Life After College

[mijois]

Where do I begin? Well, I’m at a point where I have no joy. This road of regression began right after I walked across that stage to accept my BS degree. It’s been down hill ever since. I had a major breakdown when I broke up with my wonderful boyfriend of 3 years to talk to a guy who I thought was my friend. It wouldn’t have been so devastating if that so called friend had not just screwed over a good friend of mind. I thought… it was her, he understands me. Well, I learned the hard way that sometimes people just tell you what you want to hear so they can get what they want. That so called friend that I had known 10 years… screwed me over the same way he did my other friend. Then on top of that I lost two friends because of all the drama involved. So, now I vow to have no more close friends because one way or another things will happen and friendships will end. After all that drama, I got back with my boyfriend of 3 years. Well just like before the drama… my relationship with him is the only thing that’s right with my life. But, just like before forces of my unhappiness is trying to rip it apart. What do I want to do with my life? That one thing is the cause of my depression. No one can tell me. I and I alone…I am the only one who can answer that question. I’m stuck in a low paying, dead end job with no marketable skills. I am a walking zombie. My debt has doubled since college. I barely have enough money to pay my bills and my student loans are still on deferment. I have regressed. Now depression has taken away all of my joy and motivation.

[GetMeOuttaDC]

welcome to the boards! there are a lot of nice people here who are dealing with or have dealt with, stuff just like this. it does get better I promise. :)

[mijois]

I know I'm not alone. It just sucks! You spend like 16 years or so in school. Each semester you have new topics, new things to motivate you. But the real world is just a huge disappointment. You do the same thing everyday for 8 hours. At least in school you had different subjects and college... you spent about 3 hours a day in class... and then you are free. I don't see how people work for 25 plus years. I'm going insane after just a few years.

[GetMeOuttaDC]

I don't see how people work for 25 plus years.

It's called therapy. :cool:

[TennisPlayer]

you gotta do something you enjoy doing!!! That's the trick.

I'm a teacher and the little kids say funny things to make me laugh or smile. I love teaching and interacting with kids so I know that's what keeps me motivated besides knowing that God cares about all of us.

He wants us to be winners, not whiners. You can always meet new people. Look at what you do have and what you can do.

Lots of people need to stop the negative thinking and change their attitude then they'll see everything is better!!!
(includ me at times but I'm working on it!)

[mijois]

I need to think positive but it’s so hard. I use to have faith. When I prayed the hardest, for months and months asking for direction… I got the devil. My life was turned upside down. I trusted a friend of 10 years only to find out he was the devil in disguise. It was the biggest jerry springer episode you can imagine. I learned that I’m the only one who can make me happy and whenever I run into people who say they understand… I proceed with caution. Oh, and I will never have any more close friends. Anyway, I’m totally off the subject…back to the point. I love animals. As a kid, I wanted to be a Vet. That was my dream. Now, it’s too late….I would be in school forever. I thought about the vet tech thing but I can’t live off that salary because it’s less than I make now… right now I’m one step from being homeless.

[heatherf]

mijois- I think for me, it was kinda coming to terms with a couple things:

1) I am NOT my job
2) My job is only a means to an end

And I really do love the job I have now, the first one in which I haven't actively been looking for another.....BUT I whole heartedly understand the saying; "Working for the weekend". I love my job, but I love not being at my job even more.

[mijois]

But how can you do what you love if it doesn't pay enough to live? Oh, I could do what I love and get a part time job. Then I would have to work twice as much to make ends meet and on top of that I will not have any free time.

[lawya girl]

I totally understand where you're coming from Mijois. I HATE my job but I can't quit because I am so far in debt. I am a lawyer and during law school, my husband and I used credit cards to pay for everything, including our wedding, (he's a lawyer too) so now I am STUCK here for at least another year. I have days when I think I can survive and days when I think I can't stand it for another second (today is the latter). There are lots of things I would LOVE to do but I have bills to pay and I can't accept a low paying job (which they all are, of course). I have no family around. I do have a couple of close friends but everyone I know is a lawyer so no one is ever around - always at work. Everyone around me seems to adjust so much better than me. I have always been a content person - UNTIL I graduated from law school and entered "the real world." Now I almost don't even recognize myself.

So, this is not a very cheery email, but misery loves company. Here's hoping we'll both find our way!