are your parents still married?

[kitalyn414]

i thought of posting this poll on my way to work this morning. i'm betting there are lots of us whose parents are divorced, but when i started to think about my friends in general, all but one of them have parents that are still married. anyway, i thought it would be interesting to see how the poll plays out, what with the 50% (or more?) divorce rate.

[pisces2473]

Still married--28 years next May.

[sunshine79]

They had their 30 yr anniversary this week.

[tartytwenty]

Mine were together 24 years, and the divorce probably will come to the end next month or so. Just in time for the holidays :neutral:

Actually, I'm happy for them. They weren't compatiable anymore and still remain good friends. I know this is odd, but I kinda look forward to them dating and see who they pick.

[WeirdBrake]

Separated since '94, divorced since '02. Neither have re-married, even though my mother currently has an SO.

[kitalyn414]

wow. my parents divorced in '90, i think. they were married 15 years!!! dad's remarried currently & i have 2 half brothers & 2 adopted "half" sisters. my mom was remarried for 11 months in 1995 during which i had a step-sister & step-brother, now she's just dating someone. i also have a full brother.

[kitalyn414]

for the kids of divorced parents, do you think it is easier if the separation comes when you are younger (like elementary-school age) or when you are older (teens/20s)?

[bigboom]

my parents have been married 27 years and still going strong...

thank god for mom and dad for sticking together cuz we dont know how

[MetFanL]

My parents are stil married and v. much in love... a little over 28 years. :)

[shimmer728]

Mine celebrated their 29th anniversary in August. They annoy each other to tears, but I guess they still love each other underneath it all. :rolleyes:

[cheshrcarol]

Mine have been married for 30 Years as of last April.

[kitalyn414]

i'm beginning to feel like such a reject, being from a broken home and all! :cry:

j/k :D

[kimmer23]

mine have been married 31 yrs. they look more alike everyday, except my mom has longer hair and highlights. hehe!

[megrocks]

Mine had their 30th anniversary this summer. And every year I'm amazed that they make it through because they fight all the time.

[gluegun]

Mine have been married for 35 years.

[midtwenty]

My mother and father were married over 20 years before getting divorced. My mom and step-dad have been married 18 years. My husband's parents have been married over 30 years. My grandparents were married 64 years. In fact, most people in my family have stayed married for most of their lives.
for the kids of divorced parents, do you think it is easier if the separation comes when you are younger (like elementary-school age) or when you are older (teens/20s)?
Speaking from experience, I was about 6 when my parents divorced, and my bother was 15. He had a MUCH harder time with it than I did. The emotional trauma was harder, and he was more aware of what was happening than I was. Frankly, getting divorced was the best thing they ever did for me.

[kitalyn414]

i agree mid. my brother and i (10 and 7) had NO CLUE what was going on. i think it is better that way. had i been older & understood what was happening, i would have definitely been completely traumatized. it was difficult enough finding out what went down once i was old enough. i can't imagine if i had known at the time.

[coll214]

Another 'child of divorce' here... Mine were married for about 15 years before they divorced, when i was 11. Both now have the same S.O.'s from when they first divorced, going on 14 years... Dad lives w/ his g/f and i have no step-siblings and one sis.... For me, i was relieved they finally ended it. the are definitely not a compatible couple in the slightest...

[LakeJay]

32 years this past July and counting...They're attached at the hip.

[tina1979]

My parents have been married 26 years this year. They split up for a month or so once, but got back together and have been a lot better together ever since

[Skyblade]

My parents got divorced right after I finished 1st grade. I think overall it has a profound affect on my life. But it has to do w/ a multiplicity of things...feeling abandoned by my father, my father being an abusive alcoholic back then, etc.

[sunshinecat]

My parents just had their 34th anniversary last month. I can't imagine them ever getting separated because they are such a unit - I'm not sure how to explain it.

My grandparents were married almost 60 years until my grandmother passed away a few years ago.

So I have some good examples in my family of long marriages.

My husband's parents are divorced, however.

It's interesting to me that the couples who have stayed together seem to show each other more consideration, more patience. My parents still hold hands when they take walks, and I think those little things can make a huge difference.

~ sunshinecat ~

[season]

my parents have been married since like.. 1973 or something like that. they're great and i love them!

okay that sounded really cheesy but i really do think they are great and i do love them.

[SmilesSoSweet]

My parents have been married for just a little over 30 years. Sometimes we (the kids) wonder why they're still married, but in all they do belong with each other and the one can't survive without the other. My dad's parents were almost married for 50 years before my grandmother died, and most of my aunts and uncles are still married. Not many divorces in my family. Hopefully that won't be an issue for this generation.

[wordsmith]

My parents have been married for 32 years, and though they fought a TON when I was a child (lots of tension related to money issues), it was always apparent to me that they loved one another very much regardless. I never worried as a kid that they would split up.

However, as an adult, I look at them now, and they seem less happy than I always took them for. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't be better if they weren't together. They don't fight as much, probably (but I'm not living with them, so they might, for all I know), but my mom seems really unhappy with the way my dad has kind of retreated into basically being a loner. I feel sad for her, because I know she feels very taken for granted and ignored. I love my dad and I feel disloyal, but I sometimes wish my mom was on her own so she could be with somebody who treats her more like a partner, and less just as that person who's always around who you don't have to pay very much attention to.

I feel very odd that any part of my even remotely roots for my parents splitting up. And I don't really root for it, so much as I wouldn't be shocked or upset if my mom left. When I look at it objectively, I wish my mom was with somebody who noticed her - note, my dad is not mean or abusive to, or neglectful of my mom, it's just that he acts like a bachelor...he does his own thing, and is kind of absentmindedly affectionate toward her, but doesn't really put much consideration into being married to her anymore. I think he's gotten too comfortable. I know she's lonely. And she's told him, and he says he'll change, but doesn't. I don't think it would be a bad thing for my dad if she left, he seems to want to be just kind of on his own, anyway. I just feel like everybody deserves happiness.

Well. More than you needed to know. But I just wondered if anyone else is to the point where they could be supportive of a split, when mostly as kids, we all feared that more than anything?

[silverkitten62]

My parents have been married for over 35 years. They have gone through rough times together but the love they share is a huge example to me, what marriage takes and what it is about... so much more than just love.

They are so cute together now. They just started going dancing together and went to a football game together today.

My grandparents were together since they were teens up until my grandfather died at 80.

My brother got married at age 19 and is 32 now and still married. It wasn't easy at the beginning but they are doing really well now.

My sister is getting divorced. Was with her husband for 6 years prior to marriage and married for 4 yrs. It was his decision. There just isn't anything you can do when once person has their mind made up. I never saw it coming, neither did my family. Every situation is different I suppose.

[diesel]

My parents are still married - it will be 35 years next March. Like someone else posted - mine are attached at the hip.

[LyraDora]

my parents were married for 18 years & divorced when i was 8. being young, i didn't realize what was going on, but it still had a big impact on my life. my mom just separted from husband #2 after being married for 10 years & together for 20. this split is one that has been coming for a long time. although i was upset at first (primarily, my sense of stability being shaken & the fact that i just moved back home), i now realize that it is in the best interest for both of them & they will be much happier.

both sets of my grandparents divorced & my maternal grandmother had 2 divorces. i haven't had the best relationship role models so chances are i'll probably divorce too; however, the difference is that i have made it to my mid-20s without marrying and having children so perhaps i'll break the pattern.

p.s. i read somewhere that the couples that are most likely to divorce are ones where the people are critical of one another and don't respect each other's feelings.

[stonemonkey]

Originally posted by LyraDora
so chances are i'll probably divorce too;

really? at least you can learn from their mistakes, right?

[Phoenix]

Originally posted by LyraDora
p.s. i read somewhere that the couples that are most likely to divorce are ones where the people are critical of one another and don't respect each other's feelings.

I think that finances/disagreements over money are a large reason that couples split.

[tina1979]

Originally posted by wordsmith
Well. More than you needed to know. But I just wondered if anyone else is to the point where they could be supportive of a split, when mostly as kids, we all feared that more than anything?

I have to say that I used to wish my parents would get divorced. They fought ALL the time. My dad and I didn't get along at all. It was the typical "favorites". My sister was the baby and could do no wrong in Dad's eyes, so my mom would try to make it up by giving me extra attention (hence, I am a momma's girl and I am not afraid to admit it) Anyway, my mom even moved us out for awhile. When they got back together I didn't go back for another month or two. I didn't want to live with both of them. My dad was never physicaly abusive, but he was sort of emotionaly abusive. Honestly, since my sister and I moved out they are doing great. I know "its not your fault your parents were fighting", but inevitably something one of us did startedthe fight then it just escalated. Not to say they don't argue everyonce in awhile now, but things are so much better. My dad has really changed his attitude. Even towards me. Hes not always pessimistic and hurtful. He actually makes an effort to say or do nice things to me and my sister both.

So in answer to your question I would probably be surprised if they did split now, but I would definately be supportive becausee I would understand where the roots of it came from.

[Multiades]

My parents are still married, but I absolutely can't see why -- if I knew that I would have the life either of them now have when I got older, I'd shoot myself right now.

-Chris

[Tayl405]

My parents have been married for almost 30 years and they're still so happy....as corny as it sounds, that's what I want. They're my "role models" for my marriage (when and if it happens!)

[Multiades]

Originally posted by Tayl405
My parents have been married for almost 30 years and they're still so happy....as corny as it sounds, that's what I want. They're my "role models" for my marriage (when and if it happens!) That's not corny; that's sensible!

-Chris

[MOS9904]

My parents just celebrated 33 years. I have never heard them fight or argue. Sure sometimes they get on one anothers nerves....but they spend tons of time together.

[Ztamala]

My parents have been married for 28 years . They are so adorable togeher, they take long walks every evening,and they always eat dinner together.