Confusion and Anxiety

[Shannon]

I graduated from the university of denver in 2000 with a degree in business and have yet to get my life together. I thought it would be much easier. Graduate, get a job, start earning money, start saving money, move up in the company etc. It has been anything but that. Got a job in the Telecom sector and thought life would be great working for a .com ya right? Learned that the hard way when I worked my butt off and got an award for 2 months then was laid off. Couldn't find another job in telecommunications or high speed internet access so I went into real estate. I had all these hopes and dreams and they have been crush becasue the real estate market is terrible in Denver. Now I am looking into property management and considering moving to chicago. My boyfriend is originally from Chicago and I don't know if I should stay in Denver, the place that I love or move to chicago. Or if I should continue my search in Denver or move back to my home state of Michigan. I have never been so confused and frustrated. I am so scared and full of anxiety. Does anyone else feel similar? Has anyone been through something like this? Any suggestions?

[crazy-girl]

I feel the way you feel. Some days it feels like my head is going to explode. I graduated with a degree in broadcast journalism, managed to get a job, worked in the field for 3 years and realized I hated it. I was having panic attacks and would cry on the way to work---well, as soon as I decided to look around for a new job and field of work---the economy went into the toilet. I'm now working as a secretary. I graduated with honors! I had my own column in my student newspaper. I won two media awards from my college my senior year and just three years later I'm having to put things in envelopes. Sometimes I just have so much anxiety I can't breathe. I have no idea what I should do. Should I move back home? Should I move to a new city or should I stay here?
I wish I had some advice for you. Sometimes I feel like some sort of therapy would help me out but my crappy HMO doesn't cover it.

[Shannon]

DEAR CRAZY GIRL,
I know exactly how you feel in terms of anxiety. I have felt so full of anxiety lately that I was in the hospital with a severe panic attack and thought I was having a heart attack. It sucks. I feel what you are going through. i am just so glad that I found this site cause I thought that I was the only one going through such a period in my life. Thanks for your reply.
shannon

[Unregistered]

A couple good QLC movies (hey, they make me feel better!) are Reality Bites and Office Space. I think it's important to laugh at yourself once and a while. I think instead of those utterly horrible high school movies,they should be more movies showing what people in their 20s really go through!

[crazy-girl]

Office Space has to be one of the BEST qlc movies out there. I empathize with that guy so much. Favorite part is when he says

"I don't like going to work so I don't think I'm going to do it anymore."

and Jennifer Aniston says "but what will you do for money? how will you pay bills?"

the response, "Yeah, I never really liked paying bills so I don't think I'm going to do that either"

[Phoenix]

I agree -- both are good QLC movies. I had seen Reality Bites quite a few times before graduation but I felt like I really GOT when I watched it post-college. I think a lot of us are experiencing more anxiety than we normally would right now because we graduated at a really bad time (2000, 2001) - when the economy and job market took a bit hit. I often wonder if our outlook would at least be slightly improved if we had the added advantage of an upswing. I hope things will look up when the economy improves a bit, at least.

[Unregistered]

For anyone with a nervous disorder, who can't afford therapy, "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook" by Edmund J. Bourne might be helpful. Therapists use this book in their practice. No human being deserves to have to constantly experience the sensations associated with anxiety. I don't have the words to describe my outrage at the fact that certain insurance plans don't cover treatment for what does not appear to some people to be visible, bodily diseases or injuries. But at least today nervous disorders are starting to be recognized... as something that affects people's productivity, their contribution to the economy etc... (therefore it's in the employer's best interest that these disorders be treated).

[Unregistered]

Hi, I am new to this forum and having trouble registering. But, I am in search for some support! After reading many of your posts, I no longer feel alone. I am a Registered Nurse now working as a Pharmaceutical sales rep, and hating it! I work, go home, work some more, go to sleep, get up, go to work. I am twenty-five, wanting to find my dream career, and somehow make tons of money before I start a family! I hate my job so much that I clench the steering wheel while I drive all day, and experience for the first time in my life, anxiety attacks. I am at my wits end and see no light at the end of the tunnel. I no longer fantasize about being swept up by a prince. Unfortunately, I am madly in love with soemone who makes a little more than I do. My dream is now to be swept up by some head hunter who will take me away from my terrible job! I hope I am not alone. I just can't seem to find support from friends. They pretend everything is alright by going out all weekend to forget their problems while I try to mend mine. Anyone else out there like me?

[Shannon]

Dear Unregistered,
I am sorry that you are having problems registering but I am glad that you found it as I have only been her a couple weeks and feel immense support. I am sorry that you hate your job so much. I looked into going into pharm. sales and thought it was the perfect job. 401k, car, free gas, etc. I was thinking of going into that because it was a sales job that didn't offer 100% commission which is the situation that I am in right now and hating it. I have anxiety attacks too and know exactly what you are going through. They are the worst. I went to the hospital because I thought that I was having a heart attack. My heart was beating out of its socket, sweating, felt fait and dizzy, my pulse was racing, and when they took my blood pressure it was 175/125. Way to high for a 24 year old. Please don't feel like you are going through this alone. Many people are, especially those that just graduated like yourself because so much has changed in terms of our economy. I would say to try and look on the bright side like at least you have a job because many of us don't, however I know how it feels to have a job that you absolutley hate, makes you sick and you dread it. Are you looking for other interviews in other areas? If you are really miserable you could just quit and do temping? I hope that things get better for you and welcome. Sincerely, Shannon

[crazywillie]

I am too looking for some headhunter to sweep me off my feet, that was funnny. I just keep my nose to the grindstone, always looking for my career job to open up.

As for the same old routine, get used to it...it is called life. But what is to say that you can't go to dinner with friends or significant other once a week to break up the monotony. Or go grab a beer, or go bowling with a huge group? Just get out of the house, living with roommates is great for me because I never feel totally alone. I also live on a small street in a young part of the city, so on any given day I can walk up or down the street and hang out with 10 or so friends.

That was the key to breaking up the monotony of work/life...to move somewhere near a lot of my friends and live in a really hip area with a lot going on in walking distance. That has helped make things smooth in my life, especially when I consider the fact that my job is not fulfilling.

[crazy-girl]

You have to break the monotony. It's not just monotony but depression and you don't want to stay there. It is hard to get out of it. After working at a crappy night shift job for 3 years I finally have my nights back and at first I had to make an effort to call people to get drinks after work or see a movie but after a while I got used to it. It's still sort of exhausting to make the effort but I'm happier.

[Unregistered]

Hey, that's the story of my post-college life, "what the hell am i supposed to do now." Yeah, my adult life is not quite what I imagined it would be and sometimes I feel like I don't know what I am doing with my career. There are so many choices and things to do professionally that I can't really narrow it down. My major in college was business admin. (very broad!!) and I still don't know what I am going to do. All I know is that I want to succeed but I don't want to waste five years of my life trying to figure out what I want to do. Also, it sucks that entry level pay is soo low. It's kind of disheartnening.