So...I don't think I can move to be with my bf anymore.

[GoogleGirl]

Gotta love teaching. I am pretty much eating very little, doing nothing, and working my ass off, but I STILL can't manage to save enough to support myself for any kind of move. I'm devastated. My bf really doesn't want to be in an LDR for another year, and I really can't be here where I am now for another year. I seriously think things will end for us. I'm so upset. I really calculated all this at the beginning, and I feel like somehow my job screwed me over. I feel shitty and want to punch a wall or something. ARRGHHH ON THE TEACHING PROFESSION.

[capella]

Awwww, ((((((hugs)))))). That stinks. If it makes you feel any better (and I'm sure it won't), but in Ohio the job market for teachers is extremely tight and you might have to resort to subbing. (Your BF is in Ohio right? If not then scratch that).

I don't really know what to say but just keep your chin up. The job will get better. I don't know about the BF situation, but I do know the job will ease up on you. If you left teaching what would you do?

[GoogleGirl]

yea well, i cant depend on subbing. i need stable income. ya know? Otherwise...I have no idea what I'm qualified to do. I mean..I have almosty 2 yrs experience working in an office. I've worked in retail. but other than that...I feel totaqlly worthless in the work world. And yes...it is Ohio where my bf is. I'm kinda at the point where I've pretty much given up already. ain't gonna happen.

[ebruening]

I can sympathize. Maybe this is the time of year where everybody feels a bit overwhelmed (standardized assessments, anyone?), but I can totally understand how this profession leaves you feeling drained at the end of each day. It's hard work, even on the good days. Have you talked about any of this with your boyfriend? Does he understand about your financial situation? (((hugs)))

[Skyblade]

Is there anyone who could help you out financially? I don't know much about your situation, but is there anyway he could move closer to you? Decisions between careers and relationships are tough.

[capella]

I would talk to the BF and see if you can't work something out. Is he in a position to move? Would he be willing? Is it a relationship healthy enough to discuss those possibilities (not saying it isn't... just an honest concern when you're talking about uprooting your life or his).

I know the situation with your mom is bothering you too right? I don't know what to say about that (can you find a roommate or something?). I don't know what the pay situation is in La., or the rent situation, but is that something that would be feasible at all?

I would suggest not giving up on teaching just yet as it's only your first year (or half-year ;)) It's something you need to give some time to. As always you can email or PM me if you need help.

((((((hugs))))))

[GoogleGirl]

no, I'm not giving up on teaching. but I may not be able to get a job where my bf is. in fact, I'm pretty sure I won't be able to. Amy, like you said, it's tough getting a job in Ohio. period. No one wants to move there so it's not exactly a great economic boom spot. And no, my bf can't move b/c he's in law school trying to get an internship. Trust me, he's not in the best situation to be supporting me while I try to get a decent job. I know he's not willing to give another year of LDr a shot so...maybe I should just cut my losses and move on. It's such a painful, heartbreaking situation. I am trying my best but it's not enough. Too many bills (my car insurance just went up) right now to allow me to save much money. *sigh*

[Krishna]

no, I'm not giving up on teaching. but I may not be able to get a job where my bf is. in fact, I'm pretty sure I won't be able to. Amy, like you said, it's tough getting a job in Ohio. period. No one wants to move there so it's not exactly a great economic boom spot. And no, my bf can't move b/c he's in law school trying to get an internship. Trust me, he's not in the best situation to be supporting me while I try to get a decent job. I know he's not willing to give another year of LDr a shot so...maybe I should just cut my losses and move on. It's such a painful, heartbreaking situation. I am trying my best but it's not enough. Too many bills (my car insurance just went up) right now to allow me to save much money. *sigh*

What are his reasons for not wanting to do another year of LDR? I mean, I know it sucks to be far apart (been there, done that, and will probably be doing it again shortly), but if he loves you...I guess I need to know why he's fighting it...

[GoogleGirl]

I think because it's just too hard for him. He's done it once (granted, this was back in his first year of college 7 yrs ago) and I guess it left a mark on him. I've done an LDR once for 3.5 years and am willing to continue to do so with him for the sake of saving money in order to move up there, but....takes 2 to tango..so..maybe it's just not meant to happen. :torn:

[Krishna]

Talk to him about your concerns and tell him that you dont want to give up on this relationship. Ask him whether he'd be willing to continue trying it. Tell him that you can re-evaluate every 1, 2, 3 months, whatever. PM me if you need to, like I said, I pulled a recent stint in a LDR.

[weary]

GG...i'm sorry this is looking like it might not work out.

i forget...would you be moving IN w/ your BF, or just there, but into a place of your own? if it is the latter i can see how that would be rather diff. but if you're moving in with him, how much $$ do you need to really move? i ask b/c i've moved clear across the country w/ as little as $1,000 and a kid to support, and managed to make it work. i sold a lot of my stuff rather than bringing it with me, including my car. i think the most expensive thing in our move was the plane tickets.

can you sell your things? how much $ are you anticipating needing, and how much of your stuff do you plan on taking with you? what exactly is your "office experience" in? even though you've got a target date, can you push it out just a few more months to save more $?

i know you (and others) have mentioned the relationship issue, and if that is really not going to work then all this is of course a moot point. but if you guys really want to be together, i think you can still find a way.

email or PM me if you want. {{{hugs}}}

[GoogleGirl]

Weary, I'd be moving into an apt with a roommate b/c my bf's roommate isn't planning on moving out for at least another year. I really don't have much stuff to bring. I have a bed and a computer table. I have tubaware drawers for shirts and stuff. I have the very bare essentials for the kitchen so I can't get rid of any of that. I really don't have anything to sell unfortunately. Just a sucky, sucky situation. I would need money for a deposit on an apt (always high), using a moving truck/car tow thing, and money to live off of until I could get a decent paying job. As for office experience, I worked in an office answering phone lines, copying, working with Microsoft word/excel/etc., setting up equipment for meetings, running errands in a state vehicle, dealing with lots of confidential records, etc. Not that that will help me get a decent job anywhere, but it's what I have experience in.

[weary]

GG -

those things can help you get a job and/or temp assignments...especially if you have, what was it?, 2 years?

you can sell your bed for a couple hundred $$'s (assuming it's in good condition and bigger than a twin) and buy an air mattress for like $50.

have you looked into moving in with someone who is seeking a roomate/renting a room out, rather than looking to get an apt of your own to start? that would make things much easier, i'd think, than having to have the $ for a deposit on your own.

i'll try to remember to email you over the weekend.