What to do in this situation?

[Kitty]

The Director of Marketing's husband recently had a pretty major stroke. She's been out of the office for two weeks and will probably be out for at least 3 more. I don't have her home address to send her a card or whatnot, and obviously it wouldn't be appropriate to send an email. Do you think it's OK to ask HR for her address? And if I get her address..what should I send aside from a card?

[mishl982]

Could you get other coworkers in on it and get flowers? Whenever someone in our office (or a customer we are close with) suffers a loss, we all pitch in and get flowers. Usually someone there knows the home address of the person.

[Kitty]

Yeah, I'm probably late in the game though - since it's already been two weeks. I guess I should just ask around for her address.

[TinyDancer]

I would go with flowers, too. Maybe your HR will give her address, but I normally don't give out people's stuff. . . but if HR won't give it out, hopefully someone else will have it.

Being late in the game is okay. They probably got a ton of stuff up front. . . now cards and such are probably dwindling, but they still need support and encouragement.

[J-girl]

Can the HR lady call her up and ask her if its okay to forward her address to you guys.

[weary]

i second the HR/address suggestions.

when someone has a loved one in the hospital or sick long-term we usually send a card and then some sort of basket w/ food (like harry & david, edible arrangements, cookie blooms, etc.) instead of flowers. the family appreciates it and has something to munch on other than icky hospital cafeteria food. even if they're at home, it can be nice.

[AshleyJordan]

I agree. This happened at my last job and HR had the address. Also, do you (or a colleague in your dept.) have a copy of her resume? For example, since I have to write blurbs about my org's staff, I have copies of everyone's resume, which also has everyone's address-- although, arguably, maybe not their most recent one.

[tina1979]

I have to agree with the flowers and food. I know flowers can definitely brighten a day when it is not expected, but very much needed.