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View Full Version : bulimic girlfreind PLEASE HELP



papertigers28
04-12-2004, 08:11 PM
so i have been dating this girl for over a year and i am really close with her family. Over the past couple of months she had been gradually losing weight, and she finally admitted to me about a month ago she was addicted to laxitives. I told her if she didnt quit, or if i caught her doing it again, i would tell her parents. Well sure enough she told me last week that she cant help herself. I threatened to tell her parents, and when that happened, she claimed it was a exaggeration and she never tried to quit, and to just give her a chance to quit before i tell her parents. She told me if she couldnt quit she would tell me then i could tell her parents. Thing is, what if she continues and doesnt tell me. I know she has a problem, but im wondering whether i should give her another chance, or go ahead and tell... please help

Phoenix
04-12-2004, 08:24 PM
Go ahead and tell. You don't know if she'll tell you and you don't want her to get worse when you could try to help her earlier on.

Don't necessarily go behind her back, though. Be supportive of her and give her the opportunity to tell her parents herself with you there, if she wants. But if she refuses to tell her parents and keeps pushing you off and saying to give her a chance, she'll tell you, etc... then you need to step in. The fact that she has a problem she can't control suggests she DOES need help and both of you shouldn't hesitate to help her get it.

papertigers28
04-12-2004, 10:52 PM
if i tell, she'll "never talk to me again"

papertigers28
04-12-2004, 10:56 PM
i already asked her to tell her parents before she left to go back to college, but thats when she spilled the whole "im gunna try to quit, ive never actually tried, i swear i will try" bit. So are you saying give her a chance?

Phoenix
04-12-2004, 11:04 PM
I'm saying give her a chance to tell her parents with you there. Not give her a chance to stop on her own. Because she won't. She already knows she has a problem she can't control.

If she never talks to you again, and she gets help for her problem, personally, I think it's worth it. It will hurt you, for sure, but the important thing is that she gets help. I think her statement is just a deterrent to keep you from getting her the help she needs. Maybe you just need to tell her that you'll go with her to tell her parents (to give her that chance) or you will inform them on your own. Something needs to be done.

Lipgloss Boost
04-13-2004, 01:52 AM
Babe: Come to my Forum! It's in my sig'. There are 2 subForums that may be able to help you. There's "Eating Disorders" or "Friends & Families"! I can direct you over to a few posters I know who can help. You take care.