Getting people to do things besides EAT

[Legal(b)eagle]

I hate going out to dinner as an evening activity. Yet I am having the worst time getting my few acquaintences to do fun or interesting things-- all they want to do is sit around and EAT, which is expensive, fattening and boring as hell! Any suggestions on getting people to "buy in" to activities other than eating?

I just wanna go play!

[Krishna]

Organize the outing yourself. Also, know what your friends are into...whether they are athletic, or not, etc. Some ideas:

Mini Golf
Bowling
Volleyball
Movie


...Ok, maybe I'm just rattling off things I like to do, but still...

[steph78]

Screen on the Green this summer! It's free, they tend to play great movies, people who want food can bring it, or not, as they choose, and it's great fun hanging out in the park before it gets dark and they start the movie.

Also, everything Krishna said. Add to that:

- hiking as a weekend activity (Lake Allatoona north of town is only about a 1/2 hour drive and there are tons of trails that lead to secluded beaches around the lake - great for a picnic and a swim on a hot summer day)

- start a weekly poker (or other game) night with people taking turns hosting.

[shorty]

Could you look in the local newspaper to see if there are any cool events going on? I know my local newspaper has a special 'Arts and Entertainment' section every Friday. Maybe you could look in something like that to see what's going on.

I agree that eating out is way to expensive, fattening, and freaking boring. I have the same problem with trying to get out and do things. I've tried to come up with ideas of what to do... unfortunately, I rarely have anyone to go out and do them with.

Here are some ideas though:

Summer festivals/fairs (there's one almost every couple of weeks where I live)
Hiking
Swimming
Walking around the city
Window shopping
Playing pool/hanging out at a bar
Board games
Poker games
Watching movies
Going to the zoo/arboretum/aquarium/museum/etc (if you look hard enough, you can probably find times/places for free or reduced admission)
Live theater
Concerts
Comedy shows
Try a fitness class like dance or yoga or pilates or something (some places offer the first lesson or week of lessons free)

It really does kind of depend on the interests of the people you want to go out with. Sometimes people just aren't really motivated to go out and do things, especially if it's something new.

[winneythepooh7]

I agree that planning things yourself is the main way you are going to get out of doing the restaurant thing all the time. This is what I saw with my alumnae group I am part of. In the past, the "social chair" was frequently planning dinner outings at places that would cost everyone at least $50.00 a meal. I'm a social worker so that's a lot of money for dinner out. Not only that, but our group is also geared to new grads. I don't know a lot of new grads living in NYC who can afford that all the time. I also think it depends on the members of your circle. You may find you need to expand your social circle to find friends who are interested in the things you want to do. Try posting an ad on Craigslist!

[wordsmith]

Fairs and festivals. I live in the middle of nowhere, and there are STILL tons of fairs and festivals all summer long and into autumn.

Of course, people might actually want to eat at those, too.

[Kragthorpe]

I can't ever find more than one person who WILL do anything but sit and eat. You guys want to go to the lake this weekend??? (Silence). Or we can go to happy hour? (OKAY!!!!).

I think that sucks.

[wordsmith]

I tire of people who are stuck in the rut of any one type of activity. I know people you can't motivate to do anything unless it's the bar, unless it's poker games, unless it's a sporting event. Mix it up, for the love of God.

[meatwad]

Fairs and festivals. I live in the middle of nowhere, and there are STILL tons of fairs and festivals all summer long and into autumn.

Of course, people might actually want to eat at those, too.

Which is why those are both good ideas. Baby steps. Let them transition. :D

[meatwad]

I tire of people who are stuck in the rut of any one type of activity. I know people you can't motivate to do anything unless it's the bar, unless it's poker games, unless it's a sporting event. Mix it up, for the love of God.

LOL! You've just completely described my entire social life. :D

[WorkInProgress]

Meals are almost always a part of what I do socially. Sometimes, yeah, it's annoying, but I gotta eat anyway. But it's rarely the only thing I'm doing with whoever in the course of our visit.

I echo the others about planning something yourself (and/or finding some friends to DO stuff with).

[Kragthorpe]

One thing I hate even more is when you suggest taking a weekend trip or doing something significantly different and everyone gets all worked up to go and says they'll go and then you inevitably end up just going somewhere after work with a bunch of appetizers.

:mad:

[and1grad]

Meals are almost always a part of what I do socially. Sometimes, yeah, it's annoying, but I gotta eat anyway. But it's rarely the only thing I'm doing with whoever in the course of our visit.
Same here. Eating is usually the precursor to something else. I think I'd be bored too if all my friends and I ever did was eat and then go home.

[wordsmith]

LOL! You've just completely described my entire social life. :D

But you alternate between the three, right? You don't just do one activity and call that a social life...

[wordsmith]

Meals are almost always a part of what I do socially. Sometimes, yeah, it's annoying, but I gotta eat anyway. But it's rarely the only thing I'm doing with whoever in the course of our visit.

I echo the others about planning something yourself (and/or finding some friends to DO stuff with).

Yep, I sure don't have a problem with incorporating food into the outing, especially if it falls over a mealtime. I'm not gonna knock that. But I seldom get togther with people exclusively to eat. Maybe for birthday dinners, etc., but not as an ordinary social event. It's usually a precursor to whatever we're doing later in the evening.

[WorkInProgress]

Yeah. I mean, sometimes it's just dinner or lunch (but not often, because, yeah, that would get boring). But in those instances dinner/lunch takes hours and we talk. A lot. So it's not really wasted time.

[wordsmith]

Yeah, a lot of my social life consists of visiting/catching up...so a lot of times, that's easier to do in a more relaxing setting, cafe/restaurant/bar, than something where there is a lot of activity going on...it all depends on what your purpose for getting together is, because different venues lend themselves best to different purposes.

[meatwad]

But you alternate between the three, right? You don't just do one activity and call that a social life...

Well, yeah. :D

[embrassezla]

Gotta say, I never complain about getting together with people to eat.

It's a wonder I'm not obese.