text only relationship [Archive]

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Lucky13

11-04-2007, 01:53 AM

I met this guy online some about six months ago. In the beginning we instant messaged each other fairly often. Then we moved on to texting.Well it's six months later and we haven't even had a first phone call.We went on a date (i guess you could call it that) and he said at that time he's just not a phone person...what ever the hell that means. I'm sure most of you have heard of a book called "he's just not that into you"...well the title is kind of how I feel now. I mean if you were interested in someone...wouldn't you call them??? It's like we have an electronic "relationship". We've planned to get together three times since our dinner "date" and either he just doesn't contact me at all or he says "i'm working late".To me...thats saying "i'm not interested and i don't know any other way to show/tell you" but yet he still im's me and sends text messages. A part of me feels like I'm wasting my time with this guy. I'm not expecting a boyfriend out of this. I just want to know what the hell he wants from me. It appears I have two problems going with this guy. The fact that he won't call and that I don't understand his intentions. I can't wait until I can post a happy thread but for now I've got issues. Should I just stop talking to him??? Am i right in thinkin he really isn't interested??? Has this happened to anyone else...if so what did you do. To be honest I'm getting fed up with the lets make a plan and then he'll stand me up. What could he possibly be gaining from all of this.

capella

11-04-2007, 06:54 AM

He sounds socially stunted and immature. I would cut off all communications. Don't worry about his intentions because he may not be clear himself. Focus on YOUR intentions. He's not worth the time you're investing in worrying about all of this or agonizing in great detail over any connotations in the texts. Stop that! That's not healthy. I would just ignore him from now on or send him an email and tell him this is a juvenile situation and you refuse to communicate solely through electronic devices. The biggest thing is that YOU really don't have any problems with this guy. The problem is him, not you. Break it off and move on to someone who would value you.

CityGal

11-04-2007, 06:59 AM

Have you tried calling him? I once "dated" a guy who hated to call people. He would often text message everything. After a while it just got annoying bc you just miss phone calls....anywho....whatever happened with that happened or didn't. Def. don't stress over a guy. If they are interested, they will show it. You are so much better than this.

wordsmith

11-04-2007, 10:21 AM

I've done my share of online dating, and honestly, people who aren't interested in taking it out of electronic media for an extended period of time either aren't interested in you, or have something to hide.

If he won't take or make calls, there's more than a slight possibility he has a girlfriend. Or a wife.

winneythepooh7

11-04-2007, 10:30 AM

Vikarious

11-04-2007, 10:36 AM

You say you're not looking for a boyfriend out of it....what are you looking for then?

Of course its not worth your time to dick around with this guy - regardless of whether you're friends or dating, its rude to cancel plans.

Move on, sounds like he has social issues.

Deni81

11-04-2007, 06:26 PM

Something is shady about his text-only way of communicating. I agree with the others that he might have something to hide or isn't really into you. You deserve much better than this.

arrow

11-04-2007, 06:53 PM

If he won't take or make calls, there's more than a slight possibility he has a girlfriend. Or a wife.

My thoughts exactly.

sondra_finchley

11-05-2007, 08:57 PM

Whats the point? Just ignore him and hell go away eventually... or learn to press his finger against the little buttons and wait for you to answer.

Ohherr.... maybe hell be so confused by your "lack of response" hell actually call. What a riot that would be!