cute vs. sexy

[girlinterrupted]

Is it better to be cute or sexy? And if you're cute, is there any way you can be sexy or vice versa?

[Lynn0623]

I wish that I could be sexy instead of "cute." I hate being told that I am cute. Makes me think of a little kid. Meg Ryan is cute but she can also pull of sexy. Guys--how can a woman who is cute be more sexy?

[Layback]

Sexy is a term used to describe someone who you just want to jump. If you are cute, you caqn be sexy by the way you act or the clothes you wear. I don't mean that you should be a slut - that's not sexy. But show some cleavage and get a sexy haircut.

The two chicks on the Shear Blonde commerical - you know the ones that sing. They aren't pretty - they are cute - but they are sexy as all hell.

[coll214]

LOL. i was just thinking of this... Can cute = sexy? I've been called both, so who the hell knows! Is it in the eye of the beholder? I'll be curious to see what the guys have to say to this...

[Crimson King II]

I think cute can totally = sexy. It entirely depends on what mood I'm in, I think. But I love cute girls. And I love sexy girls. And I'm not sure there's any great distinction for me.

[gluegun]

My perception is that sexy has more of an edge than cute. Cute sounds like somebody's kid sister or the girl next door. Sexy is more the turn heads on the street type woman.

[Lynn0623]

well dammit I want to turn heads on the street corner but alas I know that I do not! I guess I will be stuck being cute forever. I want to look like the models in the VS catalog but that would mean giving up eating and I could never do that ;)

[gluegun]

It isn't hard to turn from cute to sexy. You don't have to starve yourself either. It is all about the attitude! Get a stylish haircut or go buy a sexy top (that normally you would never wear, but damn, you can't help but admit you look good in). The great thing about "sexy" is that it is totally broad. A million different looks could be perceived as sexy.

(as opposed to cute, which in my mind is a more traditional, conservative, run of the mill type look)

[girlinterrupted]

Hmmm, maybe you have a point, gluegun, but I think the reason I have always gotten "cute" and "pretty" is b/c:

1. I am short, so I don't have long legs or anything like that (which most guys seem to be into);
2. I have no breasts (which I know every guy is into), so that new sexy top just points to my lack in that area.

[tipsy88]

I agree with MetFanL, for me sexy is a lot more of your demeanour and the way you carry yourself. The more tantilating the woman the more "sexy" i find her to be. There is nothing wrong with cute, quite the opposite.

[and1grad]

I think anybody can be sexy because thats more about attitude (confidence). I think cute implies that you're easy on the eyes. IMO, more people can be sexy than can be cute.

Meg Ryan is sexy? Well...maybe "When Harry Met Sally" at that one part but....

[Layback]

She's sexy in City of Angels too. If a guy's first thought when he sees you, is "I'd do her" - chances are you are sexy. Sorry to be crude - it's just how it is.

[Lynn0623]

I think that I will just have to come and accept the fact that I am not "sexy" by societal standards. But in my BF's eyes...he tells me I am sexy all the time :D

[Lynn0623]

I also think it has to do with your confident attitude. Women who think they are sexy are the ones who are going to turn heards. When I get all dressed up to go out and put out this confidence, the kind that isn't fake confidence, I am sure I turn more heads then when I am in my Monday thru Friday 9-5 mode.

[gluegun]

You totally nailed it Metfan. The great thing about sexy is that it can be created. Cute/pretty, however, you pretty much have to be born with.

Screw societal standards. Sexy is a state of mind. And if you don't sincerely believe yourself to be sexy then nobody else will either.

(For example, I've obviously never seen Metfan, but I'm going to take here word for it that she probably is gorgeous. See what a bit of confidence can do!)

[dliepmanSUX]

alright...have to contribute...

I have a more varied rating scale...or rather characterization scale...

we'll get the obvious ones out of the way first...

HOT- a look/attitude that promotes lustful desires...I think a hot guy carries a slightly different connotation since women tend to think with the head that is on their shoulders more often than men do...a hot woman is one you might see in FHM or STUFF magazine...however, since it has to do with a demeanor, hot girls can often be a bit unappealing due to the fact that they know they're hot (if they dare to dress that way) and hence come across a bit too into themselves...

PRETTY- a simplified version of 'beautiful'...I think it also has a bit to do with attitude...a pretty girl to me is one who is both kind and soft on the eyes...sort of a classic feel

BEAUTIFUL- primarily relates to looks...classic beauty...to me is more in the face than the body...notice how there are 'pretty girls' but there are 'beautiful WOMEN'...deep eyes, smooth facial lines, flowing locks, bright infectious smile, emotion in the face...

SEXY- metamorphosable...that is, all types can become SEXY...HOT girl would need to de-slutify a bit...pretty girl could dress the part...Beautiful woman could just smile...it is an attitude as well...sort of a not-so-over-the-top confidence...willing to take charge of the moment but also susceptible to being willingly overpowered...the word 'prowling' comes to mind...

CUTE- probably my favorite type of them all...best mix of visuals and attitude...kinda pressure free...most versatile I guess...someone you could go snowboarding with, snarf down burritos with, and then go hit the hot tubs with...snuggly...nuzzle-able...someone to spoon with...sweatshirt and pig-tails...a bit bashful, a bit of a goof...playfully sexy...willing and able to be a dork, but also the type with classic sweetness...


where do you rate?????

[Lynn0623]

I am definately cute...like I said...always have and always will be. But I am fine with that actually...I wouldn't want to look like to women in FHM or Maxium....I think it would change who I am as a person.

[pisces2473]

By your standards, dliepmanSUX, I would say I'm cute. I'm totally the type of girl to do all those things with. But my BF thinks I'm sexy...I always thought I was just cute. Go figure :confused:

[TankgirlyC]

I think one aspect left out is that sexy can tend to carry some mysteriousness with it.

Cute girls typically have it all out on the table, but that doesnt mean they arent sexy. Maybe its how their sweatshirt exposes one of their shoulders as their pig tail dusts it.....this is sexy, but also leaves parts to the imagination and thus creates the sexiness....the mystery.

In response to the girl who said she cant wear a sexy low cut top because of no breasts......did you know that all those oscar gowns that are cut so low are MADE for small breasted women? Too much cleavage is gross! Listen to the fashion critics!

I think sexy is being more covered up to leave things to the imagination.
Ive been told Im sexy, pretty, hot whatever. I dont wear it like a badge of honor. Ill smile and say thanks but in my head I just think but its just me, the same me I have always been and I dont see those things, but if they do more power to them.

[Densel]

I think I fall in the SEXY side. I have had guys tell me I'm sexy. I've always thought that was flattering until I got an email from my former roommate a few weeks back (see below) and now when a guy says I'm sexy, I feel like a piece of meat or that he just want to sleep with me and I find that very insulting.

"I have to admit that there were a lot of nights I wanted your door to be open so maybe we could just not think and take care of each others needs like two adults. I am a sexual person right now at 29. I like to talk about feelings and life, but right now I am into the basics of two people being close and that is mostly physical. I often thought about what it would be like to be with you in a physical way and I think that is what caused some tension. I knew I had to forget about that and well maybe that was part of our problem. You are sexy and really have a sex type appeal to you. I knew I wasnt the relationship type of guy with you, but Iknow that I wanted to definitely have a nice night with you."

Yes, I have naturally big boobs (34DD) and I don't let it all hang out but at the same time, I can't wear turtlenecks and tape down my boobs 24/7. I can't hide it or disguise them. They are there and it's hard to miss.

[Crimson King II]

Attitude completely plays a huge role in any measure of these. Anna Kournikova can fit into any of dilepman's categories depending on what she wears or how she acts. You could also give her glasses and humility and she may be cute, but not so much sexy. Moreover, it's entirely subjective from the perspective of who's judging. For instance...Angelina Jolie...does NOTHING for me. I wouldn't place her in any of those categories. But, clearly, many (most?) men think otherwise--and toss her immediately into the HOT category.


My gf is adorable-cute. She's all of the descriptions you typically find for cute. That said, she's classically pretty, and I think very sexy. Depending on what mood she's in, or how her confidence level is that day, or what she elects to wear...she runs the gamut from HOT to Cute.


I just don't think it's an either-or, 1 vs. 2 proposition.

[Skyblade]

I would say that I fall into the cute category based on several factors. One, I look and sound like I'm 12 years old. Well, maybe not that young, but still. I love to make people laugh and just act dorky and make impressions of people.
I've always been told that I'm "cute" and maybe a couple times that I was "sexy," but mostly I'm just "cute" and "sweet." Whatever that means :).

[coll214]

I've heard'em all, but judging by your description, i'd say most days i fall into the 'cute' category... although some days you just want to put that mini-skirt and the heels on and be the sexy one for a bit... ;)

[shimmer728]

Cute. Definitely cute.

I've been called "beautiful" a few times (which I think is a big exaggeration :D ) and sexy/hot by guys who are just trying to get in my pants.

[cazort]

I totally cannot stand girls who are "sexy". If a girl or guy thinks that a girl is sexy, there's about a 90% chance that I'll find her totally unattractive.

I'm almost EXCLUSIVELY attracted to "cute" girls.

To me...I am attracted to girls who are wholesome and natural looking. And that's cute, not sexy.

When I think of sexy I think of women who have a "stereotypical" attractive body type, I think of women who wear clothing that is trying to reveal a lot of skin or look slutty. I think of people wearing things like high heels. Women wearing too much makeup. All things that a lot of men seem to find attractive but I find repulsive.

On the other hand, if someone is "cute" I think of a girl who is friendly and smiles a lot, who isn't wearing any makeup, who just looks wholesome and good. And that's the kind of person I am TOTALLY attracted to.

So I think you have the whole thing in reverse--it begs the question, what kind of guys are you trying to attract? If sleazebags is what you want--then sexy is the way to go. But if you want a real man who will respect you as a human being and not treat you as a sex object, then you want to go for the "cute" thing.

I dunno...maybe I'm weird, but just my piece of advice.

[zoomenow]

Most woman say that I am cute and I happy about it.:cool:

[Densel]

Cazort,

I agree with MetFanL. You seem to have a picture in mind when you think of someone sexy. Perhaps, you have a Playboy centerfold in mind. Sexy doesn't equal slutty. There is a big difference between sexy and slutty.

I find it very offensive when QLC members use boards to pass judgments and insults on each other. It's really not necessary. It's one thing to voice your opinion and it's another to voice your opinion in a degrading and disrespectful manner.

Have in mind, there are some QLC members who may see themselves as sexy and see nothing wrong with that. So when you say all sexy people are slutty or that sexy people reveal a lot of skin, that's a very premature conclusion as you don't know EVERY sexy person in the whole world.

[dliepmanSUX]

I don't think Cazort was trying to offend anyone...most of what was stated was preempted with "I think"...it appears to me that cazort was simply trying to challenge common stereotypes as cazort perceives them to be...just remember that if you consider yourself 'sexy' that cazort will likely not be interested in you romantically...simple as that...but I'll likely be!!!:p Shoot, I'd be interested if you're willing to talk to me!!!:cool:

[kitalyn414]

i don't think we could ever boil this down to one type of girl being sexy and another being cute. it is all personal preference.

i have had some men tell me that i'm sexy and others tell me that my vibe is asexual. they can't both be right! it depends on what the person is looking for.

[TankgirlyC]

Its all in the eye of what YOU personally find sexy vs cute. Some people find certain traits "cute" while others find that SAME trait to be sexy.

This all has to do with what we personally are attracted to.

Oh and as for being repulsed by Christina or Angelina.....sorry but yeah they repulse me. :lol:
I just have low respect for what they do and thus I usually make fake gag noises when they appear on anything. >=)

[pisces2473]

While I don't like either of them...I do respect them. At least Christina comes right out and says she's what she is. She's not like Britney who's "I'm a virgin...oh wait, I'm not...I don't smoke...but I do." You have to respect Christina's honesty, even if it is in your face. As for Angelina, I think she's grown up a lot over the past few years and is trying to do some good in this world.

[Lynn0623]

It's funny but I think that alot of times women see other women like Christina, Brittney, and Angelina and are like, "they are such sluts and how can they disrespect themselves like that." When actually...these women wish they could be like Christina et al. It's all a jealously thing. Seriously, if I looked like Christina...I would flaunt it too!

[dliepmanSUX]

how can you like/dislike someone you don't know??? aren't we all a bit nieve to pass judgment on how we perceive them to be through the cultural filter we call the media??? I can comment on people's music and the behavior's that are exhibited by these particular performer's but I certainly cannot judge whether I 'like' them or not...except Britney...I really HATE her:twisted:

hehehe:D

[Lynn0623]

Exactly my point. Women will say that they "hate" Christina and Brittney but why do they really hate them? I think it's because they wish they could do the things the Christina's are doing.

[TankgirlyC]

No they both disgust me because of things they do....ok ok through a media filter (Ill give you that)

CHristina is a source for tweens to gain ideas about being a woman. Christina blurting songs like Drrty and dressing as she does sends a crappy message....as does Britany (but yes she says she is a V and isnt and doesnt smoke and does)

As for Angelina...having a vile of Billy Bob's blood that she drinks (and admitted that she did this) is gross. Its weird. She is another one who thinks she is wonderful and people should like her, but really I dont see anything she has done that has contributed to society as a whole.

I just dont like the message it sends to youth who have a hard time distinguishing between a good or bad role model.
I have no desire to walk around in what Christina wears or talk as lame as she does. I hold myself to a higher accord, so please dont think Im jealous of what she does......

[and1grad]

I thought I was following along with this thread until all this Aguilera and Jolie hate showed up. Do you really want to blame Aguilera for kids emulating her? Someone remind me what parents are for again. I grew up listening to NWA and Ice T among other rappers and I havent joined a gang or shot a cop yet. People acting and dressing the way they do have been around for forever and will be around for even longer. When they drop out of the spotlight, someone will take their place.

The Angelina Jolie hate is really surprising tho. I guess her being and having weird habits overshadows her golden globe and oscar wins. Not to mention being appointed goodwill ambassador a couple years ago for all her work in Cambodia. Apparently some people do see her value.

[TankgirlyC]

While I agree that parents need to step in and help guide their children-----this seems to be happening less and less.

Now before I go off on a whole entire thread on that (dont worry I wont!)----
I dont think back in the day when Kris Kros came out and people wore baggy clothes backwards we were harming anyone.

BUT I tend to draw the line when a 12 or even 10 year old is dressing in belly tops, short shorts, wearing make-up.

Now the parents can step in but the child could get the make-up from a friend, or pack the short clothes in her bag and change when she gets to her destination.

Why do I point this out? Its what I witnessed in a 3rd grade classroom as well as at summer camp for a number of years. Just call it a small study of my own.
Kids from many different places around the country coming to one single camp-----and the ones who wanted to fit in or be cool tended to emulate these pop stars.

And yes kids shouldnt be looking to pop stars as role models..but they look to who is in the public eye and who they like...they like Britany....then they dress like her....

[pisces2473]

Yeah I agree MetFan...unless these kids are stealing their parents' money and sneaking out to the mall to buy the clothes...how are they getting them?

When I was a kid, there wasn't much that my mom would say no to (clothes-wise)...now it seems as if there are so many "no" clothes. Why are designers doing this!?!?!? Whatever happened to cute little kids clothes!?!?!? I better learn how to sew better because it looks like I might be making my kids appropriate clothes!

[TankgirlyC]

These 3rd graders would wear "normal" clothes to school then hike up the skirt, or tie the shirt so it was above where it would normally hang if it was not tied.

They would bring in lip gloss they stole from an older sister....

Its not like the parents were purchasing this stuff already "Britany like"

[pisces2473]

I think schools need to have (and if they already do, reinforce them) dress codes. My mom is an elementary school nurse (K-4) and she's always telling the boys to pull their pants up--"no one wants to see your boxers" and having the girls cover themselves up if they aren't dressed appropriately (she had parents donate extra sweats and stuff). One time this girl was wearing a tank top that was so loose, you could see down it. She was only in 2nd grade, but still, that's NOT appropriate for school. My mom ended up pinning it so it was tighter. Where are the parents? I remember my aunt giving me eyeshadow for dress up and I tried to sneak out with it on one morning and my mom made me go wash my face.

Some schools have dress codes, but don't enforce them. And girls still wear short short skirts and shorts, tight pants, tight shirts...looking like their going to the club instead of class. I'm not saying you can't look stylish or cool...but not skanky. And the guys!? Pull up your pants, get a shirt that's not 3 sizes too big...or stay away from the muscle shirt look...good lord!

[TankgirlyC]

I agree!!!

Also did anyone notice (I graduated 2002) that the Freshman class started dressing like they were going to a club rather than going to class?

When I started college it was common to go in your PJ pants and a T shirt or sweatshirt for an early morning class....jeans and a nice sweater if you had the time to get dressed.

These girls were going in SKIN tight pants tiny tube tops....I thought it was class not a meat market.

[pisces2473]

Oh yes. I remember being in college freshman year and amazed at the upperclassmen so dressed down. I was like, Hooray! No need to dress up. By the time I was a junior/senior, the younger kids were all glammed up for class. I thought to myself, Who are these kids and why are they in club wear?

*shakes head*

[pisces2473]

Oh yes, if you want to show yourself off, go ahead! But not in a classroom...and seriously, if you look that good in an 830 class, you are screwed up! LOL I went to a Catholic college where some classes were taught by priests...I don't consider myself a prude, but there were certain things I'd feel weird about wearing if I had a prof-priest. :razz:

[Crimson King II]

And that illustrates the whole point of this thread. In college a lot of girls showed up to early classes in their pajamas. And often, I found them just as hot as the skanked-up crowd. A PERFECT example of when cute=sexy. There was this one girl in my meteorology class who ALWAYS wore pajamas and all I could think about was....well, nevermind. But you get the point.

[pisces2473]

Awww look...we've come full circle :p

[TankgirlyC]

Fine if they want to be glammed up, but is it appropriate for a learning environment? Not really.

Just like at work....would you wear club stuff to work? No...I always wondered why these girls thought that was acceptable for a classroom and what would happen when they got into the real world.

[Lynn0623]

I can remember sitting in the dining hall during my Jr. year of college and watching all the freshman decked out like they were going out clubbing. My friends and I would comment on how they thought they looked so hot dressing like they did. What's even funnier is when these same girls started drinking, gained weight, and still tried to wear the same clothing.....:)

[pisces2473]

THAT is the funniest part--trying to fit into those skimpy clothes with the freshman fifteen!

[kimmer23]

i actually thought the pj's looked as bad as the club clothes. most of the students just woke up and came to class in the same thing they slept in. yuck! stinky! i am a morning person, so i always got up and showered and wore regular clothes. sometimes i had to go to work after class, so it was business clothes. my mom works in a middle school and some kids try to come to school in their pj's as well. their parents have to come and bring them clothes.

[TankgirlyC]

I think in middle school you should be dressed.

I saw nothing wrong with PJs as long as they were worn like regular clothes (PJ pants can double as sweat pants or track pants in my eyes)----

But if you had to work after school of course it would be easier to get up shower, dress go to class then go to work.

I used to have a 730am class that ended at 9 and then nothing until 10am. I would go back to the dorm and shower at 9 since most people had then left for class. Better than waiting in line IN a towel waiting for a free shower....I hate being rushed when getting ready, and other people being all crazed around me.

Just tried to not be around with the crowds.

[pisces2473]

I would wear PJ-like outfits to class, but never the same things I slept in.

Like Tank, I did the go to first class before showering thing. It worked out great. Of course, I still did my hair and washed my face/brushed my teeth before going to that first class.

[TankgirlyC]

I still put on some make-up. Just didnt want to shower....even if I had the night before...

And mostly I wore PJ pants that I would also wear if I was going to take a walk around campus....not the same thing I just caught ZZZZZs in.

[dliepmanSUX]

first comment:

speaking on behalf of a male who used to roll out of bed (usually late) for his AM classes, I generally had too much crust in my eyes to notice what people were wearing...who would want to be dolled up for an early morning Organic Chem lecture anyhow...who are you gonna impress, the shemale chem nerd girls or the pyromaniac lab geeks who were too cool for school anyhow because they could decipher an aldehyde from a ketone by wafting during lab??? all I was ever privy to was how people smelled...

second comment:

going to class in your PJs can get a bit scandalous when your PJs double as your b-day suit...:p


regardless, I am a sexy beast, and therefore even when I showed up for class naked without any deodorant and a face full of crust all of the chem girls (and guys of course) wanted me or wanted to be like me...because to them I was like the Brittany Spears of Chem 211... :cool:

[and1grad]

LOL @ WB

[daphne]

Just like at work....would you wear club stuff to work? No...I always wondered why these girls thought that was acceptable for a classroom and what would happen when they got into the real world.


We have a woman at my job, she has to be in her thirties, so I guess her clothing isn't Britney/ X-tina inspired, but she dresses like she's going to the club every day.
And I work in a corprate business-casual environment so it's not like it's a record company or someplace where you'd be expected to look trendy. She wore a tube top, short skirt and platform heels in the summer. To WORK people. She has a great body so I guess she works out or whatever but it's a bit much.
Then there's another woman in the tight stretch pants every day but that's another story.

[kimmer23]

i worked in a jewelry store for 7 yrs (through high school and college) and for awhile we were all blonde and we could pretty much wear anything except jeans. well donna (she was the oldest blond--about 35 at the time) she actually dressed the craziest. we loved her to death, but i think she had a strange upbringing and wore some pretty crazy outfits. she had fake boobs too and always wore low cut tops. i guess she got more sales that way! haha! now that i look back i cant believe some of the things we would wear.