Pretty Girl Syndrome

[and1grad]

Do any of you have any friends with "Pretty Girl Syndrome"? I'm sure you've all seen it, or done it, but its that whole dynamic of a pretty girl thinking she can get away with all kinds of shit for the simple fact that she's pretty. I have a friend who pulls this ALL THE TIME and its crazy annoying. She does the whole cutesy routine and suckers guys into giving her free stuff and letting her get away with almost anything. I'm not even sure if I'm more annoyed by her doing it or the fact that dumb guys fall for it. The kicker? She'll come back from getting whatever it is she wants from her targeted sap and say "Can you BELIEVE he asked me out? Ugh." :googly:

[Winter Storm]

Ha! Yeah, I know tons of girls like this. They expect to get into everywhere free, get free drinks and basically be pampered in every area. They are the ones that say "Look at him and look at me. I'm so out of his league"

Not me at all. I still bring my own cash to every event and date.

[wordsmith]

I think I'd want to knock her lights out regularly, were I acquainted with her. I wouldn't, of course. But I'd sure feel like it occasionally.

Same, except I'd probably just end up avoiding being around her a lot of the time. My cousin acts like this, and we don't socialize. It's basically being insincere and manipulative, and I have a low tolerance for both.

[Kitty]

I know a few people who operate like this, and they aren't even pretty.

[Krishna]

Yeah...I know people like that. One of my roommates used to do that non-stop. It drove me nuts, and I had to lock myself in my room on several occasions to refrain from hitting her.

[WorkInProgress]

I know a few people who operate like this, and they aren't even pretty.

I only briefly (thank goodness) met the one of my cousin's bridesmaids who this describes perfectly. No shit, on the way out, my brother said, "you know, she's really not pretty enough to be like that" and everyone in the car (parents, grandparents) agreed.

[wordsmith]

My freshman year roommate was one of these girls, come to think of it. I've blocked most of it out, because she was such a twit and looked like a bit of Disney Princess animation.

She definitely did the whole, "OH MY GOD, can you BELIEVE he likes me?????" thing, and I'm like, "Yes, yes I can, considering you've been letting him hang out here and rub your feet while you study for weeks" (not kidding, and the kicker was that they used MY peppermint foot lotion).

[and1grad]

I think I'd want to knock her lights out regularly, were I acquainted with her. I wouldn't, of course. But I'd sure feel like it occasionally.
Its a more disbelief "I cant believe that worked again" feeling. I cant get the lady at the register to spot me a nickel rather than give me 95 cents back.

[Bocheezu]

There's a girl like that at work here. Really hot (married), she gets people to help her and do stuff for her, but she doesn't go overboard with it to the point that it's obvious. She plays the act just enough to manipulate people as much as she can. Just a few smiles here and a little girly laugh there. She knows the boundaries pretty well.

That's the scary part about it -- it's not the hot dumb ones I worry about, because you can see right through them, it's the SMART ones that I pay very careful attention to, because I know I'm a vulnerable guy for that sort of stuff and I can be manipulated very easily.

People wonder why I have a hard time trusting women -- it's because I'm not stupid and I know that sort of shit happens all the time.

[Kitty]

(not kidding, and the kicker was that they used MY peppermint foot lotion).


Ok, that seriously had me laughing out loud!!!

[PenforPrez]

I've had it happen to me a couple of times, but I've never seen it happen to anybody else. All the pretty women I know are all in fairly healthy relationships.

I guess I am a sucker after all. :rolleyes:

Paul

[weary]

I know a few people who operate like this, and they aren't even pretty.
LOL, kitty!!!

[wordsmith]

It's one of my mom's favorite "Jessie's Prima Donna Bitch Roommate" stories, still, more than ten years after the fact.

She also was CONSTANTLY posing. Literally. Even if she was lounging on a piece of dorm furniture in the commons area, it was a studied pose...toes pointed, flattering, affected posturing. Girlfriend was ALWAYS ready for her closeup. Thing is, she wasn't really even all that pretty. One of those people who looks cute enough from afar, but up close, kind of a mess. If memory serves, her mouth was somewhere between Steven Tyler and Cesar Romero as The Joker.

[Kitty]

LOL, kitty!!!

It's true. One of them was my housemate in college. She was short, chubby, had bad acne, dressed like a tomboy, and look generally plain-Jane and even SHE was expecting this type of treatment; guys tripping over themselves to do things for her.

[embrassezla]

I definitely, definitely am not afflicted with such a thing; I look like a total slob 80% of the time so I'm not even a candidate. But my now SO told me early on when we were dating that I pulled the "dumb pretty girl" routine on him on our first date, and he thought it was cute. I did NO SUCH THING consciously, but he didn't believe me. He just said, "Don't worry, it worked!"

But if you're posing on a dorm commons couch, you might be Mariah Carey.

[Kitty]

But if you're posing on a dorm commons couch, you might be Mariah Carey.

LOL!!

[wordsmith]

Snort.

[MetFanL]

LOL... I have to admit, I know I sometimes get special treatment. However, I don't expect it and I didn't realize it was stuff that other people didn't get until very recently.

I will say, though, that I boys to hold a door open for me and girls to give me the "flip." But, that's just a pet peeve or mine and it's simply common courtesy. Of course, I always hold the door for others and I always say thank you.

[weary]

this thread is really funny to me. i've known a couple girls like this, and it would just really make me wonder where they lost their scruples. i mean, this one girl i knew would actually be shopping and say shit like, "i love these shoes. i'm going to have to come back with [insert her flavour of the month man here] and make him buy them for me." and she would, and the guy would [buy them]!!! :eek:

i don't get it. the chicks or the dudes. i'll accept a drink at the bar if offered, or trinkets from a friend...but i don't solicit! :rolleyes:

[wordsmith]

My sister is actually something of a drink mooch. She doesn't solicit drinks from guys in bars, really, just takes what's offered, but she does expect that she'll probably not pay for much when she goes out. And she's a great one for COMPLETELY not talking to the guy after he buys her a drink, too.

[meatwad]

Yeah, when I was 20 I might go out of my way if a cute girl came into the store or asked a favor. But I realized pretty quick that I didn't like being used and since I wasn't getting anything out of the deal they could get they own damn sammich.

[weary]

oh...but if we're doing full disclosure, i will absolutely admit to using it to try to get out of a traffic ticket!!! i mean, c'mon, why does a huge city (NY) have an across the board no right on red rule? that's just stupid. some streets...o-k. all? no. or post it EVERYWHERE.

and lucky for me, every time i'm driving there (even when i lived there), it's w/ out of state tags.

in my best ashley banks/california girl voice: "really mr. officer? it's a rule throughout the city? i wonder why it's not posted, what with this being such a tourist city. i had nooooo idea!" *eylash bat, eylash bat...broad smile* worked every time. :p

[wordsmith]

I find running the newspaper has gotten me out of tickets, locally at least. Power over looks, baby.

[weary]

But if you're posing on a dorm commons couch, you might be Mariah Carey.
who's definitely not pretty. unless you're into plastic. and botox frozen faces.

i think she looks like a blonde mon-chi-chi.

[weary]

I find running the newspaper has gotten me out of tickets, locally at least. Power over looks, baby.
but YOU'VE GOT THE LOOKS!


sho look groovy cookin', in my booook! :p

[wordsmith]

but YOU'VE GOT THE LOOKS!


sho look groovy cookin', in my booook! :p

Hah, thanks, but trust me, it's def. the position.

[meatwad]

Hah, thanks, but trust me, it's def. the position.

Which one's your favorite? :evil:

[Kitty]

Anyway, my point was more that you don't have to be pretty to get these kinds of treatments. You just have to be flirtatious, slutty, suggestive, <insert your favorite adjective>. If a dude thinks there's a chance he's getting action, or he's getting off on the fact that someone's flirting with him, etc. -- most likely he'll be willing to do x, y, or z thing. I'm doubting it has much to do with truly being a hot.

[PenforPrez]

I will say, though, that I boys to hold a door open for me and girls to give me the "flip." But, that's just a pet peeve or mine and it's simply common courtesy. Of course, I always hold the door for others and I always say thank you.

I do that out in public as common courtesy. Some people appreciate it, others don't. I like to think it sets me apart from most people. :)

Paul

[Kitty]

Yeah, that's a weird social thing. Whenever we go out in public, people always hold the door open for me and then D kinda walks behind me and they hold it open for him too since they were holding it open for me. One time he commented, "Damn, EVERYONE opens the door for you!!" I was like, "People don't do that for you?" and he said no, that almost no one opens/holds the door for him..ever. I honestly thought that was just a common courtesy thing and that everyone did it.

[wordsmith]

Anyway, my point was more that you don't have to be pretty to get these kinds of treatments. You just have to be flirtatious, slutty, suggestive, <insert your favorite adjective>. If a dude thinks there's a chance he's getting action, or he's getting off on the fact that someone's flirting with him, etc. -- most likely he'll be willing to do x, y, or z thing. I'm doubting it has much to do with truly being a hot.

True that. You basically just need the attitude that you're entitled to special treatment. That and the fact that "hot or not" is pretty subjective.

[dreams82]

I have a friend who is obsessed with herself. Everywhere we go she wants to take close up shots, and usually I am just like, no way. I like to take an occasional picture when I am out with my friends, and especially if I feel like I am looking good, but not all the time! She is a beautiful girl, but it just gets old.

[Kitty]

True that. You basically just need the attitude that you're entitled to special treatment. That and the fact that "hot or not" is pretty subjective.

Yup. It's definitely an attitude thing more than anything else.

[Bocheezu]

I honestly thought that was just a common courtesy thing and that everyone did it.

Most guys do it, but a lot of women don't even look behind them to see if anyone's there. They just open the door and...go. I almost never see a guy do that. Guys might look behind them, assess that the person is too far to be bothered with, and proceed on. And maybe that distance is smaller for some guys compared to others. But they at least look behind them a majority of the time.

[pisces2473]

I didn't realize it was stuff that other people didn't get until very recently.
Can I just ask...how you found this out? I'm curious ;)

[weary]

Most guys do it, but a lot of women don't even look behind them to see if anyone's there. They just open the door and...go. I almost never see a guy do that. Guys might look behind them, assess that the person is too far to be bothered with, and proceed on. And maybe that distance is smaller for some guys compared to others. But they at least look behind them a majority of the time.
u think so? my experience has been the opposite. i find that women are always looking back/holding the door behind them if someone is coming in right after, whereas guys (and kids/teens) just walk in and keep going. now when someone is coming out while you're walking in, it seems to be pretty equal. at least in my experience....with strangers. when i'm with a guy, they usually open the door.

[Kitty]

Can I just ask...how you found this out? I'm curious ;)

Sounds like you're baiting to me!

[Winter Storm]

Most guys do it, but a lot of women don't even look behind them to see if anyone's there. They just open the door and...go. I almost never see a guy do that. Guys might look behind them, assess that the person is too far to be bothered with, and proceed on. And maybe that distance is smaller for some guys compared to others. But they at least look behind them a majority of the time.

I always open doors for guys. But then again, I have a tendency to do a lot of the "guy" stuff in dating, like paying, buying gifts, initiating things and doing a lot of the wooing, which has probably been part of my downfall. :0

[cache]

I've actually rolled my eyes in a very noticeable way when a woman does that around me. Then I get the "OK, so you know, please don't spoil this for me" look.

[pisces2473]

Sounds like you're baiting to me!
Baiting whom?

No, I'm serious how one finds out that not everyone gets treated like that.

[Winter Storm]

I've actually rolled my eyes in a very noticeable way when a woman does that around me. Then I get the "OK, so you know, please don't spoil this for me" look.

What do you mean, cache?

[and1grad]

Guys might look behind them, assess that the person is too far to be bothered with, and proceed on. And maybe that distance is smaller for some guys compared to others. But they at least look behind them a majority of the time.
This made me laugh cuz I had to leave a lady who was practically running to the door yesterday. She was still too far and its an hour b/w shuttles so I had to keep it moving. I felt bad tho. :0

[pisces2473]

I just can't imagine what it's like...thinking that everyone gets treated nicely AND the shock to find out that people don't.

I'm in the "doors slammed" camp, so I am used to people being rude and whatever to me.

[Kitty]

Well, if something ALWAYS happens to you (like everyone always opens the door for you), why would you assume that it's NOT normal? You go off your own experiences. I honestly just thought it was a common courtesy thing..and there wasn't really reason to believe otherwise. It wasn't until D pointed it out, that it came to my attention.

[embrassezla]

I hate when I hold a door for someone and they're like, "Oh, gonna make me run huh?" So now I only hold it if the person is <2s behind me.

[Kitty]

I hate when I hold a door for someone and they're like, "Oh, gonna make me run huh?" So now I only hold it if the person is <2s behind me.

I run into this issue all the time. The side door to our building requires a key, and not everyone has the key. I have the key and a lot of times I'll see someone about 50 feet away walking toward the door and I'm always like, "Should i just wait here for them? Or should I close the door making them have to get out their key, etc."

[Winter Storm]

Well, if something ALWAYS happens to you (like everyone always opens the door for you), why would you assume that it's NOT normal? You go off your own experiences. I honestly just thought it was a common courtesy thing..and there wasn't really reason to believe otherwise. It wasn't until D pointed it out, that it came to my attention.

Yeah same here. I don't think I really understood that it was any preferential treatment until I took sociology in college and learned about the halo/horns effect. Wrote a paper on it.

[Bocheezu]

I think people should show a little hustle sometimes. If I'm holding the door for you and you're not elderly, speed walk up there. Same thing with people crossing streets. Dude, I'm trying to make a right turn and you're the only person holding me up, show a little hustle and get across the damn street already.

As far as door holding distance goes, I will wait for around up to 8-10 feet on occasion (this is at work where you can have such distances). If they're much beyond that, I half-assly kind of throw the door at them. It's sort of like saying "I tried. I really did. But you were just too far away. And I have to go now."

[pisces2473]

Halos and horns?

[Kitty]

I think people should show a little hustle sometimes. If I'm holding the door for you and you're not elderly, speed walk up there. Same thing with people crossing streets. Dude, I'm trying to make a right turn and you're the only person holding me up, show a little hustle and get across the damn street already.

As far as door holding distance goes, I will wait for around up to 8-10 feet on occasion (this is at work where you can have such distances). If they're much beyond that, I half-assly kind of throw the door at them. It's sort of like saying "I tried. I really did. But you were just too far away. And I have to go now."

LOL...this sounds like it could be a Seinfeld episode.

[Kitty]

To be honest, though, I don't consider door opening/holding (or the expectation thereof) to be "Pretty Girl Syndrome," like what we've been talking about upthread.

It's not...I think we got off-topic! What else is new? :p

[weary]

Halos and horns?
S&M foreplay ritual...
:evil:

[Winter Storm]

Halos and horns?

Hmm, I was trying to find a good link of this but came up short.

Yeah the Halo effect refers to the cognitive bias people have towards attractive people. They are often treated better and perceived to be better based solely on looks. It is a natural, human bias found as young as in infancy.

The Horns effect would be the opposite, where unattractive people aren't treated as well and percieved negatively or indifferent.

[WorkInProgress]

Hmm, I was trying to find a good link of this but came up short.

Yeah the Halo effect refers to the cognitive bias people have towards attractive people. They are often treated better and perceived to be better based solely on looks. It is a natural, human bias found as young as in infancy.

The Horns effect would be the opposite, where unattractive people aren't treated as well and percieved negatively or indifferent.

I'd never heard of it referred to that way, but I've definitely heard of this concept. It's part of why "bad guys" in literature (and cartoons) are often ugly or deformed, and why "good guys" are so visually attractive. Or something.

[WorkInProgress]

S&M foreplay ritual...
:evil:

Or theme party!

[weary]

Or theme party!
hehe heh hehe....yeah, that sounds better. :D

[Winter Storm]

I'd never heard of it referred to that way, but I've definitely heard of this concept. It's part of why "bad guys" in literature (and cartoons) are often ugly or deformed, and why "good guys" are so visually attractive. Or something.

That's probably why I can't find info on it on Google. That was probably the example used in our textbook. Who knew?

[Kitty]

I'd never heard of it referred to that way, but I've definitely heard of this concept. It's part of why "bad guys" in literature (and cartoons) are often ugly or deformed, and why "good guys" are so visually attractive. Or something.

What about SHREK!?!?!?!

[WorkInProgress]

That's probably why I can't find info on it on Google. That was probably the example used in our textbook. Who knew?

If they used that for the example they probably used Richard III being deformed as the specific illustration. It's the one everyone seems to use in English classes to illlustrate this point.

[embrassezla]

What about SHREK!?!?!?!
DAHAHA seriously.

This thread is offensive to Shrek.

[WorkInProgress]

What about SHREK!?!?!?!

Often. And that's part of the irony in that movie (which I love, btw, and can't believe I don't own).

[WorkInProgress]

DAHAHA seriously.

This thread is offensive to Shrek.

But Shrek isn't here, and if he were, he'd have to gripe to a mod. ;):

[mishl982]

I love Shrek!

And Gingy! "The buttons! Not the gumdrop buttons!" and "He's wearing a thongggg!!"

Okay I'm done being random for the day... or for now :)

[MetFanL]

Well, someone else already said it, but I was having a convo w/ a co-worker a few weeks ago. We used to have a guard outside our door and they had to buzz you in. Well, they'd always get up and hold the door for me. ANd, I never took out my ID. I just figured it was b/c I'm in and out of there a million times a day, so they know me and don't bother. However, my co-worker was just like, no, I have to show my ID everytime. And, yeah, they don't get up and hold the door -- they just push the button. So, then we got talking about other stuff around here and I kind of realized that what I perceived to be common courtesy really wasn't *just* that.

[pisces2473]

Is there a diff. btwn you and this coworker? Male vs. female? Ugly vs. attractive? Minority vs. white?

[MetFanL]

Is there a diff. btwn you and this coworker? Male vs. female? Ugly vs. attractive? Minority vs. white?
It's another woman, but she's a couple years older than me. Not by a ton, though. And, she's not ugly, but she's not stunning or anything (not that I am).

[Kitty]

It's another woman, but she's a couple years older than me. Not by a ton, though. And, she's not ugly, but she's not stunning or anything (not that I am).

I really think the root of it is a confidence/presentation thing.

[MetFanL]

I really think the root of it is a confidence/presentation thing.
It definitely is. All the guards know my name and I know theirs... I talk to EVERYONE around here, smile at everyone, etc. My co-worker does not. I think that has more to do with it than the way either of us look. I PROJECT a confident/friendly/happy vibe.

[pisces2473]

There you go! Makes sense.

[coll214]

I really think the root of it is a confidence/presentation thing.
I think so too... I've had both; sometimes people helping others the door slammed in the face :rolleyes:.

[WorkInProgress]

I really think the root of it is a confidence/presentation thing.

I think some of it is. I think that the other person invovled is another part of it, though.

[and1grad]

I think some of it is. I think that the other person invovled is another part of it, though.
Gotta know your audience.

[eastcoaster782]

Do any of you have any friends with "Pretty Girl Syndrome"? I'm sure you've all seen it, or done it, but its that whole dynamic of a pretty girl thinking she can get away with all kinds of shit for the simple fact that she's pretty. I have a friend who pulls this ALL THE TIME and its crazy annoying. She does the whole cutesy routine and suckers guys into giving her free stuff and letting her get away with almost anything. I'm not even sure if I'm more annoyed by her doing it or the fact that dumb guys fall for it. The kicker? She'll come back from getting whatever it is she wants from her targeted sap and say "Can you BELIEVE he asked me out? Ugh." :googly:

I've unfortunately run into these types as well. But the effects of aging will be the ultimate revenge. Muh, ha, ha...:evil: :D

[CTGirl]

Hmm, I was trying to find a good link of this but came up short.

Yeah the Halo effect refers to the cognitive bias people have towards attractive people. They are often treated better and perceived to be better based solely on looks. It is a natural, human bias found as young as in infancy.

The Horns effect would be the opposite, where unattractive people aren't treated as well and percieved negatively or indifferent.

From what I remember of my degree in psych, what you're saying here is an example of halo and horns, not really a definition. It doesnt always have to be about appearance.

[nicole06]

A girl I was going to live with from college actually confessed to doing something like this. She didn't outright say she used her looks, but she is kinda cute so I'm sure it helps. She was telling me about how she could get this really awesome tv/surround sound system from this guy for only $400, even though he paid over $1000 for it. She told me how she did that a lot; she knows guys who likes her so she just uses them to get stuff she wants. I'm glad we didn't end up living together. I have a hard time even getting dates - I think I'd want to strangle her for just stringing these perfectly nice guys along for no good reason.

[asm198]

My last two female friends acted exactly like this. Both felt that they were physically perfect and that gave them permission to treat people badly. If I had a nickel for every time I heard either one of them say something about how 'whoever' should feel honored that they were allowed in my friends presence or that they talked to the person, I'd be rich.

Which is pretty much the reason I am no longer friends with either one of them. I've found that when people act like that, drama follows them around and drama gets on my nerves.

[veniqe]

Guys buy me stuff most of the time.


I'll go to a restaurant or a coffee store and the waiter will start giving me stuff for free. On one particular night, I got 2 shots of Tequila, 2 cocktails and 2 pots of tea for free. I didn't act helpless or stupid or silly at all.



If I go to a club and I'm having a good time, yes, there will probably be someone who'll want to buy me a drink about half the time. If I'm sending bad vibes by not enjoying myself, no one will talk to me or even look at me. It doesn't always happen and I don't expect it to.



If it does happen, I'll chat to him(often them) for a bit but I'm not obliged to do much more.



I don't think it's just my looks that makes this happen. I'm sure it's my personality. I smile and act friendly towards people around me. I'm considerate and other people can pick up on that.

[KCboy]

......

[and1grad]

I've found that when people act like that, drama follows them around and drama gets on my nerves.
Definitely true. I've found that ALL of the girls I know who do this seem to be mixed up in some kind of absurd drama. They also seem to have REALLY "interesting" taste when it comes to the men they DO like.

[asm198]

Guys buy me stuff most of the time.


I'll go to a restaurant or a coffee store and the waiter will start giving me stuff for free. On one particular night, I got 2 shots of Tequila, 2 cocktails and 2 pots of tea for free. I didn't act helpless or stupid or silly at all.



If I go to a club and I'm having a good time, yes, there will probably be someone who'll want to buy me a drink about half the time. If I'm sending bad vibes by not enjoying myself, no one will talk to me or even look at me. It doesn't always happen and I don't expect it to.



If it does happen, I'll chat to him(often them) for a bit but I'm not obliged to do much more.



I don't think it's just my looks that makes this happen. I'm sure it's my personality. I smile and act friendly towards people around me. I'm considerate and other people can pick up on that.

It's not about having guys buy you stuff. I've had my fair share of drinks bought for me at bars and I don't see any problem with it. If they offer and I accept, then that's fine. The issue is when women decide that they are entitled to that stuff, for whatever reason. They know that if they bat their eyelashes or flirt a bit, they can con guys into thinking they are interested so that they guys will buy them stuff, but in reality they are mocking and making fun of these guys for being stupid enough to fall for it.

That's simply a shitty thing to do to someone. Accept a drink if a guy offers it, but begging for free drinks is just lame. I've also found that women who consistantly do that are severely lacking in self-esteem. They demand the full attention of everyone they come in contact with and if they don't get it, they either get pissed off or create ridiculous "life and death" drama to make sure they get the attention they want and need.

[wordsmith]

I've also found that women who consistantly do that are severely lacking in self-esteem. They demand the full attention of everyone they come in contact with and if they don't get it, they either get pissed off or create ridiculous "life and death" drama to make sure they get the attention they want and need.

Yep...it's an attentionwhore thing. It's also these people who are SURE to point out that they got drinks bought for them/stuff bought for them/"people just keep treating me," usually repeatedly. It's like it's seen as some sort of tangible badge of honor that they're "liked," or sought after, and they want to make sure that that's not lost on anybody. Definitely a self-esteem/emotional issue.

[zen_mistress]

On the weekend a barman was standing outside his bar and as we (3 girls) were walking past he invited us in... it was a on quiet restaurant strip and the bars were quiet...

he made us these fabulous free drinks... I took some photos... he made the drinks partly i think because he was trying to get my friends phone number... I took some photos of these drinks, and some hilarious photos of my friend which I wont post...

They just looked great. Frozen bacardi and juice cocktails. Id definitely like to go back to this bar and chat more to this guy... it was so cool...

[wordsmith]

he made the drinks partly i think because he was trying to get my friends phone number...

And also to try to drum up repeat business. Don't think this isn't in good part a business strategy, too. A guy I know's got a fledgling bar, and if you flatter groups of girls, they come in regularly with their friends and spend money.

[asm198]

And also to try to drum up repeat business. Don't think this isn't in good part a business strategy, too. A guy I know's got a fledgling bar, and if you flatter groups of girls, they come in regularly with their friends and spend money.

Bingo. A bar I was a regular at post college had ladies night on Thursdays. There was a $5 cover and women could drink anything they wanted except bottled beer and shots for free all night long. Whatever beer they had on tap and any mixed drink you wanted, except with the premium liqours, were free. If you got there past 9:30, you were standing outside for at least 45 minutes, no matter what time of the year.

I've found that if you get the girls to come someplace, the guys will follow, so places are 'nice' to the girls.

[zen_mistress]

Yes i think it was a bit of both. The bartender did seem interested in my friend though. And he did get a chance to demonstrate his theatrical bartending skills.. it was great watching him make the drinks... he put 3 shining martini glasses in front of us and made the elaborate cocktails for us.

C
~

[Syracuse]

Hey life can be tough, get your hustle on if you can, if you can because you're a pretty girl go ahead. But looks don't last so don't rely on your looks it comes back to bite you. That's why if I see a girl who is pretty but an idiot or rude relying on her beauty I don't stress too much because I know she'll most likely be a miserable divorcee someday wondering what went wrong.

[redav]

Bingo. A bar I was a regular at post college had ladies night on Thursdays. There was a $5 cover and women could drink anything they wanted except bottled beer and shots for free all night long. Whatever beer they had on tap and any mixed drink you wanted, except with the premium liqours, were free.
Ah, but the NJ supreme court ruled that 'Ladies Nights' are discriminatory, and therefore unconstitutional. I don't recall any other state jumping on board with it, though.

[asm198]

Ah, but the NJ supreme court ruled that 'Ladies Nights' are discriminatory, and therefore unconstitutional. I don't recall any other state jumping on board with it, though.

Good thing I don't live in NJ, then. :)

[zz4guy]

Do any of you have any friends with "Pretty Girl Syndrome"? I'm sure you've all seen it, or done it, but its that whole dynamic of a pretty girl thinking she can get away with all kinds of shit for the simple fact that she's pretty. I have a friend who pulls this ALL THE TIME and its crazy annoying. She does the whole cutesy routine and suckers guys into giving her free stuff and letting her get away with almost anything. I'm not even sure if I'm more annoyed by her doing it or the fact that dumb guys fall for it. The kicker? She'll come back from getting whatever it is she wants from her targeted sap and say "Can you BELIEVE he asked me out? Ugh." :googly:

Hell yeah I love those girls. They're HOT!! :D

[zen_mistress]

I guess there is someone for all types, LOL.

Anyway Im glad I got a chance to post my cocktail pic. I dont get bought drinks often... I think guys think im some sort of feminist/ballbreaker type. It was an event when it happened! I buy my own beers usually... though in Europe it is different as people buy each other's drinks in "rounds".

[Ciderhillnh]

I have not read this entire thread, but I get the jist.

Sadly, as a society we are told that being pretty is important, and if you are pretty, you can be afforded opportunities based on looks, and not always the talent that goes along with it.

Ive known many girls who use their looks to their advantage and even if they arent getting the job done, or arent doing the course work (such as in college) thy would manipulate their way into being forgiven or given more time or it being brushed under the carpet.

While these girls will have their looks fade (or for some not at all) they are MASTER manipulaters and with this skill they continue to get through life and obtain what they desire.

Now, whats also sad about this, is that girls like that give other pretty girls who are kind, work hard etc a bad rep and can be judged that they are pretty but stupid and treated as such. Those girls have to work twice as hard because they don’t manipulate to get what they want, they work hard and can be passed over easily because their looks get in the way.

It can be a double edged sword. Its why Im actually a BIG fan of the phone interview. When I would give phone interviews, I didn’t know what my client sounded like until they came through the door. It was always great when they were smart and attractive, but also just as great if they were smart/articulate and not as attractive, I could sell both based on their strong points, and not on their looks as they might be if they just walked in for an interview.

Im also a fan because I am bright (to toot my own horn) and hard working, but sometimes based on my looks and blonde hair Im not taken as seriously or seen as someone that is of value, so I constantly have to prove myself.

It also comes into play in the dating world. Ive heard it numerous times from my male friends, they wont approach the pretty girl because she probably just wants drinks and will use them, So they typically go for the quiet friend or slightly less pretty girl. They've even gone so far as to tell me this is why I don’t get approached when out, but I think they are just being kind.

Anyway, all I can say is watch for good character, and make sure a girl isnt manipulative, but also keep in mind not all pretty girls do this or act this way.

[wordsmith]

While these girls will have their looks fade (or for some not at all) they are MASTER manipulaters and with this skill they continue to get through life and obtain what they desire.

I think that if your looks alone are the thing gets you a pass, once they're gone, so are the free passes. Nobody cares if you know how to manipulate if you lose the leverage you once had. A homely or average-looking manipulative person will still never get "as far" as an attractive manipulative person. Pretty people who don't ever have to develop the skill or personality to back it up just eventually become nothing really but people who used to be pretty and used to get their way because of it.

[Syracuse]

I once worked in a doctor's office as a temp, and the office manager was the doctor's wife and was a mean old woman. She was mean to all of the secretarys and made a few of them cry. She was nice to me though, and it became a rumor that she had a crush on me. I'm not Brad Pitt but I look ok. So I guess that was handsome boy syndrome. I did kind of try to flirt with her, she was kind of good looking for an older woman.

[freem]

I have a friend like this. We're basically her only female friends because most girls don't want to be around her (as she tends to detract male attention away from others). Thing is, for her own personal games, she usually targets the ones with the low self-esteem and/or mediocre looks to get attention. She doesn't have an overtly loud or outgoing personality but she can act really sweet and girly, and she dresses nicely. It's not that I'm jealous...I'm pretty sure if I acted like that and dressed like that I could do it too. It's just annoying because of her lax morals. Although she feigns innocence (which is probably the most annoying thing), she's a major player and knows exactly what she's doing.

[(an)dy]

Do any of you have any friends with "Pretty Girl Syndrome"? I'm sure you've all seen it, or done it, but its that whole dynamic of a pretty girl thinking she can get away with all kinds of shit for the simple fact that she's pretty. I have a friend who pulls this ALL THE TIME and its crazy annoying. She does the whole cutesy routine and suckers guys into giving her free stuff and letting her get away with almost anything. I'm not even sure if I'm more annoyed by her doing it or the fact that dumb guys fall for it. The kicker? She'll come back from getting whatever it is she wants from her targeted sap and say "Can you BELIEVE he asked me out? Ugh." :googly:

I have a friend who acts like this all the time, only she isn't nearly as attractive as she thinks she is. Which actually is worse.

[wordsmith]

In a way, a not-that-attractive person carring themselves as if they were the hottest person ever is something I admire, because it can speak really highly of that person's confidence. Which is, to me, something way more admirable than looks...pretty's by chance, confidence, you have to grow yourself.

[vinsanity]

In a way, a not-that-attractive person carring themselves as if they were the hottest person ever is something I admire, because it can speak really highly of that person's confidence. Which is, to me, something way more admirable than looks...pretty's by chance, confidence, you have to grow yourself.

Not in the way being described in this thread; from what I gather, we're talking about people with textbook superiority complexes, which to me is that much more puke-inducing when the person's perceived superiority is unfounded.

[wordsmith]

True, as always, the line to walk between confidence and arrogance can be a fine one for some.

In any case, looks or no looks, I can't advocate somebody being an assbag. But the whole, "She/he doesn't even have a RIGHT to think he/she's all that," concept rubs me the wrong way, overall.

[vinsanity]

To be fair, like many, it turns me off as well when an attractive person uses their looks to put down other people, so one redeeming quality is cancelled out by a loathsome one. But when an unattractive person does it, they don't even have the benefit of being unattractive; so they don't even have any redeeming qualities to start off with.

Not that attractiveness counts for much when you have a sour attitude anyways.

[wordsmith]

Yeah, the whole putting others down thing is a whole other level of suckiness, regardless of what the people feel is giving them the "right" to do it.

[koolkat1980]

I think it's all relative really! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! A girl you might consider "Pretty and Gorgeous"....is someone your mate might not find pretty at all! Same goes for the blokes. Some guys I find HOT, other girls cringe and think....gross! "How could you!?"

So perhaps "pretty girl syndrome" is just a constructed / generalised myth. I know some "ugly" girls who are just as awful, mean and bitchy.

I'll also be a devils advocate here and say something else teasingly..... perhaps "pretty girls become bitchy and mean because all of the nastiness and shit the uglies dump on them!" Bawhaahahah! I once heard a girl say: "I've become the bitch I am because of the awful bitches around me!"

For example; say your a female and you were working in a sushi bar and a gorgeous girl comes to be served....then an above average guy comes to be served....I bet you'd serve the bloke first regardless of whether the "Pretty girl" was their first or not. After all, that pretty girl probably has an easy life, gets everything easy and is probably a skanky arse slut, hoe gold-digger. So, serve the bloke first and give her the dirty look whilst I'm at it. That Bitch! She's probably a man-eater slut anyhow. How dare she taller than me and blonde! That bitch!

Perhaps it's not bitchiness.....perhaps it's mere 'survival tactics!' See, I'm an intellectual. Hahah. :) There will ALWAYS be someone out there who's taller, sexier and better than you....and their will ALWAYS be someone shorter and more fugly looking than you! It's all relative...I consider myself kinda 'fugly' by the way. Average looking. If only I was tall and blonde with blue eyes. :0 Oooh I always wanted to be barbie when I was a kid. Unfortunately...it never happened.

Everyone has a nasty and nice side....it just depends which side you care to feed.

[koolkat1980]

Ooops double post....! How about the blokes....do you also think there's "Handsome Guy Syndrome!??" Bawahahaah!

As for the Bitch who tries to get free drinks off blokes......I bet she's MISSING a father figure in her life! She'd do anything to get male attention! That Gold digger bitch! Slapper!

Even some pretty girls are missing something in their lives. She'd probably say to you: "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful! I never had a daddy!" :(

I used to have a frenemy like this....she would act sexy around guys and ask them to get her 'top of the range' drinks...poor kid! She was missing a father figure in her life, didn't have much to do with her mother. The guys getting her the drinks usually thought she was just an easy target anyway....for sex!

[and1grad]

Ooops double post....! How about the blokes....do you also think there's "Handsome Guy Syndrome!??" Bawahahaah!
I think we can say that there's a Pretty Boy Syndrome. Thankfully, I dont know any pretty dudes so I dont know that I'm willing to speak on it too much.

Maybe some of the ladies of the board can chime in on that.

[hoodie]

Yeah. I think some of the model-good-looking guys are also users. You know, the type to juggle as many women at a time as possible simply because they can. I've got a couple of friends who are, unfortunately, attracted to this personality type. It's unfortunate, too, because just like the Pretty Girl Syndrome, if no one let them get away with getting whatever they want, then they wouldn't attempt it!

[Mini14]

For example; say your a female and you were working in a sushi bar and a gorgeous girl comes to be served....then an above average guy comes to be served....I bet you'd serve the bloke first regardless of whether the "Pretty girl" was their first or not. After all, that pretty girl probably has an easy life, gets everything easy and is probably a skanky arse slut, hoe gold-digger. So, serve the bloke first and give her the dirty look whilst I'm at it. That Bitch! She's probably a man-eater slut anyhow. How dare she taller than me and blonde! That bitch!

I think this is meant as a joke(? -sorry if I missed the point) but that sounds like discrimination to me... making some pretty big assumptions about someone based purely on how they look, and then treating them unfairly because of it. Looks are just another outcome of the genetic lottery, it's pure luck. Maybe the girl in this situation is as you say, but it's just as possible that she's a really nice person too...

[Mini14]

I think it's all relative really! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! A girl you might consider "Pretty and Gorgeous"....is someone your mate might not find pretty at all! Same goes for the blokes. Some guys I find HOT, other girls cringe and think....gross! "How could you!?"


I think this is very true.. I have been discovering this more and more over the years too :) Attractiveness definitely comes in many forms and it's great to know that we're not all after the same people..lol

[Orca]

I think this is very true.. I have been discovering this more and more over the years too :) Attractiveness definitely comes in many forms and it's great to know that we're not all after the same people..lol

See I think the exact opposite is true. We as a society have extremely strict criteria as to what is considered attractive or not, and people who do not conform to those standards will never be accepted. Unless you are one of those excluded people, you will probably never notice. For example, I think I have only ever been served by a bar tender two or three times in my entire life. I am the ugly girl who is ignored. I could stand at the bar all day naked and no-one would notice. I have to ask a friend to get me a drink.

Looking back I think church lied to me. I went to a strict Catholic school and spent many hours listening to how it is the inner person that counts. Then when I was about 20 I suddenly realised that it didn't matter how nice I was, I would always be ugly and no-one would ever give me a chance. Of course Disney also lied, because I did not grow up to be a princess, and teen movies lied because I do not turn into a beauty queen if I take off my glasses LOL!

I'm sorry but I have no sympathy with the "poor little me, I am so beautiful, it's really hard" brigade. You have NO IDEA what it is like when everyone on planet Earth makes vicious bad assumptions about you, your character, your lifestyle, your intelligence, your earnings and every aspect of your life at a distance without even acknowledging you, never mind speaking to you. Cry me a river. Society labels me as worthless from a distance, and it is completely out of my control (actually maybe if I was a millionnaire and could afford lots of surgery, it wouldn't be out of my control. But currently it is).

[wordsmith]

I think it's less important if "society" deems my looks to be the utmost in desireable, as long as the person I love sees me that way. I could care less what society at large thinks of my appearance, so long as they appeal to me and to the person who loves me. Many of the people society at large (and, let's get real, mostly just the entertainment industry) upholds as examples of classic beauty are not people I find terribly attractive.