa is part of the magic of childhood. The best thing about being a kid is imagination, creativity and the wonder of magic. I couldn't bear to take these highlights from my kids. I'm 24 and Christmas is still my favorite time of the year. I love the decorations, music, and spirit.

[klo1335]

In my area there was a local 1st grade teacher who told her students that santa wasn't real. Why she did this, I have no idea. But the parents went into a rage! The school brought in "santa" to show the kids that he is real. And as for telling or not telling santa isn't real, I think it has to do with the parents. And when you are a kid you are more excepting of things. I honestly don't even remember how I acted when I found out he wasn't real. So it probably wasn't that tramatic and I think I turned out ok and my parents did the whole santa thing.