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QuarterLiferAmy
03-04-2009, 02:20 AM
I have a strong feeling that I maybe coming down with a bout of major depression.

-Since September 2008 I have held 4 jobs. Granted the first job was a contract position and was to a specific date anyways. I am still at job #2 (contract position but extended), quit boring retail job #3 and just started job #4 last week already have issues with it).

-As I mentioned in previous posts I have been trying to help my parents out of some material troubles. They are both seeking counselling and things are getting better...but, I am harbouring so much animosity, frustration, anger, resentment, hurt feelings. I was in tears when I told my parents today that everytime I come home from work, I worry that I will have to break-up a fight. Lucky nothing has resorted to violence, but the arguments can get really loud and really out of hand. My parents are naturally loud talkers. Often I wake up in the morning and hear muffles of loud talking; my stomach just churns (even if they are talking to each other pleasantly or talking to someone else over the phone)

-My Dad's company was sued by a customer and a former employee & her parents. I have spent much of the last year helping him sort through all the paper work, litigation, meetings, lawyer correspondence. Last week he lost his first case. I've been the dumps ever since. It's been so hard. I blame my Dad for his extramartial affair for his problems with his company. He has staff employed (which are basically very good, honest, hardworking people), but eventually even his secretary/accountant got sick of the cases and uploaded the files on me. I have been paid for the work (ok, i guess) because my Dad told me it's going to increase my taxes...


-I supposed to leave in April to Australia, but found out last month that my cousin lost her job. It was her idea to move out with me (to get away from parents) and share 1/2 the rent. Unfortunately that isn't going to happen anymore since she has no money/no job to cover rent. So now my trip is completely on hold. I have pushed the 'pause' button on my visa papers.

-I often stare out the bus window thinking about how it is humanly possible to have graduated only 10 months ago with a BA degree, having held four jobs since, and be making only $2 above minimum wage working with a bunch of people who have no post-secondary schooling doing the exact same job as me. It's so frustrating. My co-workers are great (oldest in the department is like 27), but amongst them I feel like I can do so much more as I have years of education to back my credentials. Most of my work day is spent on facebook, quarterlife forums, checking e-mail and playing card games on the net. I am so underwhelmed by the work I just don't know where to start. There is talks of cross-training me in all departments (which I believe is starting next week) and then potentially promoting me to supervisor - but who knows when that is all going to happen! Maybe it's just another broken promise.

-I thought about renewing my gym membership, but then decided not to so that I could come home and help my Mom with housework. So now, after work I just go home and sit on the computer again or watch TV. Sometimes help make dinner...or on the rare occassion go out for coffee with friends (all are too busy with school, SO, and work that they have no time). I feel like such a loser amongst my friends. All of them have SO, jobs, some of them are going to be moving out...and here I am, stuck making less than my best friend who has a med. tran. diploma...

It just brings me to tears when I think about my life and where it is going....

realfox
03-04-2009, 03:47 AM
It must be the weather in Western Canada--I feel the same pain!!!

Don't worry! It takes time after a degree to find your feet. I worked in a call center for months after I finished my first degree. It made me realize that with a simple undergrad (especially being from western Canada myself) that it just doesn't cut it anymore. Hang in there, something will happen!

As for the you dad and the litigation that he is facing. Litigation can be scary, especially if you're on the losing end! But hang in there justice always works itself out!

erika36
03-05-2009, 04:46 PM
It's the weather everywhere you guys! :p It's nice and sunny where I am right now, but I'm having a pretty rainy week. :cry: And the economy and job market is just baaaad everywhere.

sam handwich
03-05-2009, 06:40 PM
try some st. johns wort! I was skeptical when i first tried but it perked me right up!

yogaflame13
03-11-2009, 03:02 PM
To the OP:

It is nice of you to help your parents so much, but you really gotta put more time/effort into YOU. I don't know the entire background here obviously, but it sounds like you pretty much are putting all of their interests before yours. Like, get the freakin gym membership if you want it...housework can wait till you get home after working out for an hour, that shouldn't be a big deal. Plus the exercise will make you feel better.

I hear you about the "I have a BA but it doesn't seem to be doing me any good" thing. As I said in another thread, I don't think having a BA really does anything for you unless it is a very specific degree that can be applied to a very specific career.

But anyways, I know things are rocky at home, but out of all this, you need to start putting yourself first, at least in some ways, and taking some time to meditate about what YOU want to do with your life and what will make YOU happy.

Again, it's nice of you to help your parents, but they are grown people and can paddle their own boats, unless there are some unusual factors at play I am not aware of.

QuarterLiferAmy
03-11-2009, 10:42 PM
To the OP:

It is nice of you to help your parents so much, but you really gotta put more time/effort into YOU. I don't know the entire background here obviously, but it sounds like you pretty much are putting all of their interests before yours. Like, get the freakin gym membership if you want it...housework can wait till you get home after working out for an hour, that shouldn't be a big deal. Plus the exercise will make you feel better.

I hear you about the "I have a BA but it doesn't seem to be doing me any good" thing. As I said in another thread, I don't think having a BA really does anything for you unless it is a very specific degree that can be applied to a very specific career.

But anyways, I know things are rocky at home, but out of all this, you need to start putting yourself first, at least in some ways, and taking some time to meditate about what YOU want to do with your life and what will make YOU happy.

Again, it's nice of you to help your parents, but they are grown people and can paddle their own boats, unless there are some unusual factors at play I am not aware of.

Thanks for your reply. I am not sure if I understood your point about the B.A. exactly. Are you agreeing with me in saying that a BA is pretty much useless useless since it is not 'job specific'? Send me the link to your other posts regarding your thoughts on the BA degree. Maybe that will clarify the point a bit better (if I have indeed misunderstood it).

Agreed, I do have to take care of MYSELF first before I can take care of anyone else. This is something that I have been trying to work on. I often take on alot other peoples problems (namely friends and family). Often I feel like if I nothing to worry about then I am really 'occupying' myself...worry makes me feel like I have something to do. When I was a student I worried about students things - completing assignments, getting to school on time, picking/reg. classes etc along with organizing my time for volunteering/working. So I always had a constant worry or whirlwind of activity in my brain. Now that I am just working, it's like most of my worries are off my shoulder (other than worrying about why I am not as successful as my classmates for example..)...for now at least. Wait till I have a mortgage to worry about...huh.

yogaflame13
03-12-2009, 01:39 AM
Thanks for your reply. I am not sure if I understood your point about the B.A. exactly. Are you agreeing with me in saying that a BA is pretty much useless useless since it is not 'job specific'? Send me the link to your other posts regarding your thoughts on the BA degree. Maybe that will clarify the point a bit better (if I have indeed misunderstood it).

Agreed, I do have to take care of MYSELF first before I can take care of anyone else. This is something that I have been trying to work on. I often take on alot other peoples problems (namely friends and family). Often I feel like if I nothing to worry about then I am really 'occupying' myself...worry makes me feel like I have something to do. When I was a student I worried about students things - completing assignments, getting to school on time, picking/reg. classes etc along with organizing my time for volunteering/working. So I always had a constant worry or whirlwind of activity in my brain. Now that I am just working, it's like most of my worries are off my shoulder (other than worrying about why I am not as successful as my classmates for example..)...for now at least. Wait till I have a mortgage to worry about...huh.

Yeah, I agree with the BA = worthless unless job specific thing...thats what I was trying to say. :)

QuarterLiferAmy
03-12-2009, 01:52 AM
Yeah, I agree with the BA = worthless unless job specific thing...thats what I was trying to say. :)

Wait, you have a BA in History? I guess you have every right to say that a BA is worthless...:( I am sad about that too...

yogaflame13
03-12-2009, 02:07 AM
Wait, you have a BA in History? I guess you have every right to say that a BA is worthless...:( I am sad about that too...

Haha, yeah well it's my own damn fault for majoring in something that is totally worthless unless you want to be a History professor, high school teacher, or just continue being a student for an indefinite amount of time. It really has no definite uses beyond those things.

Hell, one of my professors used to say "Don't major in history, go into refrigerator repair!" I am inclined to believe him now, because refrigerator repair is a definite skill that is easy to find job openings for. I have never seen a "professional history major" job on craigslist. :P

Schecter_Guy
03-12-2009, 10:18 AM
Somebody once told me that for the most part a degree shows you have been challeneged mentally and are not mentally challenged. The fact is most people get jobs that have nothing to do with their major.

I have a degree in finance and I would not say my job has much to do with finance. Hell there are two girls that work with me where one has a degree in psychology and one has a degree in religious studies. Just gotta put yourself out there and someone will bite. Well if the economy did not suck so bad they would.