Unregistered
06-19-2002, 10:41 PM
Hi People!!! I'm new to this thing. Here is my problem though.
Ok, I met this guy (going on 4 months). We went out on a couple of dates and we got along SO well. He just broke up with his ex like just months before he met me, but we continued to date. We talked about it and decided that we were not going to date anyone else. Which is cool. He is a really nice guy (or so he seems). A couple of weeks after we started dating he started making excuses and blowing me off alot. I did start getting ticked, but did not show him this because it was still new. His friends would always come before us. He was leaving to go for training for a new job for two weeks and he said when he got back things would change. He just needed time because of everything going on in his life. He came back and things seemed better. Then he started again. Not returning phone calls, not making phone calls, blowing me off, etc. I liked him, so I always gave him a chance. I didn't want to ask him, but I did a couple of times, asking him if he wanted to continue to see me and if he was seeing anyone else, cause if he was I was out of there. I didnt' want to be wasting my time. Well, a couple of weeks ago I got the 2am phone call. You know the ones I'm talking about - where the person has liquid courage in them and tells you things? Well, he told me that he was seeing someone else for about 3 weeks, but told her it was over because he realized that he wants to be with only me and he wants me in his life. I want to believe him so much. I asked him why he did it and he had no answer. He said he saw her less than me. I am not the type of person to crowd someone. If you need space, I give you space. I understand when you are busy, etc. I do expect honesty, especially when I'm asking you what's going on. He told me he wasn't totally honest with me because he didn't want to lose me. He went away again for work for a couple of weeks, and during those weeks he called, etc. I did alot of thinking, and I forgave him even though I told him the trust issue is going to be hard and he needs to prove it to me. Anyway, I picked him up from the airport. He told me the flight attendant was buying him drinks. Whatever. I was in his car and what did I find? Her number. I was so pissed that I threw it out the window. We had a nice weekend regardless of that. Saturday night his phone rang though, and when he came back in the room, I asked who it was and he said it was her. I got very upset and for the first time ever let him see me upset. I am not a very jealous person. I was mad at myself because I forgave him and he did the same thing again. Well, almost. He said he sees it a totally different way. He said he sees it as making a new friend and that he was honest with me that it was her that called. I don't see it that way at all. I want to make him understand, but I don't want to push him away. I gave him space to sort stuff out, not to date and call other girls, especially after he says he only wants to be with me. I dont' know what to believe anymore. I want to believe him so bad, and some of the things that he says to me and some of the actions make me want to believe him, but there is this doubt that he can't stand. I like him alot. I haven't met someone I liked in such a long time. I have dated, and none of them have been successful, and I really didn't care when it was over. With him, it's different. He says he wants to be with me and I hope he means it. I told him that I ususally do not get so jealous about things and he told me it is only natural. I thought about it and it is. I just want him to be honest with me because I am with him. He asks me things and I am always honest. I hope he understands that what he is doing is wrong and it upsets me. Why do men have to play such games? I know women play games too though. If he doesn't want to be with me, then why is he keeping me around? I straight out ask him if he still wants to be with me instead of wasting all of my time. He always tells me yes. He has even talked about marriage, which I told him not to even bring up because it's too early to even be thinking about that. I am so confused and i don't know what to do anymore.
Ok, I met this guy (going on 4 months). We went out on a couple of dates and we got along SO well. He just broke up with his ex like just months before he met me, but we continued to date. We talked about it and decided that we were not going to date anyone else. Which is cool. He is a really nice guy (or so he seems). A couple of weeks after we started dating he started making excuses and blowing me off alot. I did start getting ticked, but did not show him this because it was still new. His friends would always come before us. He was leaving to go for training for a new job for two weeks and he said when he got back things would change. He just needed time because of everything going on in his life. He came back and things seemed better. Then he started again. Not returning phone calls, not making phone calls, blowing me off, etc. I liked him, so I always gave him a chance. I didn't want to ask him, but I did a couple of times, asking him if he wanted to continue to see me and if he was seeing anyone else, cause if he was I was out of there. I didnt' want to be wasting my time. Well, a couple of weeks ago I got the 2am phone call. You know the ones I'm talking about - where the person has liquid courage in them and tells you things? Well, he told me that he was seeing someone else for about 3 weeks, but told her it was over because he realized that he wants to be with only me and he wants me in his life. I want to believe him so much. I asked him why he did it and he had no answer. He said he saw her less than me. I am not the type of person to crowd someone. If you need space, I give you space. I understand when you are busy, etc. I do expect honesty, especially when I'm asking you what's going on. He told me he wasn't totally honest with me because he didn't want to lose me. He went away again for work for a couple of weeks, and during those weeks he called, etc. I did alot of thinking, and I forgave him even though I told him the trust issue is going to be hard and he needs to prove it to me. Anyway, I picked him up from the airport. He told me the flight attendant was buying him drinks. Whatever. I was in his car and what did I find? Her number. I was so pissed that I threw it out the window. We had a nice weekend regardless of that. Saturday night his phone rang though, and when he came back in the room, I asked who it was and he said it was her. I got very upset and for the first time ever let him see me upset. I am not a very jealous person. I was mad at myself because I forgave him and he did the same thing again. Well, almost. He said he sees it a totally different way. He said he sees it as making a new friend and that he was honest with me that it was her that called. I don't see it that way at all. I want to make him understand, but I don't want to push him away. I gave him space to sort stuff out, not to date and call other girls, especially after he says he only wants to be with me. I dont' know what to believe anymore. I want to believe him so bad, and some of the things that he says to me and some of the actions make me want to believe him, but there is this doubt that he can't stand. I like him alot. I haven't met someone I liked in such a long time. I have dated, and none of them have been successful, and I really didn't care when it was over. With him, it's different. He says he wants to be with me and I hope he means it. I told him that I ususally do not get so jealous about things and he told me it is only natural. I thought about it and it is. I just want him to be honest with me because I am with him. He asks me things and I am always honest. I hope he understands that what he is doing is wrong and it upsets me. Why do men have to play such games? I know women play games too though. If he doesn't want to be with me, then why is he keeping me around? I straight out ask him if he still wants to be with me instead of wasting all of my time. He always tells me yes. He has even talked about marriage, which I told him not to even bring up because it's too early to even be thinking about that. I am so confused and i don't know what to do anymore.