relationships/marriage/etc

[MJB]

I've been dating my girlfriend for about 2.5 years, and we've been talking about marriage for the last 6 months or so.
Problem is she wants to go to grad school out of state, and I have a pretty good paying job here and don't necessarily want to move away for 4 years (she's looking for a PhD).

Any of the married folks ever have to compromise on a situation like this? I want her to follow her dreams, but I don't necessarily want to be pulled away for them.

[heatherf]

Hmmmm.....

My ex went away to school after we had been together for 5 years- he went to so cal and I'm up in norcal. I felt totally betrayed- it was bs. You don't get with someone for 5 years and then leave for school- talk about planning your life without me in it! And he could have gone to school up here- it was an option- he was accepted. But I am so happy he left!! He was a jerk and yada yada and I'm now married to my soul mate who.......

Was moving from where we met and worked to start law school. But we decided that we wanted to get married and be together - so I moved to be with him the first chance I had.

If it's really love- the two of you will plan your lives together. You don't just say I love you, but by the way I'm gonna move X miles from you and we'll just have a long distance relationship! That's total crap.

And planning your life with someone isn't difficult- you just do it because you have both of your interests in mind.

[kimmer23]

why cant she go to grad school in the state you live in now? things would be much easier. i am sure there are plenty of good schools in your state.