How well do you know yourself?

[gambit293]

Most QLCers are struggling to find themselves(there are currently about 20 other threads related somehow to this one), but it's just so difficult given all the conflicting scenarios:

-What you truly are (the holy grail!)
-What you currently perceive as yourself
-What you want to be
-What you feel you should be
-What your friends or family want you to be

And on top of that, who you are is constantly changing as well.

It's very frustrating; I've been pouring through so many "what do I want to do with my life?" books, but it's so hard to truly know what you are. Those self-evaluations can only tell you so much; every question you fill out is generally rationalized by one of the scenarios listed above. I feel like I am just treading water. Everything is starting to feel relative.

What do the rest of you do to "find" yourselves? Are we ever ready to truly decide, "Yes, that's who I am and that's what I want to do!"

[haley]

When we were younger, we could say what we wanted with a lot more clarity than we probably can now. I know of a few people who maintain that clarity even through adulthood, yet there's no one in the world without a little doubt in matters life, love, and work.

Guide your life with your principles, your deepest values. For me, it's peace and love. I make my choices and direct my conscience towards those principles. Those principles help me direct my life and not feel so lost.

[Layback]

I agree with Haley. I think that we need to start listening to our "gut" so to speak and stop listening to what we have been tought or told about life.

I realized something the other day when I was watching t.v. We are no longer people. We are consumers. We buy our romances (Eharmony.com), we buy our happiness (SSRI commercials), we by our looks (hair replacement, etc).

Happiness is accepting who you are and living in tune with that knowledge (i.e. not taking a job just because it's prestigious).

Fo me, it's having a close relationship with my family and sharing my life with my fiancee.

You are going to die someday. Spend your days being a first rate version of yourself rather than a second rate version of someone else. Learn from your mistakes and grow.

[coll214]

I don't think we ever really know ourselves since we are constantly changing... I'm sure very few of us are exactly the same as we were at 18-19. I know i'm not!

The trick is to IGNORE all the expectations, ideas that everyone else around you thinks that you should be like. If you feel like going out and changing something, wheter it's your appearance, job, location... YOU are the only person that can ultimately make you happy; at least that's what i've learned.

[snowbugs21]

There is so much pressure from the outside world, go to school, graduate, go to college, know what you want to do, graduate, get a great job, make lots of money, drive a nice car, marry a nice man or woman, live in a house with a white picket fence, have 3 kids, grow old together. This is when you want to say, hey, you did it your way, I'm going to do it my way, and maybe it will be different, and maybe I won't make the same shoices as you did, and maybe I'll get hurt, but I'll get there, and when I do, I'm going to be happy, cause I lived a little, I fell down, but I got back up and kept on going and in the process I found out who I am, and I'm a heck of a lot happier than you'll ever be........that's what I've always wanted to say to those people who thought they knew what was best for me, or thought they knew it all. Guess again.